How do I get my 12 month old daughter to sleep by herself?

Question

As soon as she feels I'm putting her in her crib she cries horribly so since about 8 months old she has slept in bed with us. Help I don't know what to do. (Stay at home mom).

Answer 1

Try a co-sleeper. You can either buy one, or make one out of her crib by removing one long side, taking off the wheels, adjusting the mattress so that it's the same height as your bed, and attaching it *firmly* to yours with no gap between the mattresses where she could get stuck.

Once you have the co-sleeper in place, put her down *first*, then nurse her to sleep. Most babies don't like being put down!

Answer 2

I would put the crib in your bedroom for a while. If you don't already have a routine down (bath, book, whatever) start one. Every night do it the same way. Put her down and let her cry for maybe 10 minutes at a time, then go comfort her. Give her a T-shirt that has your smell. Then when she's used to sleeping in her crib, move it out into her room. I"m really against crying it out because I think it's cruel to babies and I never used it for my daughter. She was a bad sleeper in the beginning, but I put my foot down and she eventually got the hang of it. At 18 months she started sleeping through the night.... so good luck!

Answer 3

My little niece hates it too when we put her in her crib...unless she's really tired and asleep, then it doesn't bother her....she actually sleeps on the bed with her parents....they have a full bed and a twin bed put together, so she sleeps in the middle with tons of space....if she's taking a nap, and i'm taking care of her, i was told to put pillows around her (giving space of course), because if she feels them, then she won't fall off the bed....her parents see this as a way that she's already sleeping in a bed, and they don't have to go through the "you're not sleeping in a crib anymore, here's your bed" stage so hard anymore....it depends on how you see it....if you really want her in a crib, then you have to train her, as in, you have to let her cry until she falls asleep....pick her up if she cries too much and give her a drink, but put her back again, until she gets used to it.....or it may be that she just doesn't like the high bars...i recommend getting her a little bed and place those little bars around them...my niece has one for the end of the bed...its not too high, but it prevents them from falling off the bed.....

Answer 4

My girls sleep in their own beds. We have a special toy that attaches to the bed rail that plays music or ocean sounds and has fish that bob up and down. We put the baby in her bed. She cries a little, then she turns on her toy and goes to sleep watching the fish bob up and down (it turns off by itself after 5, 10 or 15 minutes depending on the setting). If she is still awake when it turns off she pushes the button and watches some more. We have a rule if she cries for 15 minutes, we go in we comfort her and then we put her back in her bed (awake) then we leave her room. We go in every 15 minutes as long as she is crying. She has a special toy that she likes to carry with her (a very soft doll) and she has a special blanket that was made just for her by her godmother (a quilt). It may take some time for her to get used to the idea of being left in her bed and it may tear you apart inside to let her cry, but if you go in to her and comfort her every 15 minutes (change it up 13, 14, 16) then she won't know when you are going to come in and she will eventually go to sleep in her bed.

Answer 5

I think it's all about separation anxiety for them starting at 12 months so if you keep that in mind and make the separation process more gentle you might have more success. There is no rule that says you have to let her cry it out all night. I read-up on the Ferber method and then used my own modified version. I know it's hard and I don't agree 100% with the Ferber method but I do believe the only way to get them to sleep is to let them cry it out - but you can use shorter intervals and modify it to suit your needs. But I think the key things to remember are to not pick them up at any point and do not bring them in bed with you.

When my daughter cried in the middle of the night I would go in and try to soothe her the best I could without picking her up, I would hug her, rub her back, tell her it was ok, time to go back to sleep, etc...I would stay in there for maybe five minutes and then leave and tell her it was time to go back to sleep. She would continue to cry and I would let her cry it out for 5 minutes and go back and repeat the process. Each time I left I would add two minutes to the time before going back in - so I would go back after 7 min. then 9, 11, etc... It took a total of 15 minutes before she was able to get herself back to sleep. It took about 4 or 5 nights of this, each night taking less time to get her back to sleep and then she was sleeping through the night.

We did go through periods every six months or so when she would have trouble in the middle of the night. We just repeated the process. It took less time to get her back on track and now at three years old she has no problems going to bed or sleeping through the night.

I know some moms that sleep on the floor for a few nights and slowly move their way out. Find what works for you but keep the things I mentioned above in mind.

Good luck.

Answer 6

She sleeps by herself in her crib at nap time, right? From all the hypotheses I've read on the subject, it seems it is best for you to let her cry herself to sleep. It may be upsetting to you at first, but you need to gain control (your baby is controlling you) and in the long run, you will have done the right thing. Good luck, it won't be easy but you can do it.

Answer 7

My first child was a HORRIBLE sleeper. We could get him to sleep, with rocking, nursing, snuggling. BUT....could not for the life of us TRANSITION him from our arms to his bed w/o him waking up and having to start all over again. I thought I was going to lose my mind.

And some babies are like this. Others are not, so there is no fix. You just have to find what works for your son's particular needs. I am opposed to the Cry it out Method. It is too callous of a way to treat a baby IMO.

With my boy, I would rock him, rock, rock rock, till he was WELL asleep. Like 20 minutes into his sleep. Then I would VERY carefully go over to his bed, and as I laid him down, I kept my chest pressed against him. So he felt like he was still 'on me'. I would stay there for 1, 2 or 3 minutes. Until I felt like I had tricked him. Then I would stand back up off of him, but leave my hand on his butt/back, until I felt like he was truly OUT.

I know it sounds really weird, and maybe overboard. But that is how I had to make the transition into his bed possible. He was very aware of himself and his senses were always needing stimulation. So I couldn't just lay him down. I had to do it this way, to make the transition unnoticable.

Good luck to you. I feel your pain! Buy my second child is a dream come true....all I have to do is watch for her tired cues, then lay her in her bed with her blanket, and she does the rest. :o) So many of us have to pay our dues with the first one, then we earn a break on our second one. :o)

Answer 8

oh thats hard u shouldnt did it from the beginning. wait till she go into deep sleep and put her in her crib. good luck

Answer 9

I say enjoy it while it lasts because in 10 years you are going to say "It seems like yesterday you were snuggling close to me in bed sleeping, where did the time go?" and she is going to be wanting her privacy.

Answer 10

my son was 6 before he slept in his bed my daughter is 2 and still gets up and comes gets in bed with me enjoy it while you can they grow up so fast