I meet this guy in yahoo chat and we hit it off, we just knew that it was God that had put us together. He lived 5 hours away from me and after a year of traveling back in fourth we wanted to take it further, he then came here and moved in with me, after the first year he was here he came home one night from drinking and tore into me, I then had to call 911 and he landed in jail for 3 months, after he got out we tried it again, we got into church got counciling and then got married in march of this year, five months later he is at it again, I had to get a epo to get him out of my house and now I have filed for a divorce. He is still here in my home town and living it up, it kills me to know that he is out having a good time drinking and living it up, I love this man but I do have to let go of him and I think of what he may do to the next female he is with. I have found out that he has a record a mile long, this man went as far as getting out butcher knives and threaten me with them.
2006-08-04 12:56:24 · 21 answers · asked by honesty 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Please explain to me how you love someone who got butcher knives out and threatened you with them.
Come on now, don't be as sick as he is. Pull yourself together and see you deserve better. God may have put you together but your husband has chose a path that is not of God. God would not want you to be treated in this manner. If anything, you could use your story to witness to others but you can't stay with this man.
Good luck!
2006-08-04 13:10:51 · answer #1 · answered by Raspberry 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry that you experienced the horror of an abusive relationship and especially that you met him on yahoo's chat......But how can you love someone who abuses you? You don't. And you certainly don't need him.....Use the experience as a learning lesson, take a martial arts class and yoga should help you meditate him out of your thoughts.....It appears that you are independent. Get to know more people in your town, the man for you is somewhere around. Not to worry about him living it up; what goes up must come down.
2006-08-04 13:10:11 · answer #2 · answered by Prudent World 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason why you still love him is that you are not seeing what he really is doing to you. You can talk about it but in reality you can't see beyond that. You love him and that's why you can't seem to get over him. Let him do what he is doing and don't look back. Move on and live a better life. You and no other woman should live like that. This man is sick and needs help. But he needs to seek help on his own.
2006-08-04 13:16:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry but you must be insane. If you married some guy that already spent three months in jail for physical abuse of you, then you must be crazy. What the hell would make you do something like that? It's like marrying someone after discovering they are a heroine addict.
Some people deserve sympathy for getting themselves into unfortunate predicaments, but you pretty much asked for it from day one. How do you expect any kind of sincere sympathy?
2006-08-04 13:22:22 · answer #4 · answered by ZCT 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have done yourself a huge favor by getting him out of your life. I also met my husband online. It's the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life was to marry him. I know exactly where your coming from. You find out they are NOT the person you thought they were. Don't waste your time thinking about him and what he is doing. Just be thankful and move on with your life. You don't deserve to have someone who hurts you in your life. Bless you.
2006-08-04 13:49:31 · answer #5 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know exactly your situation. I was with a guy for nearly 3 years who drank and did drugs, loved his friends more than me and abused me the same way. I always knew he was treating me wrong but I thought he would change even though we are both 30. I held on and on till i realised I was losing my own sanity, I went to the edge before I made the changes I needed. I threw him out, most difficult thing, I also realised that we ourselves teach other people how to treat us, if we allow someone to treat us badly with no consequences, then they will do it again. It took a while for me to get back to me but nearly there and its nice waking in the morning knowing I have no crap to face,
I wish you luck my dear X
2006-08-04 13:32:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so glad that you moved on. You should be so proud of yourself. It is a cycle. You feel like you still love the guy but it is all apart of an abuse cycle. check out www.drirene.com. It is a site about verbal and physical abuse. It will help you understand your emotions and help you become stronger.
2006-08-04 13:24:24 · answer #7 · answered by A M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was there any physical abuse in your family growing up? And are you confusing abuse with love?
Are you familiar with alcoholism? Sounds like he is. You married an abusive alcoholic. Any of THAT in your family. There is a reason you love and are attracted to him, it just didn't happen.
This is a very logical progression. You are trying to change an alcoholic. No can do.
2006-08-04 13:17:43 · answer #8 · answered by brian k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would love someone who wants to hurt you. He is not worth your time. I know it may be more easily said than done but really think about it. He doesn't love you, so why love someone who doesn't care about you. It may be hard at first but you have to move on. Once you do I bet you won't believe how much crap you put up with. If you love yourself you will move on.
2006-08-04 13:03:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you are the one that's needs counseling help not him. you for taking him back. go to the courts and have him removed from your house if you have filed for a divorce. get a restaining order and keep him out. call police tell them what he's done and move on.
2006-08-04 13:18:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋