I want to break up with him, but I am afraid of hurting him. On top of that he has threatened to not see his son if I leave him. What should I say?
2006-08-04 10:14:07 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
if he's threatening you to stay together, that's even more reason to leave him. your son [i'm guessing it's your son, too] can have a strong male role model in his life that's not his biological father. so leaving this guy could actually be a good thing for both of you.don't worry about the guy, let him know the truth and leave.
2006-08-04 10:17:51 · answer #1 · answered by sweeternity2000 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he's using your son as a threat so you won't leave him, I don't think you will actually hurt him if you leave. He'll be angry because he wasn't able to control you, but he won't be hurt.
As for him not being in his son's life ... well, legally, that's not an option because he is financially responsible for that child and will have to pay support until your son is 18.
I grew up in a household of women, and no real male role models. Strangely enough, I'm friends with more guys than gals (and I've been married to the same guy for 19 years). So, I don't buy into the hype that a child needs both parents to grow up normally. Any single GOOD parent can do what it takes to raise a happy, healthy, well-adjusted kid.
2006-08-04 10:22:10 · answer #2 · answered by frankiquilts 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is using a child to keep you two together even though you are not happy. He is a manipulator and his actions can and perhaps will get worse over time. The worst thing you could do is eventually marry a manipulator, which will happen eventually if you stay together. If you want out, go and let him face the consequences of his actions. If you feel threatened by him, get a restraining order and make friends with a local policeman.
2006-08-04 10:22:22 · answer #3 · answered by autumntrist39 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he threatens not to see his son if you leave then tough, leave any ways, just tell him that you are not happy and that you needs to go your separate way. Peace, love and joy and i will carry your hip to court for some child support ok bye.
2006-08-04 10:19:06 · answer #4 · answered by baby_luv 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have no control over his stupid decisions. If you decide to end the relationship, tell him just that. Tell him the relationship is not workign for you any more. If he says he will not see his son any more then simply tell him that that is his choice and his mistake to make. Remind him that he is still his father and will remain part of his life as long as he is willing to be involved.
2006-08-04 10:21:05 · answer #5 · answered by Bingo's Mommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
say "i want to see other people" then take your son and walk away from him. He is only using your son as a way to control you and its working. if he doesnt see his son would that really be so bad? if his controling ways were not there to influence this child? tell your soon to be ex to get over himself and stop trying to make you feel bad because you dont like him anymore.
2006-08-04 10:18:51 · answer #6 · answered by ziggunerin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be honest with him. If he threatens to cut off communication with his son, he is not only hurting his son, but himself. I think that it is a scare tactic to guilt you into staying with him. Life is too short to be with someone who does not make you happy.
2006-08-04 10:18:55 · answer #7 · answered by jtj 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you want to break up. You can't do it without hurting him. As far as not seeing his son, if he feels it is OK to use his son as a bargaining tool, maybe he doesn't deserve to be around him anyway.
2006-08-04 10:18:54 · answer #8 · answered by cucumberlarry1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to leave and explain it makes him look like a bad parent not you.
2006-08-04 10:25:23 · answer #9 · answered by Kenya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well tell hime that things r not working well or something like that try 2 get him 2 relize how much he loves his son
2006-08-04 10:18:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋