I found out a woman was after my husband?

Question

and I confronted my husband because he was leading her on without knowing it.

He since told her that he loves me and nothing would become of it. She apologized to him and said to apologize to me. But she never emailed me. He says not realize how it could have been seen as an emotional affair. He told her they could remain friends. He said he didn't think it was that serious. I say that since they were sharing emotions, that was even more dangerous than a physical affair.

I was friends with her too. He went to school with her though. Anyways, without describing the situation or even naming anyone (not even my husband), I posted a blog on forgiveness on my myspace.

She deleted me as a friend. Then deleted my husband. I feel like I had something to worry about,and her deleting us only confirms my suspicions? What do you think?

BTW..she is married too.

I wasn't blogging to get her forgiveness, but to see if others sought out those who they hurt to ask for their forgiveness.

I like myspace!

Answer 1

If she wasn't a close friend, I wouldn't read into it too much. Just let her go.

If there is no great friendship then she may not have felt that the relationship was worth salvaging after such a fiasco. She may not want to be around ya'll because she feels confused/stupid at her behavior and affronted because you called her out. The situation is now between her and herself.

Your husband doesn't seem emotionally attached (or he'd be acting confused and stupid too) so it seems he found an ordinary boundary in marital etiquette when dealing with relationships with the opposite sex.

Answer 2

You hurt her feelings. She knew the blog was about her. People that have a guilty consciencewill try to cover things up and get rid of evidence. Now you are not on her computer as a friend so noone else will know it is her. That is how her mind will rationalize things.
I don't think you have anything to worry about as long as your husband loves you and has no interest in any other woman.
Enjoy what you have with him and don't ponder the what-ifs
from the past.
Take him out to supper:)

Answer 3

Good. You took steps to prevent trouble. Even if your worrys would never have come to pass, you had the sense to act before a crisis developed. Lets give hubby and her the benefit of the doubt. You are wrong. Nothing was going on, nothing would have gone on. Immaterial. You percieved a threat, and took steps to prevent problems. Your husband is probably acting like you were being unreasonable. Tough. What you did actually shows how much he, and your marriage means to you. Your husband is a lucky guy, you seem to be a smart lady.

Answer 4

If she deleted you both maybe she is walking away. If she told your husband to tell you she was sorry why would she need to email you? Men do not like conflict and even though he said they could remain friends it will probably not happen. Men do not pick up on things like this as fast as women do. I would make sure my husband knew how I felt about this person and that I would not be comfortable with them talking or meeting in private.

Answer 5

Your husband really loves you for seeing this was bugging you. On the other hand you might have been wrong about this woman, former friend. It could have been just a close friendship and nothing else. From her reaction it just might have. So she deleted you both from my space. Okay she got mad. Your suspicions are just that, SUSPICIONS.
Your lucky to have a husband that cares about your emotional state and does anything to reassure you of his love.

Answer 6

He is playing stupid! And thats an insult to you. If she deleted you as a friend, than yes probably they had more going on than emotions. Myspace is a joke anyways, you need to get rid of that.

Answer 7

always go with your gut instinct on these things. though, if you feel like you had something to worry about, then bring these emotions up with your husband and share in your feelings on this situation. maybe some things need to be addressed? and these situations are the worse to sweep under the rug for any amount of time.

all in all, in my opinion, it sounds like a terrible miscommunication. she might be missing something in her life that she found in your husband temporarily, she let things escalate in her own mind and she may just be completely embaressed about the whole situation.

Answer 8

i think that emotional cheating is when you say something that you would be unsure of saying in front of your spouse. if she was saying these kinds of things to your husband, then yes. and also confiding in one another, that is emotional cheating to me also. when trying to keep things civil and clean each person should NEVER say anything negative about their spouse, as this is an open door to emotional cheating and if it gets back to that person it causes an argument and then the 2 friends end up "bonding" over that fight. i think that your suspicions were most likely correct, womens intuition----i never doubt it. having her delete both you and your husband like that says "he was never my friend" b/c if he was, she would have said sorry to you herself and she would still be talking to you guys. i think she had an agenda

Answer 9

Your suspicions were confirmed long before that and I would have kicked him in the knee for saying they could still be friends.

Answer 10

With friends like her, who needs enemies? Your better off with out her in your lives anyway, if she would have stayed, she would have caused problems in your marriage.

You don't need to worry bout her any more tho, because your hubby told her straight out that he loves you, not her and it would never go beyond friendship with her.