I'm divorcing and have three boys. People tell me that there will be a lot of people who will want to date me, but I just keep thinking that they will think I'm just out looking for a replacement Dad. I wouldn't be doing that at all, they have a father, but the reality of it is I have to consider my kids in every situation, including that. Will men just assume thats what I'm doing?
2006-08-04 04:51:09 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I dont think so, but they will be a bit touchy about getting to close, cause you will be carrying a ready made family and alot of baggage. However if the guy is a decent guy he will deal with whatever baggage you have and be happy with it!
2006-08-04 04:57:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honestly? Most men will see you as a target. Just divorced, three boys, life turned all upside down.... They'll assume your self esteem has taken a hit. Feeling that you're attractive to other men boosts self esteem, so they'll "feed" your need by telling you that you're attractive. They'll assume you're looking for reassurance, acceptance, love, security... whatever. They will assume you're looking for something. And they'll offer it in return for being close to you. The vast majority of them will not be sincere. They'll offer you what you want in return for what they want; and then... withdraw the offer.
Dating several guys may be good for you, it may not... that's up to you. Finding that you are attractive, particularly sexually, really can boost your self-esteem (and it can actually be a lot of fun). But understand it's unlikely you'll find another true partner until you've gotten your own act together and are no longer vulnerable. Once you're not perceived as a "target", men will be attracted because of who you are. They'll be looking at you as a person, which includes being a mother. And they'll consider carefully if they want to assume the role of a male role model by being with you. They'll know any long term relationship with you would include that. It's assumed.
But don't expect anyone like that for at least a year.
2006-08-04 12:05:24 · answer #2 · answered by antirion 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
step carefully, you should keep your "private" life aside from your kids until it has developed into something more substantia. Not knowing the age of your children, this will dictate , in part, how much you share with them, if at all. If it get serious, some definite guides should be in place for your new partner. Dont jump! There are a lot of good guys out there and a lot that will simply want to conquer. AT times they will look alike. time will reveal most of these. Past history is important....
2006-08-04 13:15:00 · answer #3 · answered by timbother@pacbell.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are plenty of men that are in the same situation as you. They are divorced with kids. Believe it or not, some men like romance, passion, and fun. Not just women. The right man will want you and whatever comes with you.
2006-08-04 12:01:25 · answer #4 · answered by bassmanjohanson 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some will, some won't. just tell them up front that you have kids and you are not looking for a replacement father. The kids have a father
2006-08-04 12:43:39 · answer #5 · answered by southernstranger2000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just let them (whomever u get close to) that the boys already have a dad, but they will be a big role model in their lives. Also u might remind whomever u get involved with that u are a pkg deal
2006-08-04 12:02:31 · answer #6 · answered by fox69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i don't think so. I mean i know a lot of guys willing to date a woman with kids. It is harder for a guy with kids to meet women that will date them. But i know if if was me i wouldn't think that.
2006-08-04 12:02:45 · answer #7 · answered by Widowed dad in michigan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not all men will think your trying to replace thier dad,,,and if he loves you kids won't matter to him. and i'm sure you'll call the shots with the boys.,,,,,good luck,,,,,
2006-08-04 12:24:30 · answer #8 · answered by Rooster 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably
2006-08-04 11:55:19 · answer #9 · answered by bad_bob_69 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ya guys can think that its good to let them know what you want.
2006-08-07 15:20:30 · answer #10 · answered by position28 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋