i need help??? plz....plz?

Question

i think i have high self esteem but whenever someone prettier or better looking comes in front of me my self esteem drops low. i also pay a lot of attention to what people think about me....their comments can make or break my day...its sad!so i think i pay too much attention on others than myself.....this sux......any suggestion on NOT COMPARING MYSELF ALL THE TIME.....ok plz no rude comments and thankyou for your hepl

Answer 1

I am 22 years old, and have struggled with the same issues my whole life! Let me tell you that this is very common, a lot of women feel this way. It just takes a lot of guts to admit. Once you talk about it, just like you are now, things will get better.
I'm sure you are a very pretty lady. Sometimes when we have the good looks, we focus all of our attention on trying to be the best of the best. Instead of focusing on showing your personality, and trying to win someone over with that instead of relying on what we look like. Think about it. It's very common. It just takes time and practice. You have to have self discipline. Accept who you are faults and all. That's what makes you, YOU! Be proud, and if some one wants make a rude comment to you, it's probably because they are jealous. Keep in mind, there is always someone prettier, smarter, whatever.
I can relate to you very much. I'm a little ditsy sometimes. I mess up on stupid no brainier things at times. I tend to focus on what others thing too. You will always struggle some, because that is one of your natural faults. But you can help yourself improve by a lot. Good luck. If you need to chat, drop me and email...:)

Answer 2

I am sorry to have to say this but if you really did have a high self-esteem then you would not get like that in front of others, So why don't you try and work with that factor concentrate on your self-esteem when there are prettier better looking etc people around you and just try not to concentrate so hard on the people around you, pretend that they are not there for a while if you can, Try searching the library for some self help books or talk to someone about this issue and get some help, either way you will need to sort this issue out as soon as you possibly can as if you are worrying about this now it is obviously going to affect you more and more as you get older and it may gradually start to affect your confidence etc. So sort it out as soon as you can OK hunny. xx

Answer 3

No, you have low self esteem, and you need to stop worrying about what others say. A beautiful woman might be beautiful but she could be the most awful person in the world. It's what's inside a person that counts not their looks. It's personality and a good nature that wins hands down.

There are people out there with no limbs, I don't hear them moaning, they just get on with their lives and live it. You must do the same. Tell yourself every day that you are beautiful, you have a good personality and a good heart, you care about others because they are important. Tell yourself that you are pleased that you have so much to give the world and you are pleased with who you are.

Now you take care and remember how important you are..

Answer 4

Seems like ur self esteem is all down. Dont give up.Think that every human has something beautiful and lovely. There is a saying - every "head" is a "world". You cannot control and consider everybody's opinions.Begin from having ur own opinion.It doesnt matter what people say - there are milions that cross ur life - will u pay attention to all they say? And stop comparing yourself - ur not an object - a car a dress or something else - ur human - and there is nobody else in this world like you..be smart , love and enjoy yourself!:))

Answer 5

Tis may seem like a long answer and in parts may be a bit harsh but please consider what I am saying as I hope it will help you.

So what would make you happy - to be the most physically perfect person in the world, a beautiful Adonis beyond mortal comparison whom most people who meet you would die for at a word? Think about it carefully and you will realise that all that is wrong with you is that you are placing your feeling of self-worth behind an impossible and unattainable ideal.
What I would reccomend is attempting to be less superficial in how you judge yourself and actually take a moment to realise there is more to life than percieved physical beauty. If you truely believe the most important thing you can be is the prettiest then you are really lacking in any real goals and also in common sense.
Yesterday I was out with a friend of mine and a stanger in a bar went up to him and for no reason said "You are fat" and he replied "Thanks for noticing" - you should be more like that.

You basically have two options on how to go on with your life:
1 - Admit to yourself that appearance is all that really matters to you and that becoming prettier is the only worthwhile goal in life. Then get a fantastic job and get all the make-up and surgery you need to become so beautiful that there is no point comparing youself to normal people and you only have to worry about super-models.
2 - Realise that there is more to life than physical beauty and then you will not need to compare your appearance with others.

If you don't care what people are like inside and only care about how pretty other people are compared to you then good luck with that. If youwant to be happy then be less superfical and realise that APPEARANCE DOES NOT MATTER.

In the Victorian Era there was a man called Joseph Merrick, he was badly deformed and was known as the Elephantman. He was probably the most disfigured person to have ever lived but he was not the sort of person who would complain about his life, here is a peom he used to often quote:
"Tis true my form is something odd,
But blaming me is blaming God;
Could I create myself anew
I would not fail in pleasing you.
If I could reach from pole to pole
Or grasp the ocean with a span,
I would be measured by the soul;
The mind's the standard of the man."
I hope that you see the meaning of this.

I hope you have a great life and soon can feel as good inside as you really deserve to. Have fun!

Answer 6

You have very low self esteem. High self esteem is when you value things about yourself and dont care what others think. Also, your self worth is based soley on your looks.

Find other stuff you value in other people and in yourself.

Your shallow existence is dragging you down. Think about what really matters in the big picture of life.

Answer 7

Unfortunately, even though some have suggested and it, advice telling you to work on your self esteem will not work. Nothing is as simple as that. Just try to be happy baby.

Answer 8

you should't pay attention on what other people think just be you and love who you are and the way you look when you stop thinking about what other people think about you life is going to be better live life the way you want to live life good luck with every thing

Answer 9

If you've got a close friend, try slagging each other off ( tell them first ) to thicken your skin, you know they don't mean it.

Then you've just got to concentrate on self in certain situations and not bother what other people are doing.

Answer 10

Apparently you do not have high self-esteem. Work on that and all will be good.