I married "young". People discourage me saying I will become a statistic?

Question

I am 23. My husband is 25.

I started dating him when I was 18.

I lived in my own apartment, was paying for my college education and working full time.

We married right before my 22nd birthday.

We went thru a lot of stress that tested our relationship for the first 2.5 years. His family didn't want him to marry me and caused trouble.

We stuck it out, married and now are SO happy. We have more love for each other now than we did 5 years ago.

He is the most beautiful person (inside and out) I have ever known and I am so honored to be his wife and we plan to start a family next year.

People hear my age and they say things like:

I married too young and I am more likely to divorce

When I am 30 I may realize 21/22 was too young to marry

I am naive to think we will be together forever.

I just hear a lot of people bashing young married couples.

Why can’t we be the ones that DO make it?

Answer 1

Don't listen to them. If you love him and he loves you that should be all that matters.

Answer 2

Actually, my pastor says the exact opposite... he says that statistics are BETTER if u are married younger! *but not lived together before marriage, which is exactly as u have done!! i think he said women who marry between ages 22-24, and men between 24-26, have better chances of staying together *becauese* the younger the man is, the easier it is for him to change and grow and learn to do the right thing..whereas someone who is 29+ will start hardening the way he lives, and will be that much harder to adapt to any situation involving a new person. i think if u are happy and love this person and it is a healthy strong relationship, Congratulations!!! DON'T worry about statistics, or what other people say... be happy and thankful u have a wonderful relationship!! im really happy for you.... now i do think some of it is true, that some people aren't responsible enough or marry too early, but that's cuz that particular person is not mature enough... if a man, at whatever age, realizes and understands that marriage is work, but the most rewarding and wonderful kind of work, then he will do it w/ passion and love. but if he is forced because of pregnancy, or for other reasons, yes it is probably less likely to work out. don't worry, just make sure u *both* continue to grow and learn and love eachother, and it will get better the longer it goes!! :)

Answer 3

As Nike says... Just Do It!

It could be other jealousy and envy that it is actually working for you.

What they are going by is that people tend to think they are mature enough at 21+ age to make a decision like getting married. What happens is that many young people are very short-sighted and only see a few years ahead of them. A marriage built up on physical infatuation and socialism is usually the reason for most young couples. They always see it as the only next step. It turns out their goals change as they mature.

Answer 4

there's no reason you can't make it...I married at 20...and we've been together for 6 years....we have had a our share of "stress" as well....and I'm sure there will be more...but we are happy. The next time someone says you will end up being a statistic, proudly proclaim that "I already am. I am one of the smaller percentage of people in this country/world that take marriage, and EVERYTHING that comes with it, SERIOUSLY!" It has nothing to do with age...it's all about mentality!
Good luck and congratulations!

Answer 5

I married my husband my husband when i was 20 (he was 25). We have been together since I was 17. Let me tell you this...we have heard it all ourselves...nevertheless; we are still in love and going on 12 years of marriage. We have been through some tough times and yes, we thought we couldn't make it. But it was in those tough times we decided that we would not let situations destroy us. Neither will we let what society or statistics say discourage us. Honey, you can make it. If that man is worth you spending the majority of your life together, then tune out the doubters. Love your husband. Don't think about what could've been or isn't...Enjoy your marriage...then, now and in the future. It's like a fine wine...it gets better with time!

Answer 6

You can be. I was married at 20. My husband was 19. We are know 27 and 26. We have a wonderful family. We have 2 boys and a girl and no I was not pregnant when we got married.

Answer 7

Don't listen to other people telling you that your not going to make it. I married when I was 21 and just 2 days ago we celebrated our 20 year wedding anniversary. My husband and I are the best of friends and that friendship has grown just like yours over the years. Keep the lines of communication open, keep him interested and always find time to spend together even if its 10 mintes. Go with your head and your heart and don't worry about what other people think. Best of Luck to you.

Answer 8

You guys can make it as long as your commited to one another and the relationship. I was with my fiance since we were 17 (we're 24 now) and heard much of the same thing when we got engaged, but it's up to you to decide what you want with your life. Truthfully, some of it is good advice b'cuz having been with the same person since you were both kids, and growing into adults together, you don't get a chance to experience some aspects of life that you would having been single. But again, that all depends on the person.

Me and my fiance are taking a break right now b'cuz we both realized that NIETHER one of us was ready to give up our carefree lives and become married with children. I can't wait to be his wife and mother to his kids, i just prefer to enjoy this phase in my life right now (my 20s)....

Answer 9

When my parents wanted to get married, a judge refused to marry them. He told them they were too young and the marriage would never work out. So they went to another town and got married. They were married for 33 years when my father passed away. They beat the statistics. Wonder what that first judge thought?

Answer 10

I'M 26 MY HUSBAND IS 31 WE GOT MARRIED 3 YEARS AGO AND YES IT VERY HARD TO MATINEE A MARRIAGE PEOPLE ARE GOING SAY THINGS IF YOU DO BAD OR GOOD THE ONLY THING YOU HAVE TO DO IS BE THERE FOR YOUR HUSBAND I PLAN ON BEING WITH MY HUSBAND FOREVER ALSO WE HAVE BEEN TO GATHER FOR 11 YRS I KNOW ALL ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE SAY BEING THAT I WAS 15 AND HE WAS 21 SO KEEP YOUR HEAD UP BE STRONG AND WE MAKE OUR MARRIAGE LAST KEEP IN TOUCH

Answer 11

Don't listen to the haters. You were an adult when you marry and 23 seems right, anything underl 21 is a huge mistake, but you were at a good age to get married.

Congratulations and good luck.