I have a family reunion to attend sunday and me and my fiance have been fighting over him going I really want him to go but he said that he would'nt feel comfortable there we are only staying saturday night do you think that im over reacting?? Should I just let him stay here we have been together for over a year and he has never met my family other than my parent my family lives in Missouri???
2006-08-04 01:19:38 · 11 answers · asked by Groover_84 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Its an 8 hour drive there and he has ONLY met my parents he is shy to a certain extent his father and brothers are the same way
2006-08-04 01:43:22 · update #1
Hes met your parents thats all he has to meet. dont put pressure on him . Its your reunion you go and enjoy yourself, and respect how he feels. IF you pressure him in to doing something he doesnt want you may lose him. Relationships are about trusting , and respecting each other. You don't have to spend every minute together and do every thing together. Space and independance is important, if he doesnt feel comfortable about it dont get angry as he will still be there when you get back.
2006-08-04 01:30:38 · answer #1 · answered by a mother 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My advice to you is take this as an early warning... My first husband never went anywheres with me or my family... he always had an excuse.. I ended up taking my kids camping, to school activities, family affairs and everywhere else by myself.. I was not about to sit home for the rest of my life.. I made my own way and got involved in school, community and traveled without him... I thought that was ok for 25 years then we got divorced.. I am now with a great man,, that shares everything with me.. we camp, hike, go out to eat, visit people, travel together, and it is like nothing I could ever have imagined.. I really have a soul mate.. My kids are now grown and are so happy for me..
2006-08-04 08:31:41 · answer #2 · answered by clrguard1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's tough isn't it? Does his "wouldn't feel comfortable" ring true? Can he be more specific? It would be hopeful to me, were I in your shoes, if he could say, "I wouldn't feel comfortable because I was taught cohabitation before marriage was sinful" or whatever words or thoughts.
Relationships are best when they are negotiated and this seems to be a very good subject for negotiation. At least each of you need to understand the position of the other. (For me and other guyst, it's tough for a guy to do this and even tougher if he (I) hears, "You shouldn't feel that way." or "You're wrong." or "You don't know what you're talking about."
2006-08-04 08:41:17 · answer #3 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems rather odd that he wouldnt want to meet the family that he is about to be a part of. Once my fiance and I were engaged, we couldnt wait to meet each other's family. Something is definately going on with him, and ya'll should work it out.
2006-08-04 08:33:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is your fiance it is important for him to meet the rest of your family. If he is acting this way before marriage - perhaps a "red flag" -- rethink this carefully and perhaps a loooooooooooong engagement is the answer to see if he really is the one.
2006-08-04 08:25:15 · answer #5 · answered by 'Barn 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is your finance shy or lacking social skills? Have you told him odd stories or your relatives that is making him not want to go. Last are these people going to be invited to your wedding and expected to shower you with gifts?
Tell your finance to get off his *** and make an effort and that this is something you want him to attend with you.
2006-08-04 08:32:47 · answer #6 · answered by Pamela M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would let it be,are you trying to show off or do you have a reason for you wanting him to go? If youre parents know him & youre family thats close that you see alot know him then who cares.
2006-08-04 08:26:59 · answer #7 · answered by Clydesdale 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is scared. I would be. So, I wouldn't push him. Explain that family is very important to you, and that you want your family to meet him. But maybe he would be happier meeting them one at a time.
However, if he has issues about families in general, you may need to re-think your relationship.
2006-08-04 08:33:04 · answer #8 · answered by Delora Gloria 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is your fiance I think it would be important for him to go meet your other family members.
2006-08-04 08:22:51 · answer #9 · answered by ohiostategirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the best chance for him to meet your family. He must go. Maybe you should tell him it will be just this once...
2006-08-04 08:27:09 · answer #10 · answered by *art blest* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋