Don't want the baby to have his last name because he acts like an idiot.Doesn't understand I don't love him. He thinks after the baby is born I'll fall in love with him but I'm not. And has been going to my job and talking trash about me to my co workers. What do you think I should do?
2006-08-04 17:15:32 · 22 answers · asked by Bebee 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
RESTRAINING ORDER
2006-08-12 08:22:14 · answer #1 · answered by ray 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all the baby is his child too right? And even though you say he is an idiot you did marry him so was he an idiot then or did he just turn idiot because you want a divorce. I hate to tell you this but when I was pregnant and divorcing my ex husband we could not get a divorce until after the pregnancy to determine custody and visitation rights. You may not want the baby to have his last name but it's his child too and just because you don't want the baby to have his name. That's wrong. And by law in most states, women who have children with just their boyfriends can't even give the baby the father's last name. You can.. you had a husband ...you may not like him anymore but hey what happened between you and him was between you and the father not the baby,...regardless he is still the childs father. The baby is not even here yet and already you are trying to keep the father out of the child's life don't do that ,don't be one of those mother's who try to use their children like that.. in the end the child will end up just hating you. Not dad... you.. .and the courts may end up taking the child giving him the child if you forbid him of any of his rights. They will see him as the cooperative parent. And you the vendictive one. So do the right thing and grind your teeth and allow the child to have the name put your child first not your feelings for the dad.
2006-08-12 16:42:04 · answer #2 · answered by tinkerbell 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK... so 10 - 15 years from now your child can say "Gee, thanks, Mom, for keeping my Father away from me because you couldn't stand him. By the way, what is his name and are there other relatives I'll never know or will never know me??? Too bad he never had the chance to support me or love me. But, hay, "You Did It Your Way". After all, you didn't love him so why should I.
Think twice about this...revenge and the wrong kind of control can come back and bite you in the a$$!!! Don't let a child grow up thinking his father didn't care. It will affect his life for life. Let you child decide on a relationship with the father.
2006-08-12 06:54:13 · answer #3 · answered by Nunya B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First talk to your lawyer about the situation. The ex should not be going to your work. Get a restraining order for that.
Whether you like it or not, the ex has legal rights concerning the baby. Your lawyer can tell you more about the rights in your state. I would guess that the ex will have rights so the child gets his last name, as well as visitation rights.
2006-08-04 17:20:29 · answer #4 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you are carrying a jerk"s baby does not negate the fact that it is also the jerk's baby. You had better work out something with him in terms of visitation and child support now. This has nothing to do with how you feel (or will feel) about him. Its has everything to do with how well you take care of the baby.
2006-08-12 08:51:34 · answer #5 · answered by onelonevoice 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe get an order of protection if he is stalking you. If you are still legally married when the baby is born you may have to give the baby his last name.
2006-08-12 16:42:04 · answer #6 · answered by debbie w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's ok not to give him his name. You actually fill out a form with the names one he/she is born, you can name him anything. And up until his/hers 1st bday, you can change the name. As for you and your childs sake, go on with out him. Once your child is born, your entire life will change. You will feel love like you never knew existed for your new born. You'll totally know what to do. Best of Luck and Congradulations on your new arrival!!
2006-08-10 18:38:57 · answer #7 · answered by cliffb52 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you had to of loved him for 5 minutes or so, why not now? is it b/c you are stressed? being pregnant can take ALOT out of you. carefully think over the decision, it will be one that will stick with your child forever. maybe you can just be Friends and make it work that way. you WILL want his help when the shortie is born so keep that in mind, whether that be money or visitation, you will want help! if you believe in God pray. if not flip a coin!
2006-08-04 17:25:13 · answer #8 · answered by sixfoot8bkr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fun fact: In some states, you CANNOT be divorced while pregnant. You have to wait until after the delivery.
2006-08-04 17:37:58 · answer #9 · answered by Maureen F 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you don;t have to give the baby the father's last name. use your last name. you are not with the father anyway. i support you.
2006-08-04 17:31:14 · answer #10 · answered by Discovery 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you're still married and took his name the baby will also have the name assuming you're still married at the time of birth and ahven't changed your name. but if the baby's not his then no worries....word.
2006-08-04 17:30:42 · answer #11 · answered by mom_a_Joy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋