my man's out of work and it's getting him down .last nite he told me he wants time apart to sort out his life.do i wait for him or what?
2006-08-03 18:41:44 · 11 answers · asked by scarlet b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
yes wait for him for at least a week r so after a week u should call and talk to him
2006-08-03 18:47:14 · answer #1 · answered by tylers baby girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your man feels you will wait for him it will just make him appreciate you less. You will be giving him the message that you don't really value yourself so why should he value you? I would tell him that although I am not closing the door, while we are apart I see myself as single and available and that is a chance he is taking.
Also, I think many men are egoists and don't think about how the person waiting feels. If you allow that attitude don't be surprised if he comes back and disappears 5 years on, when it will be even harder to get over him.
Ask yourself why, in his hour of need he feels the need to get away from you instead of run to you.
2006-08-03 19:49:39 · answer #2 · answered by anne b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At this point of time when your man is feeling down, you should be by his side showing your support to him. Tell him that you are there for him through thick and thin (that is if you really love him deeply). Tell him that both of you can work things out together. Being out of job is not a big deal to cry over. At this time, his ego is at an all time low, thinking that without work he would not be able to look after you. Give him the confidence that both of you can ride out the storm together.
2006-08-03 19:17:07 · answer #3 · answered by Lawrence 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your man... husband or boyfriend?
If he's irresponsible, it could be just an excuse to break up. You've to be cautious about the situation & state of your relationship with him.
On another hand...
A job means alot to a guy who's responsible & committed. By nature, a guy will work on providing security & stability, if he's serious about the relationship. And if he didn't have a job, he will resort to ask you not to wait for him & look for another guy who can take care of you. And it's up to you to decide to wait for him or not. If wait, for how long?
It's inevitable that your man will feel down / depressed. He needs gentle treatment with motivation & encouragement. He also need time & space to sort out his thoughts / feelings / fears / worries.
Men, by nature, want to handle their problems by themselves & will retreat to their personal space to sort them out. Or relieve their stress doing other things & coming back to it when there's solutions.
It depends on the love meter both of you are holding for each other. Are both of you willing to chill out, put a pause, then talk about it later? Pick a time frame. 1 week, 1 month, 2 months, etc.
Most importantly, are you willing to wait for him till he's ready to give you a definite answer to go on or break off? At least, the answer is certain rather than hanging there not knowing the direction of your relationship with him.
Waiting is giving him a chance to find himself & a job. And a chance for your relationship to grow or to stop for good. Not waiting gives you a chance to find others. And he's ok with it.
You've to be okay with your own decision & be prepared for the outcome / consequences of your choice. And move on from there no matter what happens. It's your choice. It's your life.
2006-08-03 19:08:39 · answer #4 · answered by Queenie Tay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men, more than women, define themselves by their work. When they don't have a job, they often think they have lost their identify. Rather than let the woman in their lives help them through this troubling time, they will often simply walk away from the relationship, rather than rely on someone else. It's his problem, not yours.
He sounds like a person who is unable to communicate easily with others. You may have to let him go so he can "find" himself while you get on with your own life.
If you're married, this can be difficult legally. But if you're just living together or in a non-living together relationship, you're probably better off getting out of it because if he refuses to let you help him, chances are, he won't help you if you have a problem.
2006-08-03 18:51:35 · answer #5 · answered by CarolO 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends how close yalls relationship is. If your not too close, then move on. But if your relationship is deep, then he is probably lookin for his "special" someone to confide in. So just tell him you will be here for him no matter what, and you will help him with that ever he needs!
2006-08-03 18:49:26 · answer #6 · answered by Ms. BJ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1
2017-02-16 21:07:07 · answer #7 · answered by bliss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him while he is sorting out his life there are plenty of occupations that require sorting abilities also.
2006-08-03 18:56:58 · answer #8 · answered by ultravezz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he just wanted to get rid of you little by little... then you will no longer miss him and go on with your life without him eventually... that's exactly what I did when i broke up with my gf coz i dont hve the courage to say it personally...i'm not saying that he's like me...just to give you an idea.... hope both of you stays..
2006-08-03 18:55:08 · answer #9 · answered by Mark 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no way ditch him you know ive loved you for ever babe send me your adress and i will come take you away from all the missery xxx
zombie :)
2006-08-07 09:32:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋