I asked this before & i didnt get any serious answers. Okay, my best friend lives with a gay guy. Hes been gay since birth. Hes never been with a girl. So, now theyre having sex and he told her he wants a relationship with her and that hes in love with her. I asked him what was up and he says he doesnt know what is going on with himself. hes says he has never felt this way. Im confused. What does this mean?
2006-08-04 05:36:57 · 23 answers · asked by Baby Jack born 4/5/09 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
he always goes to ralleys and he was so gay pride. Does this mean hes not gay??
2006-08-04 05:38:09 · update #1
Big B: Huh??
2006-08-04 05:42:15 · update #2
Please ignore the hate-filled bigot above. Such people can spout all the bible they want, but they certainly aren't 'christians.'
Hmm, this is an interesting one. Perhaps your friend didn't realize he was bi until he (probably surprisingly) found himself attracted to your best friend. [I am assuming he has also had enjoyable sex with men previously.]
As long as they are happy, just be happy for them also.
I never try to figure out why a particular person is attracted to another. You see some odd combinations sometimes! :o)
2006-08-04 05:43:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he's not gay, no longer gay, bi-sexual or however you would like to explain it. But this is not for you decide. While you are his friend, you are not his lover, and therefore, in reality, this is none of your business.
However, if you have to involve yourself with this, consider this: People grow close on several levels, when they permit themselves to, over time. The fact that they are living together has allowed them to see things about their lives that most others are probably not aware of. But saying that he's never been with a girl, while he is with a girl, means that he's not being completely honest.
You think that you're confused? What about him? He seems to be quite confused himself. If you're only friends with him because he was gay, then my heart and pity go out to you. But if you're a true friend to him, then I wouldn't spend so much time concentrating on his sexual orientation, and I would support him and offer help in any way possible to help through this time of turmoil.
Also, there's nothing wrong with being straight and support the GLBT lifestyles, I have marched for and with them, and have many friends and family that follow that lifestyle. I believe that mine is not to judge, but to support and love. Allow him to do what he needs, offer the shoulder to cry and lean on, and hand to pull out of trouble when needed. He'll find his way, and be all the more grateful to you for the support and help when he does.
2006-08-04 12:49:15 · answer #2 · answered by Michael 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, maybe he finds comfort in this girl. Falling in love just happens, you cant not be true to your feelings. You just need to accept him and love him as a great friend. Many women I know were full on lesbian all growing up and then in there 20's tried the traditional thing and had kids and got married, needless to say they are with women again and split marriages. I don't know why people do the things they do. But maybe this is the girl for him? Only time will tell. Just be supportive and open. If your his friend you truly just want him to be happy period.
2006-08-04 12:49:13 · answer #3 · answered by mylife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It means he's bisexual. Good for him...he's got more options. Sexuality is on a continuum with most people being mostly straight or mostly gay. Most of us have at least a little bisexual nature in us but we identify with either gay or straight and label ourselves that way.
As long as everyone has safe sex, both physically and emotionally - then there is nothing wrong with it. If they are happy with each other then let them be happy.
2006-08-04 12:43:55 · answer #4 · answered by Miss. A. Laneous 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it doesn't matter if your gay or straight...maybe we only fall in love with people...He's probably confused but I would be cautious if he wants a relationship it sounds like he's trying to work things out in his own mind and that's not a good place to start a relationship from. Make sure she practices safe sex!
2006-08-04 12:45:20 · answer #5 · answered by jillymack06 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I also think he is "bi-sexual", and it is more common than you think! I am "bi-sexual" which to be frank is a very difficult thing. One might think it would be easy because you can choose one way or the other, not so, at least for me. Truth for me is, I can't choose one or the other, rather I need both. I am seriusoly concerned for this girl. If she lets herself get emotionally attached to this guy it could end in heartache. However, if the kep open and honest with eachother about what he is feeling they might have something. best advice for her "proceed with caution".
2006-08-07 10:20:12 · answer #6 · answered by Petee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess its like this peoples minds change and emotions change I guess you could say he's In love with her anything is possible with love people want to make a connection on more than a sexual level and sounds like they have this here.Be happy for them and try and promote them and up hold thier relationships for the betterment of both. Hope this helped.
2006-08-04 16:29:26 · answer #7 · answered by Lewis R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's probably got some bisexual tendancies. No big deal.
Oh, and to the aidsmonger: you do realize that vastly more straight people have AIDS than gay folks at this point, right?
2006-08-04 12:40:20 · answer #8 · answered by effin drunk 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if could be that he's not gay anymore.
maybe the fact that he lives with her made him realize that he isn't gay I really don't believe that people are born that way they choose to be that way.
if he's been "gay" all his life than he's probably never been with a girl before so now that he has he know it's better in every way.
who know maybe he's bi.
good luck with that.
2006-08-04 12:54:18 · answer #9 · answered by lisvad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but you can't be gay "at birth".
He's obviously making even more depraved choices. You choose whether you want to participate in homosexual activities. You are not born having already made that decision. You can choose whether or not to walk in front of a bus. You can choose whether or not to sleep with someone of the same sex. Period. It's a choice.
2006-08-04 12:41:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋