one of my good friends lives a good 40 minute drive away and although i try visit her at least twice a week she never drives down to me she always has some excuse about her car like the boot keeps opening when she is driving or the windows wont stay up, but yet when ive spoken to other friends thay have seen her shopping around by were i live ,but when i say why didnt you call in she says , oh it was just a quick visit and had to rush back but if i was up shopping by hers i would call into her even if it was for 5 mins thats just the person i am,
i havent been up to hers for the past 2 weeks because i just feel like im being used , my husband says its all in my head and i should stop being stupid and go visit her , but my point is why should i be the one that does all the driving ,i have 2 small children i have to take with me aswell and my friend has none, what do use reckon should i just go up or not.
2006-08-05 12:20:31 · 15 answers · asked by fafandloo 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
is she a true friend? has she called to say she's missed you because you've not been?
what do you gain from going to see her?
what would you loose if you didn't go anymore?
all questions i know I'm sorry but i think you need to evaluate your friendship sounds to me like your a good friend to her but it's all a one way thing.
i mean why doesn't she pop in when she's near? is it because she really doesn't want to see you?
i think you need to stick with friends who are just that. a friend who will, love you treat you with respect and all that you deserve.
good luck and i hope i haven't hurt your feelings x
2006-08-05 12:32:57 · answer #1 · answered by tuppassister 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's in your head. She makes a 40 min drive to your area to shop but can't let you know that's she's coming to your part of town? But you drive 40 min to see her 2 times a week? C'mon! I'd say you better take a closer look at this "friendship". If she is shopping in your area and dosen't even attempt to visit you while she's there, what does that tell you? Sit her down and tell her exactly how you feel. It's obvious you are being used! Friendship is a two-way street!
2006-08-05 19:46:03 · answer #2 · answered by Pancho 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hiya, from what you've said I'd be inclined to tell her exactly how you feel and explain to her that it upsets you - if she is a true friend she will want to make sure that she makes more of an effort to come pay you a visit for a change because your her friend so surely if your upset she will want to ensure that you are happy in future!
If she doesn't understand your point of view then i'm sorry but I would stop visiting her and see how she likes it..
2006-08-05 19:29:48 · answer #3 · answered by maidenrocks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't give in and visit her, she obviously isn't a true friend, does she phone u or do u do all the phoning? i had a friend like that once we r no longer friends,friendship is a 2 way street and it seems to me as urs is a 1 way street, u can do a lot btr, no-1 likes 2 b used but it's only u that can put a stop to it.
2006-08-06 10:22:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best friends that I treasure are ones with whom the connection is a two way street. You situation is very familiar to me and after a number of years of being the only one who called or visited decided I don't need that sort of relationship and quit. Haven't heard a word from one of them and, frankly, don't miss it. The two-way ones are treasures though. You're the boss.
2006-08-05 19:35:49 · answer #5 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she cared enough she'd come see you. I had a friend like that once. She used to call me and say 'can you come get me in your car so i can visit you, by the way is blah blah shop/store near you?'
2006-08-06 10:33:33 · answer #6 · answered by abi_sweetgirl23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is she really such a good friend? think about it - why doesn't she call to see you when shes up your way? why so many excuses.Stay away for a while see if she makes the effort, perhaps now you have children and she doesn't you are moving in different circles and growing apart.
2006-08-05 19:34:54 · answer #7 · answered by Dolly Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell her how you really feel. Maybe, then she'll stop by, but don't go to her house make her come to you. I would call her and let her know, then I wouldn't call her or go by her house. Hopefully everything will work-out.
2006-08-05 19:38:05 · answer #8 · answered by Tiffany 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope you right stand your ground...Just like you can visit her she can visit you..Or she could @ least call and say that she is in your area...That way you all can meet for lunch.
2006-08-05 19:27:51 · answer #9 · answered by Majenta 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think your friend should make the effort to visit you, she is taking advantage of you, the fact that you visit her all the time, doesnt sound fair to me
2006-08-05 19:26:39 · answer #10 · answered by The girl from Oz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋