I was in a department store with my 4-year-old nephew when he started pulling clothes off of shelves. I told him that if he didn't stop by the time I got to 3 he would be spanked. I got to 3, he didn't stop, so he got 1 swift swat across the rear. This white lady began throwing a fit about my "beating that poor child!" and on and on. A black lady nearby said "My kids didn't have the luxurey of getting to three and they didn't get just one swat on the butt!" She also told the other lady to mind her own business and that she had no clue as to what "beating a child really was."
Why is there such a difference between cultures? I felt that I had the right to spank my nephew because he was behaving inapproapatly. So why would this woman start being a Drama-Mama about abuse?
2006-08-05 16:33:52 · 8 answers · asked by Firefly 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Everyone has their own way with dealing with young children behaving inappropriately. I personally would not have given the count of three. Some people would say why swat the butt it is not the butt that was pulling the clothes off the shelves it was the hands smack the hands.
There is no manual written on how to discipline children properly. One just does as one has been disciplined or as one feels is the appropriate way of dealing with the situation. Most of the time it is done correctly and sometimes not in other peoples minds. Sometimes the discipline does not fit the infraction and that is where the abuse comes in. A normal person would not hold a child's hands over the burner of a stove because they did something inappropriate with their hands or lock the child in a closet or dark basement for other infractions or whack, punch, kick or beat a child senseless but you hear about some of these on occasion usually read in the newspaper about an upcoming trial.
I think it is abusive when the people actually do not give discipline to a child. Let's say little 4 yr.old Ashley in a store doing the exact thing that your nephew was doing the mother says "Ashely stop that or you will get a time out." Well Ashley knows that she won't get a time out so she continues. The mother says"Ashley now stop that" and she continues until she is either bored or sees something else that catches her eye and the mother is frantically putting the things back on the shelves behind the little cherub.
I don't know what I would have done in your situation. I may have asked the "Drama-Mama what she would recommend doing and call her bluff or tell her to go ahead and call the cops or just ignore her as you aparently did. If one swat on the butt got the message across to your nephew that is great and most likely he will not do that again at least while he is with you.
2006-08-05 17:34:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
some people just don't get it. I raise mine the way "I" want to. If they need a spanken they will give it right when there doing wrong, not wait until we get home stuff. It hurts their feelings more if there are people watching. I don't care route me own and be against me. their mine, and will be displined. Why people believe in different things, don't know,don't care. If I listen to how everyone wants me to raise them, they won't know whats right and wrong and right now they do. If i say 1 they movenver have to reach 2 or 3. (i'm white)
2006-08-05 23:39:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Culture....my mother...who is white...would have knocked me out...and put my unconcious *** in the car....you can't really say why do white people do this, why do black people do that...it's certainly reasonable to ask...why does it seem that one group seems to do one thing or the other...but you'll find given a large enough sample of data..the disparity isn't wide enough to warrant labeling one group's preferences very far apart from another...
Regardless, it's all about the culture in which one is raised...
white people tend to be noisy? HA...I hope lesha meant nosy...which I would agree with...blacks tend to be noisy...
2006-08-05 23:42:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I wish I knew ,as I tend to not spank my kids in public for that reason.(I'm white)
2006-08-05 23:40:05 · answer #4 · answered by mustanglady 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
white people tend to be noisy and black people know what discipline is about whoop his ***
2006-08-05 23:41:02 · answer #5 · answered by Iesha 1 · 1⤊ 4⤋
u go iesha i agree wit iesha
2006-08-05 23:51:16 · answer #6 · answered by Tammy 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
it's ok to beat animals. not babies. so whites are expected to have a higher standard.
2006-08-05 23:39:19 · answer #7 · answered by chuckclone1 2 · 1⤊ 5⤋
i have no idea, maybe black people are just ghetto!!!!
2006-08-05 23:38:42 · answer #8 · answered by Tori C 1 · 2⤊ 3⤋