I'm suffering from shyness can anyone help me?

Question

I'm desperately in need of a remedy for social shyness.Any hints and tips would be greatly appreciated.

Answer 1

You took a great first step by posting a question.

Think of it like this - we all have a creator in common so those other people can't be so bad, can they.

And if it's your self esteem, just remember, God created you. Also, no one has ever died from embarassment.

Answer 2

Well, if it's a low-level case, where you're just uncomfortable in social settings, you can always try bringing a friend to kind of introduce you around a bit. It can be a little demeaning, but having someone you trust nearby to support you can ease off the pressure of getting to know new people.

You can also try just switching your attitude for a short time and being the biggest social butterfly ever. It's more risky, and you're bound to have at least one awkward moment, but living on the other extreme, even for one night, can make edging away from your own extreme easier by comparison.


If your shyness is more severe, where you're actually afraid in the social scene, I'd recommend a psychologist. In all seriousness, a private, confidential meeting with someone you can be truly honest with can help just by itself, let alone what the therapist may recommend.

Answer 3

Shyness stems directly from the fear of rejection. What you have to realize is that there is no reality, and only perception. Once you realize this, you will also realize that what one person thinks has nothing directly to do with what you think, unless you agree. And then, once you realize that, you realize that some people will love you, and a few won't, but for those that don't, it doesn't matter, because there is only perception, and for those few don't matter, since it is only in their minds that there's anything wrong with you. All that matters in this is what you think of youself, so start thinking of yourself in a more positive light. Get in shape, and feel free to change anything about you that you want to, because it's you, and you have the right, but only if you want to. I know you'll make it, if you want to enough, and don't quit.

Answer 4

When I was in kindergarten & elementary school I was so shy I wouldn't read when the teacher would ask me to & I refused to speak in class. It was really uncomfortable. I honestly don't know how I got over it, but I would imagine there is some kind of support group out there for shy people. Maybe... I wish you luck. You may want to look at the book "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay. It talks about all kinds of different things, everything starts with loving yourself.

Answer 5

Don't do alcohol, it is not a solution, it will just ultimately make you an alcoholic. you need to do a lot of psychological work to figure out why you are that way, looking deep into your childhood, and figure out the roots. There may be medical causes, and Chinese medicine has a lot of answers. Remember that some people are naturally introverted. It's also a function of age and development, some shy people ultimately become outgoing when they mature.

Answer 6

I dont know if this helps but I was really shy in high school. If a girl even talked to me I would blush like crazy. My senior year I decided to not be shy anymore. I joined the track team, stage crew, whatever I could to force me into social situations. By the end of my senior year I was "cured" The only way to do it without taking medication (which I would NOT suggest) is to put yourself into situations where you have to be social.

Answer 7

* Practise becoming fascinated by other people. Ask them about themselves, and concentrate when they answer you. Remember what they tell you about themselves so you can talk about it later, or on another occasion.


* Great socialisers make other people feel comfortable and interesting. How do they do that? By being really, genuinely interested in other people. If you are talking to someone and you feel boring or inferior, ask why that is. Is it really all your fault?


* Practise using fewer 'personal pronouns' when you talk about things. Sentences beginning with 'I' are not only a turn-off for the listener, they also keep the focus of attention on you, which increases shyness. (Note: Of course, part of friendship is giving away things about yourself, but only when you feel it is appropriate to do so.)


* Remember that the way to overcome shyness is to focus elsewhere. Like on imagining what it will be like to really enjoy the social event, on how it will feel to be full of energy, or to be having a great conversation with someone.

Answer 8

Start small.
A small group of people is less daunting.
Chat slowly with no shouting.
Listen & speak only when UR confident of what UR saying.
Don't expect URself 2 B king of the Blah in 2 mins flat.
Relax & enjoy listening, as well as talking.

Answer 9

I can recommend a very good book to you. It is written by Tracy Cox and is called "Superflirt". It may be a really good help to you. Her techniques do not apply for flirts only but also to a common behaviour among a society. Just try it! Its price is 12.49 pounds.

One example from her book: When you are really really shy, and you want to talk to someone but you are afraid of looking into the person's eyes, then you should look at his nose. Your conversation partner will not notice your looking at her/his nose.

Answer 10

Prozac would help as a medicine but, the best remedy is to talk to as many people as you can .. start from yahoo meseenger .. search for matching friends .. invite them for talks .. try to gradually open up your discussions .. be selctive and make tests to insure you are talking to a reliable person .. then start to take such relations to reality .. and so on

Answer 11

When i'm feeling scared or unsure of myself i pretend i have an acting job. And that i'm a good actor. I research my part by studying more confident people see how they handle the situation. find out what kind of reactions thier various characters get. Adapt it to my type and what i want, and just pretend you are confident . You have nothing to loose. Remember you are the only one that know's whats going on inside you. They have no idea. They just think your confident.