how do you deal with the loss of a pet you were really close to?

Question

My dad brought home a baby bird one night after work. It had been in the road all day and survived. I took it in and raised it. i spent every minute i could with him. when i let him out of his cage, he would get on my shoulder or head and never wanted to get off. One day i ran out of his food, i made sure he had bird seed(i dont think he liked it) and lots of water. we own a restarant, so i was gone all day. i woke up the next morning and was going to feed him some bread we bought, he was gone. i was so close to him, and its my fault he is gone. i didnt tell anyone the first day because i didnt know how, so i wrote my mom a note. today i stayed home from work, i have been crying every minute i was alone, and all day today. i just dont know what to do. can anyone help me out?

p.s. i am only 14.

Answer 1

It is not your fault. If he had seed and was hungry he would have eaten it. It was just his time to go.
Time will heal everything and you will remember the happy times together without remembering the hurt.
During grieving it is natural to feel guilty, you always think you could have done something different.
L&L
M

Answer 2

I have lost a few pets in the past. It's really hard because to the owners they feel like they are almost human. They are part of your family. Thats why it's so hard. It hurts alot inside... and the feeling won't go away for a little while. The best thing you can do to ease the pain is to think about all the happy times you have had with your pet. Or maybe see if your parents would let you get another pet to take your mind off it. You'll be so busy with your new little pet that you won't have as much time to think about it. And it's okay to be sad and cry...it's natural!

Hope this helps! And I am sorry about your loss. I know how it feels!

Answer 3

It is hard to lose a loved one, weather its human or animal. The only thing that can help you get over this is time. Some people go out and get another pet the same day, and some have to wait 6 months to a year or longer. Neither one is wrong. It is up to the person. If your way of dealing with it is to cry for 3 months straight then that is what you have to do. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Good luck to you in whatever you feel you need to do.

Answer 4

When I was about your age, my hamster died. She was in her cage dead. I can remember the overwhelming anguish I felt. I cried and cried. I wondered if I did something wrong and if was it my fault. I still wonder about that and I'm a grandmother now.

What I know now that I didn't know then is that when you love you have pain, heartache. Somewhere it says that the amount of pain is based on how great your love was/is.

I also know about grief. Grief is the hardest work you will ever do. The crying is a very important part of it. It takes as long as it takes and you will eventually have to feel the feelings -- all of them, but it takes time.

And I've come to believe that things like losing your wonderful bird and all the terrible pain and sadness and guilt and anger you feel and will feel, prepares you to help someone later in your life by truly understanding how they feel.

I hope a warm loving sense comes to you with this answer. I feel those things for you. I hope your parents will fill in for the actual physical part and give you a huge hug and let you cry and cry and wash your face gently with a cool wet cloth.

My hamster's name was Matilda, by the way.

Answer 5

Oh, I'm sorry you lost your bird! I've lost 2 dogs in the last 9 months! I know how you feel! Think of it this way... it could be true! Your pet could have flown away and maybe someone saw it and took it! Now it has a chance to live a great life! Hope this helps! Use this strategy when you think about your bird! Think of the best home for your bird! Sry for your loss!

Answer 6

Not knowing how old the bird was it makes it difficult to determine why he is gone. Usually any animal does OK for 24 hours if they have water.

Please, don't blame yourself it is not your fault. Nature has a way of taking care of its own, even if it makes us sad.

I have taken many newborn kittens in because their mom was killed or abandoned them and they didn't all make it, and I've done this for 30 or more years.

It was very caring of you and your dad to take care of him in the first place. Please, don't let this get you too far down. There are many, many more little ones out there that may need your help. Don't turn them away if that should happen.

You are a wonderful young person and I wish you many good things.

Answer 7

I am 14 too, and i know how it feels to lose a pet you were very close to. I still cry when i think about my 1st cat named Lucky. I put all of my love into him and then one day he died suddenly of a heart attack. I cried and cried and missed a week of school. There is really no way to get over it, but since he is lost and not dead, then maybe you could put up signs and get people to help you search, also maybe you should contact your local bird watcher club and have them keep an eye out for your bird. Remember that hope dies last and you should still have hope!

Answer 8

Aw, sweetie, it wasn't your fault! A bird CAN NOT die from one day of not eating. How do you thing they survive all winter? Thay certainly don't eat every day. When your dad brought the bird home I bet it had some internal injuries that you did not know about, and that's what killed it. You took care of this little creature that would have died right away otherwize, and you should be proud of that. I know you miss your friend, but it will be OK, I promise. No one will blame you. Trust me honey, it wasn't your fault.

Answer 9

I know how you feel.I have a horse that we are going to have to put down pretty soon becuuse she has really bad arthritus in her knee. It hurts her to even walk.I've had her for three years.We haven't put her down yet and I'm allready crying sometimes becuase I know what is ahead of me.You become attached and your pet becomes your friend and someone you would talk to when you felt bad. It wasn't your fault he/she is gone.You couldn't control if he/she liked the food or not.You didn't know.Try keeping yourself accupied to get your mind of it.once your over it get another bird to make it feel like he/she is still there.Talk to your mom about it.They always have the ansewers.I hope this ansewer makes you feel some what better even though you will never forget about that one bird.

Answer 10

I had to put my cat to sleep after 13 years (about 5months ago) and yesterday my other cat died of cancer. all I know , is that it really SUCKS big time when you lose a pet.
Honey, cry all you want as long as you want. Unfortunately, time is the only thing that will help the pain lessen. Also, don't let other people imply that you are silly for crying over "just a pet"