My partner is so secretive. So secrective that I've started looking for things to see if I'm being cheated on. When my partner found out that I found some emails and pictures, I was told that I was wrong for trying to find this information. That I was trying to find a way out of our relationship. I know that I'm being cheated on just from the emails, I just don't know how and when it's being done because my partner comes straight home after work, and were always together. Can someone answer this question, because I really want to know if I'm wrong?
2006-08-04 16:14:16 · 9 answers · asked by Good2Go 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
People who have nothing to hide, hide nothing. It is quite possible the affair is taking place at work. The workplace has become the new hot spot for affairs to flourish. Hire a PI to help you, there is a lot they can do to catch this type of thing. If the PI finds nothing, well then isn't that piece of mind worth the money spent. You can possibly go to a marriage counselor with your mind clear and confidant. A spouse should not be secretive or deceptive to their mate. This is an unfair way for someone to expect you to live. That is not to say that there would be no hope if the infidelity turned out to be true. There is just no way to repair the damage in your marriage if your husband has another relationship that all his emotional energy and effort is going to, instead of to you.
2006-08-04 18:49:30 · answer #1 · answered by whostolemyprofile 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't have a level of trust with your partner, then you will think the worst. If your partner doesn't appear to have any time to cheat, then maybe they aren't cheating. You didn't say anything about the emails. If they are of a sensuous nature and have never been acted on, then that is what people like to do. they like to have a "safe" relationship that gives them hope and the feeling of being sexy or being needed. If your partner doesn't want to sit down and talk it over, then you should be worried. Tell you partner that. Let them know that you don't like being worried about them cheating. Let them know if they don't talk it out, then you have no choice but to assume they are cheating. Warning: be prepared to make a decision that might change your life. If you give an ultimatum, the partner may take the worst way out for you. If you can't live with it, then it's best to get it out in the open and end it. Good Luck
2006-08-04 16:23:48 · answer #2 · answered by marks3kids 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all do you know that he is or is it just a assumption? When and if you find out it is true then you should get out as soon as possible, because they will try to tell you that they will never do it again well that is a lie because once a cheater always a cheater. Some Signs to look for is lying to you about where he has been and why, and most of all look in his phone,cell phones have become a major part in the world of cheaters. But First and For Most DO NOT I repeat DO NOT listen to any rumors or anything else anyone tells you unless you have proof because when you assume something and it is wrong then it makes an *** out of u. So call friends are quick to get u to there level of unhappiness, you need to think with your heart as well as your mind when it comes to YOUR marriage. So in closing NO it's not wrong @ all. Like all marriages when you put your trust into your spouse, it's up to him/her to keep that level of trust up not you or I.
2006-08-05 04:35:16 · answer #3 · answered by WhyNotMe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are wrong. If there was nothing going on, he wouldn't have secrets. The best way to know for sure is, you feel it in the pit of your stomache. I know that sounds silly, but it is true. Take it from someone who knows first hand. If you feel it in your stomache then its definitely true. Just keep looking, you'll find the evidence you want. Just be really sure that you want the truth, cause the truth hurts big time.
2006-08-04 16:21:49 · answer #4 · answered by brokenheart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF you know he is cheating on you,then leave.He isn't going to come out and say"yes...and".You are looking for proof,to prove what you already know.It doesn't make sense.I think you need to do what is best for you,If you don't want to be 2nd in your hubby's life(and you shouldn't be)then move on.IF he really loves you and wants to fix it,then he will.But you cannot be his doormat while he decides what to do and when/if to tell you the truth.
2006-08-04 16:36:45 · answer #5 · answered by missyandgordon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you really need to see and hear what your partner isn't saying. I was in this situation and still am in a way. You may want to follow him check to see who he is calling and making sure he is where is says he is. Trust me if you feel like he is cheating he is.
2006-08-04 16:52:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess you need to figure out if you're concerned about him being secretive because you're paranoid or have a justifiable reason. If you're just paranoid, you need to figure out where your insecurities are that are making you so paranoid. If it's justifiable, you should rethink a relationship with someone who is secretive and hiding things from you.
2006-08-04 16:22:05 · answer #7 · answered by ASC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you've found out he is cheating and your still with him...what difference does it make when it's happening?...I always say..follow your instincts...if your gut is telling you that something isn't right...use what you can to prove it to yourself if that's what you need...
2006-08-04 16:20:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you're not wrong! Obviously your suspicions were well-founded. He's just trying to twist it into being YOUR fault, which it is not.
2006-08-04 16:21:21 · answer #9 · answered by beadtheway 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋