My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years.. Over the years we have had some problems and I haven't always been faithful. Although thats over with and he always questions me now, everyday... who i've been talking to... where i went... and he says he doesnt believe me? so how am i suppose to prove myself to him if all i have is my word?
2006-08-05 04:37:56 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well u have 2 b patient wif this one. but u know wen he needs 2 stop too.
since u have confessed ur doings, it is now clear that u were not as dishonest after all. if u could have wished u could have not told him or justify urself. but u did.
take som time wif him. but if he is goin 2 keep doin this, then its time for u 2 walk off ahead of him.
well u made a mistake dus not mean that he will questionin u until eternity.
once u reached the hilts of patience ask him 2 stop. if he still continues, make him ub=nderstand that u were honest 2 confess. and let him know that him suspectin u is in turn drivin u apart and leavin u hurt.
if he still does it like most jerks do, walk off him. but keep this as a lesson and never repeat ur mistakes.
2006-08-05 04:49:28 · answer #1 · answered by marissa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
obviously yer word doesnt mean much 2 him so that isnt the way to his heart. spend some time apart but never play the blame game and say that ull get back together when he finally realizes that he is an idiot. That is the worst move. tell him how u feel admit u havent been faithful and if u guys r really in luv it will work out. Spend time apart (like broken up) but dont check out other guys or flirt and make sure he knows that ur misrable without him that ur srry and that u love him o and dont do it the stupid way lie on da fone or internet this is an in person kinda thing. if u luv him ull respect his decision on weather or not u 2 get bakk together or not. dont blame him..remember even if u dont want to u screwed up the relationship..it ur job to fix it
2006-08-05 04:46:51 · answer #2 · answered by toriiiiii 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long ago did you cheat?
It takes a different amount of time to build trust back up for every person. IF you have a past of lying and cheating, Don't you think it's reasonable to say that you aren't as trustworthy as you think? Just be open and honest with him. If he questions, just tell him. If he doesn't believe you that's on him. But don't lie and get caught up in it again, or it'll make things worse. Start bringing a friend when you go out or give him ways to easily check up on you. something like that should help. But also be cautious, if it's been years... and he's acting weird and not believe you - sometimes that's a guilty concious - maybe he's doing something he shouldn't be. Just keep a straight head on your shoulders and be open and honest and COMMUNICATE. You'll be fine!
2006-08-05 04:43:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
SInce you were unfaithful, you have to expect your bf to have some trust issues. BUT this does not give him the right to give you the 3rd degree everyday and then claim he doesn't believe you. If he has decided, despite your unfaithfulness, that he wants to be in a relationship with you, then he will have to get over it or get out. It is unfair to both of you to have to live like this. It is not happiness nor is it a healthy relationship. Hope this helps. P.S. In the future, try to stay faithful to avoid such problems!
2006-08-05 04:46:14 · answer #4 · answered by Lil' Angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's impossible to "prove" faithfulness. That's why cheating is so harmful. Once it happens, it is no longer an impossibility. A relationship requires trust. Give him some time. But, if his 3rd degree continues indefinitely, then I gotta say that your relationship is doomed. Only you can know if he can put this in the past. He can't punish, or hold on to the hurt forever. If he does, end it.
2006-08-05 05:37:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In a way you cannot blame him for being suspicious. If you were unfaithful in the past, you broke the trust in the relationship. It is going to be hard for him to trust you now. Put yourself in his shoes, you would be just as paranoid. My suggestion is that you make sure to spend all your free time with him and if you go out, take him with you. The only way you are going to get over this is to prove to him that you are now faithful. Good Luck.
2006-08-05 04:43:14 · answer #6 · answered by trace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to remember when you cheated the every ounce of trust he had in you and in the relationship fell to pieces. He is probably afraid to give all of himself because you cheated on him...why would he want to put himself through it again. You'll have to earn his trust back. It's going to take time, just be open and honest. Maybe before he ask you just tell him. Don't give him the opition to have to worry or ask come out and tell him. Maybe he just can't get past this and if that is the case then you both should part ways. I
2006-08-05 05:33:03 · answer #7 · answered by glamr216 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will never believe you or trust you. It's clear by him asking you these questions. He hasn't forgiven you so he can't move forward nor can he trust you. Sorry, but it's the way it is. Unless he can forgive you for not being faithful to him, there is no relationship. It will only get worse.
2006-08-05 07:07:26 · answer #8 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You lost his trust in the past can you really blame the guy but it has already been done and he wanted to continue with the relationship he needs to learn to trust you again if he is going to stay in this relationship. It will take a long time for him to trust you but he needs to put the affair behind him.
2006-08-05 04:44:17 · answer #9 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't. The distrust will always be there, you earned it. So you can either learn to live with it and maybe it gets better over a long period of time, or you leave and start a new relationship.
2006-08-05 08:22:21 · answer #10 · answered by Islandkiwi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋