I got married two years back. My wife always inspires me to live separately. My parents & other members were coperative to her but now they dislike my wife due to her talkative nature & complaining attitude. She left me two times & stayed with her parents. I and my family members broght her our home after many requests. But again she leaft our home quaralling with my mom & younger brother. She tells me over phone that if I sepatelely live then she will come to live with me. In fact, my parents are very old due to their age. They need good behaviour. In this situation I can not live with her seperately. My wife's parents also dislike my parents & my brothers. Please advice me how to modify my wife.
2006-08-05 22:05:00 · 8 answers · asked by Omar Siddiqui 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Other - Arts & Humanities
You're a Muslim. Forget about this wife, you still can take 3 more!
2006-08-06 09:20:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
First relax.
See, your wife will understand parenthood when she becomes one.
Buy some time from her, Tell her that you may think about her suggestion in another 1-2 years and in this time try to get a baby. Once baby is there, she will know what love for kids mean and what children mean to parents.
Moreover, try to make clear to your wife on which fronts you can compromise and on which you'll never.
Understand this if you love her and want her to live together with you and your family, it is very important that she loves you too.
And if she loves you she should adjust on a few things also.
Try to reduce the interference of your inlaws in your personal family matters.
And when they express that they don't love your family members stand up and tell them that you love them and won't hear anything unjust against them.
If everything else fails. try to get some relative or common friend talk to both of you separately and convey each other's point of view.
Cheers :)
For health & beauty tips visit:
http://www.freewebs.com/beautytip/
2006-08-05 22:17:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move to America where wives always do what they are told what to do.
.
.
.
. . . . . . in case you didn't pick up on that -that statement was a funny joke and not serious at all.
Here are some of the reasons why wives are sometimes not cooperative with their "husbands" .
Some of the husbands are slobs and inconsiderate people and the wives cannot stand to be with them at all.
Some of the husbands are overbearing and not kind and not polite to their wives, thus........
Some of the wives are being deprived of normal, decent courtesy and food and things they need for living -while some of the husbands dress in the finest and get everything they want. Men need to learn that wives are just as important as husbands EVEN if the wife doesn 't work at an outside job. So, treating a wife very sweetly, very kindly and acknowledging to her that she is awesome might be a good place for you to start IF you really want your wife to begin liking you. YOu need to show and tell her that she is as important as you are OR more important than you are. IF you cannot do this , you will live separately all your long life.
Some of the husbands are not faith full people, so when the husbands cheat or do things they shouldn't do, of course the wife wants to live separate. I'm not saying you do this. I'm just giving examples of why wives leave husbands.
SOME of the husbands come to this free country and then expect their wives, in the middle of this modernization and wonderful free country -to follow the old-fashioned ideas and culture of their "old" country rather than follow the rules and regulations and attitudes in America. If you want to live backwards in the old culture, your wife might not follow or listen to your ideas. In America, women are free and have been free for hundreds of years. So, just the fact that you use those words --"modify' my wife, lets me know that you are taking the whole wrong approach to letting someone want to be with you .
I'd say if anyone was going to modify me , they'd be living alone --separately too, except I wouldn't even bother to tell them, I'd just be like they do in Missouri , I'd SHOW him .
Living separately might be your best option if you want to live in the dark ages where men used to "modify ' their wives.
This is 2006, and in this year, wives are separate and they are independent, and they are intelligent, and they are above all -they are FREE to think what they want to think .
Have you perhaps needed to change her thinking also?
If you really want your wife to be cooperative, you need first to look deep inside yourself and in your family and examine what it is that you want her to cooperate with .
If you are asking her to give up her freedom of speaking or going places and having fun (not taking away from your marriage). If you are asking to follow her around twenty-four seven and act as if you do own her, then you might as well live separately because no free-thinking woman would allow you to do that to them and stay with you .
I don't know what your problem is or what the quarreling is about but I'm willing to guess that you've not typed the whole story there or told us YOUR PART in the quarrels or YOUR PART in the need for modification .
You write that your wife "inspires me to live separately" . Well, then , why not take her up on her 'inspiration" and live separately so that both of you can live HAPPILY EVER AFTER?
Have a peaceful day.
2006-08-06 00:36:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
People don't change.
That's one life lesson you are learning, yes?
Everyone is an individual, not even God interferes with a persons free will.
YOU are the one that needs modifying... even if you don't thinks so (because of your desire to control material nature) doesn't make that fact less true.
Cut your loses quick and move on... otherwise the situation will go and and on forever.
I just hope to God you are not one of those "honor killing" savages.
2006-08-05 22:13:23 · answer #4 · answered by dave_martin_7777 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Modifying" your wife is not a worthwhile endeavor. Its like dressing a camel like a cow. Yeah, it might look believable, but it won't "moo" and don't friggin' try to milk it.
People are who they are; they don't really change. If you want to keep the same wife, then it will be far, far easier for you to "modify" yourself.
My advice, find a good divorce lawyer. If you don't believe in divorce, try "modifying" your opinion.
2006-08-05 22:14:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha.. good luck. Wow.. you need to come to america. You wouldnt be in charge.
you cant change a wife and dont think about trying to kill her out of honor. You will only go to hell for being a murdering chauvanist.
2006-08-05 22:08:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u r very sad dude but my advise is that u live separately with u parent but stay closed in case u are needed in time of emergency
2006-08-05 22:12:22 · answer #7 · answered by abdul k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
watch cesear milan on the national geographic program titled "the dog whisperer"
2006-08-05 22:08:45 · answer #8 · answered by silas h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋