My ex and I dated for 3 years but broke up for long distance. I found out recently that he likes guys also. One minute he says he loves me and the next minute I am unsure. I really love him so much and I feel like he is the guy that is gonna marry but now I am a little unsure. Is it stupid to give alot into one guy who isn't sure about his sexuality?? I wish I knew what I could do and I would really appreciate it if someone could help me with this situation. I am suppose to move out to California in 2 years to be with him and risk my whole life, but after finding this thing out, I am scared that I will lose him and end up alone. Is it smart to be with someone who has fooled with someone of the same sex on numerous occasions and goes back and forth between their emotions? He says that we will always be friends no matter what, but no matter how hard we try, we can never be friends and end up together again but how will i know if he decides to marry me and then leaves me for a guy?Help me
2006-08-03 16:05:43 · 14 answers · asked by Babygurl 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I'll put it this way. If he was completely straight and yet wanted to have sexual relationships with other women, would that be any different? Similarly, if he is bi-sexual, even mostly gay, but pledged a monogamous relationship with you, would that be any different?
Personally, it's all about what you and he decide. However, I will mention that being bi-sexual does not mean that he will want to be sexual with someone else, male or female, if he chooses to be exclusive with you. True, you may need to be concerned with STDs, but that would be true regardless of his orientation.
Also, pay no heed to those that argue that he has issues. That's the same load of baloney that demonises the GLBT community in general, and most psychologists will refute that.
2006-08-03 16:32:07 · answer #1 · answered by Ѕємι~Мαđ ŠçїєŋŧιѕТ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you go with him , do not marry him for some time after your settled there. . Things can work out but you have to show him he is the one you want tio be with. When others get married they are in the same boat. It could happen to any one. His feelings are the same for you no matter what. I wish you the best, and think it good you know. before you make a big move. . Who your dealing with. , he is just a guy you love. Pem
2006-08-03 23:16:49 · answer #2 · answered by Patricia M 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is not smart to continue a relationship with him.
You won't be alone. You need to first learn how to enjoy things you like (cooking, running, dancing, biking, taking classes) so you're not needy for someone external to make you happy. You need to have a network of friendships you've cultivated. Lastly, you will be able to find the right person for you who won't give you such questions to ask of yourself. Don't settle. Be confident you can do better. Be confident you are making the right decision to break things off with someone who hasn't been honest with you.
2006-08-03 23:12:14 · answer #3 · answered by Tony T 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
NO!!! u definitely should not stay with him!!! For one thing if he's messing around with guys there is a better chance that you could get AIDS or who knows what. Also you should have a huge problem with having sex with a guy who ***** other guys. I mean don't you find that sickening?
2006-08-03 23:46:55 · answer #4 · answered by Lindsay 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have myself been in this situation. Not fun. but all I can tell you is what happened with me. He ended up cheating on me by going to places and sleeping with men he did not even know taking a risk all the time of getting something. If your not sure then it is most likly not right for you.
2006-08-03 23:12:02 · answer #5 · answered by little45 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You've built him up to be your whole life, which is the problem. Most relationships don't work out, for whatever reason, and if this one doesn't, you won't be alone, although I know it feels like you will. Myself, I write it off as a learning experience. To me, he is using you as to convince himself that he is not gay.
2006-08-03 23:12:52 · answer #6 · answered by E-Lo 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to decide if this is something that you can accept or not. If he is bi-sexual, he will never be completly satisfied with only you. You also have to wonder what other secrets is he keeping from you?
2006-08-03 23:13:57 · answer #7 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
um if he is bi then he likes girls too so give it a chance with two guys or something u might like it lol but if u love him dont give up
2006-08-03 23:09:37 · answer #8 · answered by Jessica S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uh, why would you want to touch a guy who likes the same things that you do? Come on woman, get a grip.
2006-08-03 23:11:41 · answer #9 · answered by teacher1969 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Cut your losses now.. the risk of disease is too great, I would never be able to trust someone that is attracted to both sexes.
2006-08-03 23:11:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋