First off, I admit I was snooping around with his computer - I saw that he had accounts with certain matchmaking & friend-finder sites. I know he is active on there because it is in the history/cache. I love my boyfriend but I no longer trust him. I am pretty much living on edge since I found out... and I don't know what to do. I confronted him about it, but he pretty much denied that he was even looking for anyone. He reassures me that he loves me and only me. What would you do if you were in my shoes??? Oh, if age matters, we are in our early 30's.Please help!
2006-08-03 12:52:57 · 13 answers · asked by missconceived 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
He's probably bored with the relationship and using online dating as entertainment. At least he's not out physically cheating on you. This is probably a sign that the relationship is going downhill... however, he might just be having a little fun... sort of like flirting with someone at the office who you would never actually cheat with. We all need a little leeway here and there. If he knew about every guy you flirted with or had a crush on, he'd probably be incredibly jealous too... but you probably don't feel like you're doing anything wrong, because you're not.
Tell him he has to be honest about his intentions or there is no chance that you'll continue putting up with him.
2006-08-03 13:22:43 · answer #1 · answered by Summer 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I'm sure it feels like a betrayal. I would take it that way. But if it makes you really look at where your relationship is going, that could be a good thing. Do you feel like he's stringing you along? Does he feel he has to lie to avoid conflict? That can come out in passive-aggressive ways, like web flirting. Are you perhaps too uptight or controlling yourself? Maybe you need counseling to help you find the root of your insecurities (just a guess). If you didn't find pornography on his computer, you must realize some women have it worse. I think you maybe need a week alone to step back from all this and develop perspective. Good luck, honey.
2006-08-03 20:03:50 · answer #2 · answered by Singlemomof10 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, 1st off how long has he been active? month, 3 - 4- a yr, since b4 or after you two met? i met my SO on HON, and my profile is still there. i go there to say hey to old friends too. see how theyre doing. i have old ones i never used signed up to help others get "credits" for signups. no biggie, if you trust him let it go. guys do weird sh*t, it doesnt mean anything. if you don't trust him, find out why "you" dont. being on another site or talking to gurls is not a reason why. then again, if you dont trust him you dont. either deal with your feelings together as a cpl or move on.
2006-08-03 19:56:57 · answer #3 · answered by Mr Spock 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would ask him where he sees this relationship going in the future. If he is looking elsewhere for maybe a backup plan maybe this relationship just wasn't meant to be. I know that if I was in your situation I would end it there are plenty of other great men in this world who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. But I'm not telling you to break up with him you need to talk with him and then see what you feel in your heart... try to figure out if you are wasting your time in this relationship or if he could be the one.
2006-08-03 20:02:42 · answer #4 · answered by Ashlee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's at least toying around with the idea of looking if he isn't already looking. If it were me I'd find another guy. Ultimately, that's a decision you have to make. Eventually he's either going to stop looking around or he'll date two of you or he'll break up with you. You have to figure out which one of those you want to take a chance on.
2006-08-03 20:01:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
when you snoop around you find things. what you found isn't hard evidence of nothing except the man knows how to use the internet.
a relationship is on the path for failure once trust is removed. either believe him or let the relationship go.
2006-08-03 20:05:30 · answer #6 · answered by toolu24 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try to accept that fact that while HE might be significant to ME, I am obviously NOT significant to HIM... Sorry.. but once trust is gone, earning it back is a long, tough road. If you're not trusting before any type of commitment, THIS is the red flag that you might not be overly wise to MAKE a commitment... y'know?
2006-08-03 20:02:06 · answer #7 · answered by Amy S 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay, I hope you can see through his bullshi$%
If he really loved you he would have no interest on match-making sites! Honey, I would ditch him quick because some guys wait till they find someone else......then they'll mysteriously push you to the curb.
I HOPE IM WRONG and you dont end up hurt
2006-08-03 20:26:51 · answer #8 · answered by maggi r 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is definitely up to no good. I'd be very cautious with him. He is not being honest with you. Ask him if he still want s to be with you and why he would sign up for the dating sites.
2006-08-03 19:58:20 · answer #9 · answered by charmed one 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is telling the truth. Tell him to remove the profiles he has online.
2006-08-03 19:58:14 · answer #10 · answered by nonono12345 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋