How do u deal with a friend real close to u that cuts the hell out of herself once in a while?????????????????

Question

my best friend used to cut her arms up everywhere but she quick after i kept telling her that it doesnt change her situation , it doesnt let her anger out because she would be mad still after she cut herself, ive talked to her about it, ive did almost everything i need to do, i just cant find out what else is left for me to do. almost everything isnt enough, i care about her but i get so mad at her. she knows that cuting herself just leaves nothing but a hole in her arm and alot of blood to clean up.what the hell is there left for me to do?? i know there is something. and just rite now i got a call from her and do u know what she ****** told me?? that she cut herself and i wont stop bleeding. shes coming over rite now because i told her i wanteed to talk to her about a lot of things. i just dont know how to word it.

wait people i forgot to mention this part.

okay... she lives with her father nad lil brother in the middle of nowhere and she hates it. her mother is a crackhead and lives with her husband about 2 hours away and she doesnt care about her daughter. her father doesnt care much either bcuz his wife left him for bullshit and a husband that beats her, and my friends father feels like he should treat his daughter with the respect that he gets from her mother. he took her to get medicine and she just pops them. they dont have medicare or any of that ****. but his insurance pays for half. he put her in a hospital for cutting herself and her problems only because the aurther center requested it and he would get in trouble if he didnt sign her in to it for a few weeks. she was there for like a week at the most and it costed her dad $2,500 and he blamed her for him not having any money since he owes it to the hospital or he would get put in jail for not paying what he owes.

medicine doesnt work for anyone if your counsler decides for u what u need to take and says that it isnt up to her to change it, in which it actualy is. seeings how i see one. and also he told her that if she keeps telling him that it aint working, (thats y she pops them), he would only increase the dose. medicines dont always work for everyone. people need different things for different problems

Answer 1

Just spill everything, tell her exactly how you feel ... even though you've told her once, tell her again ... tell her you luv her like a sister and if anything ever happened to her you'd die!!! Talk to her about seeing someone about getting help, or try to find some other ways she can deal with the anger/stress. My best friend cut herself over a bunch of stuff, and I'd talk to her and talk to her but nothing seemed to phase her, so one day I just spilled everything, she's like a sister to me, and I don't know what I'd do without her!!!! I tried to help her find other ways to deal w/ her anger, one way was to use a rubber band, put it on her wrist ... every time she got mad she'd flick it, and then she quit cutting herself and then she stopped using the rubber band b/c it hurt. If you feel that you need to tell someone then do it, b/c if you don't then you could regret it for the rest of your life if something happened to her, I know I would've regretted not telling someone if my best friend had accidentally cut a little to deep! Hope this helped!

Answer 2

Well when did you get your psychology degree? If you haven't then you aren't qualified to help her, this girl has serious issues that you aren't and shouldn't attempt to deal with. Yes you are a good friend but she needs help, the best thing for you to do is tell her parents so they can get her the help she needs. She is screwed up, she might be mad at you for a while, but after she gets the help she needs she'll realize that what you did was actually give her a shot at having a descent life. Untreated this will just get worse. How to word it, you tell her she needs help and if that if she doesn't do something about getting some professional help you will because you care about her that much. It needs to be determined by a professional if she is really sick OR if she does this just to be a drama queen and keep you tripping all over yourself to baby her which in itself is a sickness, just a different kind.

Answer 3

Be understanding and ask her to tell you. Ask her to confide in you. I know her situation. You don't tell anyone anything, and you keep the sorrow and pain in you, and you start cutting because physical pain overtakes the emotional one for a brief second, and you keep going because that's the only way you can let it out. It doesn't solve anything in the long run, it probably makes it worse (it did for me), but it solves the immediate present.

Please understand that you getting angry at her will not solve anything, rather it will make her have a worse image of herself because now she is so useless that she is annoying you. Be understanding and always kind even when you want to smack the crap out of her. It's not easy being a friend like you, although I'm sure she appreciates it more than you will ever know.

She needs to confide, because she can't keep the anger inside of her. That is your ultimate goal. You could try to reason with her (may not always work), or logic with her (may not always work). But just hear her out, and try to understand her point of view (put yourself in her shoes). There's a reason she's doing this b/c she's not stupid. Find out what the reason is.

Hope it helps. I'm typing as fast as I can so you can read this before she gets to your place.

And I disagree with the others. When I went to a shrink, I wasn't ready, and I could not handle voicing all of the bad realizations I had in my head. It was a hell of a lot easier to tell my best friend.

Answer 4

Even though you are her best friend, your duty is not to help her yourself because you can't. Regardless of what she says to you she has a mental problem and a serious one. Cutters as they are called need psychiatric professional help and can be helped. So talk to your parents or her parents. Don't think you are betraying her by doing this. You are saving her life. Don't talk to her about it because in this situation your words will mean nothing and just serve to make her more upset - this is beyond her control and yours and so you must find her professional help - tell her older brother or sister, tell your parents or tell her parents - but it is the only way and if you are her best friend, you must do this. Good luck.

Answer 5

Cutting ones self is a mental health issue. She needs to see a counselor. There is nothing you can say or do that will make her stop.

She needs professional help, You need to get her family involved she may get mad at you but she will appreciate it in the long run

Answer 6

I HAVE been that girl.. I used to try oding and many stupid stunts.. you know what woke me up.. cause I did it for years... One day I called my friend said I slit my wrists.... They called 911.. Wow the realization of how serious I was scaring people finally set in.. noone could have made me get the help I didnt think I needed.. but the hospital MADE me listen and made me stay till I wasnt a danger to myself.. this is a problem YOU aren't equiped to handle.. and your friend wont stop because right now.. you are giving her what she needs... Dont stop being her friend.. BUT CALL (!! seriously.. IT IS WHAT SAVED MY LIFE.. and I love my friend for loving me that much... and do you know.. this becomes addictive I dont know why.. but it is dont expect her to stop on her own cause it is probally beyond her control

Answer 7

I knew a few people like this. They do it because it gets them attention. Personally, I speak my mind to people, say exactly what I'm thinking. I told them this is not the way to get attention, and to grow up. It's very harsh but they need to understand in the process of attracting attention to themselves, they look like nutcases and may be put away for it. Nobody wants to go to a psychiatric ward.

Answer 8

Everyone finds a remedy for their pain. She feels better about herself when she cuts. I understand your situation and I dont like it when ppl cut themselves but thats her remedy. She cuts herself to see if she still feels. If ppl are hurting on the inside, why would they want to hurt on the outside as well? I never understood but many tell me that they do it because it helps them get over things. Weird huh?

Answer 9

A true best friend would get her some help. You need to sit her down and tell her your concerns. Like it's not healthy to cut. She needs some REAL help. You need to look up local support groups, and try to encourage her to express her feelings in a more healthy and appropriate manner!

Answer 10

just keep trying to talk to her about it.it's serious i should know i used to cut my self all the time i when i was mad about something,but one day i realized it wouldn't get me any where so i talked to my doctor and he said i was depressed. i felt so imberessd but i had to do it, so that i could keep on living for my kids... if you've tried everything then call a crisis hotline.my parents told me that they had called before and it helped them understand my situation...good luck and i hope every thing goes well......