I have a friend who has been with her partner for the last 7 years, they are engaged to get married this Christmas. He has known a girl from his childhood a lot longer, they have never been romantically involved at all, just best friends. My friend and this other girl have become really close friends too, but since she left her husband she has been spending a lot of time with my friend's partner, again, nothing going on, she's just been confiding in him an awful lot as he's her best friend.
My friend has now gone a bit crazy... she has said some really nasty things to this other woman, who didn't deserve any of it... and she asked her partner to choose between his best friend and her which has destroyed him... she's so upset and doesn't know how to fix this...
Any suggestions?
2006-08-05 22:11:24 · 11 answers · asked by Saccharin 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Maybe she should just apologize to the friend for her behavior, but let her know (and her fiance' know) that the current situation is making her very uncomfortable and she's having a difficult time dealing with it. I don't think he should necessarily "choose" between them, but for the sake of his relationship with both of them, some sort of compromise needs to be worked out.
2006-08-05 22:24:53 · answer #1 · answered by Avid 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Well I'm in a similar situation... as the best friend of the guy.... and quite honestly this "friend" of yours is a complete nit-wit for even thinking that her friend is remotely interested in her man in that way....
The way I see my friend is purely as a brother figure and would puke my guts up to think of him in other way... to make him choose, I can see how that would destroy him... but don't make him choose... if I was the other "woman" I would love him too much as a friend to make him do that and I would walk away... pity your friend doesn't seem to love him or trust him as much..
I hope your friend and her man have a very happy life together....and I hope she's pleased with herself at making two people that love her feel utterly miserable...
I dont' think it can be fixed....its probably gone beyond that now... it can never be the same again..... I don't think you'll have any more trouble from the friend.
2006-08-06 05:57:01 · answer #2 · answered by dirtyminx82 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She can apologise individually to each of them and admit it's due to her fear of losing her man. This is obvious to all 3 of them already but it needs to be said. Her man should already understand that...if he doesn't then he is emotionally underdeveloped. The "other" woman will understand also and will be much more guarded about hanging around. If anyone is to "blame" its the man. He must have been blind to the implications but should let his fiancee know that he has been naive. Time will do the rest....whatever that may be, but it will not wreck a relationship based on a firm foundation.
Finally, ("Good" I hear you say) - your friends do get themselves in knots don't they!...but you are a real mate trying to help them.
2006-08-07 03:50:58 · answer #3 · answered by michael m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh this sounds like hell... a lot of jealousy going on somewhere.....i think the girl whos trying to make him choose between her and his best friend needs a good slap! she shouldnt make someone choose its downright selfish.....she needs to trust him that this other girl is a friend only and try and get this other girl to involve both partners when she needs to confide rather than confiding in the male and making his girlfriend jealous....i think she needs to apologise aswell....for saying nasty things and just to explain that she felt jealous and pushed out...
2006-08-06 05:43:30 · answer #4 · answered by sadie 69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if your frined's partner have trust in him so he should never ask for any selection i think ur frined has taken a wrong step which wil definately affect her future relation is it not at all necessary that a boy and girl should have only that relation there are so many relation in the world so y people think in that way we are the one who should take the initative to change this outlook so ask ur friend to have a clean and polite tlk with both of them take care bye
2006-08-06 05:19:50 · answer #5 · answered by chiku 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Write a screenplay and ask if Julia Roberts is interested. Needs a happy ending though, so I suggesst they talk it out properly first. Anyone should ditch a friend for a wife, his wife should be his best friend
2006-08-06 05:16:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is in a relationship and its driving his GF crazy, he needs to stop talking to the other girl. He needs to choose, if i was his GF i would be long gone by now.
2006-08-06 05:25:54 · answer #7 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the long term friend of his has suddenly realised she might lose him, or has feelings more than friendship....
lot of green eyes in this group......
your mate thinks she has a threat.. they need to talk as adults..
2006-08-06 05:25:42 · answer #8 · answered by paulrb8 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
aaah female jealousy what would we ever do without it.
I think the best solution would be the easiest one
APOLOGISE for whatever she did wrong
2006-08-06 05:19:50 · answer #9 · answered by peter gunn 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
threesome??
sorry couldnt resist. sounds a right mess though
2006-08-06 08:00:18 · answer #10 · answered by ???????????? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋