My wife's friend and I?

Question

We had sex with my wifes permission. Real weird huh, so this woman asked me if I was willing to see her for some fun now and then. I said no, now I see why my wife wanted me to have this woman. She had been cheating for over a year before I had her friend,I asked this gal if she knew that my wife was screwing around and she denied it. She said this was all in some sexual fun for her and was angry at my wife for putting us in this situation. I miss our friendship that we had. We were all good friends that let things get out of control. I want her back, for friend and lover,I want to hurt my wife letting her seeing us together having fun again. I want to divorce her and live my life with this girl. Is this abad way to go about it. My wife ruined everything we had and I am sick over it.

Answer 1

Your wife has been screwing around on you and then says it's okay to have sex with her freind....Your wife needs therapy but not to worry...She got you involved sexually with her freind so why not continue a relationship with this woman..and tell your wife hey you started it all

Answer 2

For one, you made the choice to sleep with the wife's friend. No person could force you to do it. Second, the idea of adding another person into a sexual relationship is alluring, but once acted upon often brings the relationship to a screeching hault. You had no more respect for your marriage vows than she does. When you allowed yourself to become involved with another woman sexually, you threw out the whole marriage sanctity. You seem to be more bitter because your wife followed your lead and continued to have relationships outside of marriage. You need to move on and realize you both had a hand in ruining everything. You have to take responsibility for your actions and stop blaming everything on your wife. As far as trying to hurt your wife, that is extremely immature and stupid. If she offered this woman to you in the first place, what on earth makes you think she's going to give a darn if you continue to see her? I think you'd only be falling right into her plan to make you be the "bad guy" and hence make you responsible for ruining everything. Anyway, now that I've gone in enough circles to confuse myself, you need to decide if you are wanting to reconcile your marriage and see if your wife would be willing to join you in couseling. If you don't, I would still suggest counseling for you as you work on getting divorced, as that would be the last option available.

Good luck.

Answer 3

You did a no no. Never ever go to bed just to please you wife. She must be doing it on the side, so feels you can too, but with some one she knows. Sorry this could break up all 3 of you. Tell your wife if she don't quit running around you are getting a divorce. It might be a good idea to tell you other friend that you can't see her for a while. Till you find out what is what with your wife, Pem

Answer 4

This is a tough situation, you should have known you wife was cheating when she wanted to allow you to have sex with her friend. Think about it if your wife wanted to have sex with your friend and asked you would you allow her? Then on another note I understand you want to hurt your wife because she hurt you but two wrongs don't make a right and if you don't think that you and her will make it through this situation then maybe you just need to be separated for a while. You and your wife need to sit down and talk about why she did it and whom she did it with and if she is going to continue to do it. Because if she is going to continue then you and her relationship has to be over. Sorry about it all and I hope that you and her work something out.

Answer 5

you sound like you are in a bit of a messy situation, sorry to hear it.l hope that you don't want to get with the friend, just to pee your wife off.,because it's more than likely that , that relationship won't work either, if that is the case.It sounds like you all need a bit of breathing space from the situation.Once you have done this, see how you really feel then.You should have known something was up, when your wife said it was o.k to sleep with her friend. l am sorry you had to learn a lesson this way.l hope everything works out for you.

Answer 6

It was your choice and you shouldn't have done it but what's in the past is in the past. I would recommend marriage counseling first before the divorce and if that doesn't work, I would understand you wanting a divorce. I wouldn't get with the other girl just for spite though. You may eventually find that you really don't care about her and then find yourself in another rough situation.

Answer 7

I think you have the right to leave your wife. She definitely put you in a very akward position. Its time to let her go. I'm assuming you don't love her anymore. You can leave and not feel guilty.

Answer 8

SOUNDS AS IF YOU REALLY DIDN'T LOVE YOUR WIFE ANY WAY OR YOU WOULDN'T BE SLEEPING W/FRIENDS. IF YOU REALLY WANT TO BE W/ THIS FRIEND AND SHE FEELS THE SAME THEN GO FOR IT, NOT TO GET BACK AT YOUR WIFE THAT WOULD BE SINKING PRETTY LOW. (NOT THAT YOUR WIFE WOULD CARE IF SHE IS SCREWING AROUND ANYWAY).

Answer 9

divorce your wife and move on with the new girl, period.
why get back at your wife? the sooner you put it all behind you the sooner you will be happy again.

Answer 10

but you are not over your wife or you wouldnt want to hurt her like you are hurting good luck i hope you can work through it together and hope you come to a agreement that works for both of you