i want to go and stay at my friends house tonight and i aked my man if its ok and he said yes. but hes refusing to look aftrer our son saying i should take him with me but what fun is a gurls night with a baby.hes trying to sabotage me going out and having a life and i dont know what to do. now hes angry cos i called him a control frek.what would u do?
2006-08-03 11:40:56 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
you want to go out.... he doesn't want to ook after the kid so its simple... either you get a sitter to mind the baby... or you take the baby with you... or you stay home with your man...
the b/f can only have the control you let him have...
2006-08-03 12:15:22 · answer #1 · answered by wollemi_pine_writer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should grow up and accept his share of the parent responsabilities.I have a girl I have been with her for five years and if she wants to go out I stay home and look after the step kids.I agree with you that he is trying to control you but some guys are just to scared these days that if their girlfriend or wife goes out with the girls that she may not come back.if he tries to show you a little more trust then he wouldn't have these insecurities.If he is not willing to help let you have a good night out with your friends then try and see if your parents or his will help with the babysitting as most grandparents would jump at the chance of having their grandchildren over night show him that you can take charge and that you don't need his help to organise a night out for yourself.The time he misses with his child is time he will never get back his loss not yours.
2006-08-03 11:58:29 · answer #2 · answered by flying_eagle_72 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like u are a little kid in ur mind. going out with friends is what 14 year olds do. u had the kid and now u need to take care of him also u have a husband u need to be with. my wife has never been away from home except when she was in the hospital having our kids. u need to grow up and love ur man not ur chick friends. if my wife wanted to go spend the night with someone i would figure shes gona get laid with some new bf. i would dump her like a load of bricks and i hope ur man is the same way.
2006-08-03 11:52:43 · answer #3 · answered by wrecker boy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Over night sleep overs are for teenagers. Find a sitter and take your man to a hotel or out on the town you and your girls can have lunch or coffee you don't need to stay over at her house when you got a man and a child.
2006-08-03 11:58:14 · answer #4 · answered by deadlymommy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen...if he is the father of that boy then he is just as responsible for taking care of him as you are. Every mom needs time away from the family once in awhile so she can re-energize and be there for her loved ones when they need her. You can't drive a car without gas right? You have to fill it up every so often and the same applies to our mental health. When we are on "empty" we need to refuel so if your "man" will not look after your son then I suggest you find someone else to do so and I say that's it time to re-examine your relationship with this guy.
You should NEVER have to ask permission from a spouse to go do something...that's what a child does with a parent. An adult relationship needs to be about compromise if it is to work and flourish. Next time just simply tell him that you are going to do this on this day and allow him to have quality time with his son because after all, your son needs this one on one with dad too.
Do not back down on this because if you do, then it will be harder next time (if not impossible) for you to go away again. Do not let yourself be manipulated. Stand strong. And yes I agree with you, he is trying to control you and will do so if you let him. It's up to you so take back your power.
Best to you.
2006-08-03 11:55:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a son now. Although you should go out everynow and then but it cannot be of any sort of frequency. Your son is your new priority. He shouldnt be sabotaging you though. Tell him its not going to be a habit and to be ok with this single break from dealing with your son.
2006-08-03 12:02:35 · answer #6 · answered by omsuperhoops 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is an old trick... yes you can go out, but if you go out, he wants to go out too, so because you asked first you get to find a babysitter....
p.s. I'd be checking where he is planning on spending the night ;)
2006-08-03 11:48:32 · answer #7 · answered by Reverand Ray 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What Amanda M said! Havin A baby slows your roll all together.
2006-08-03 11:48:07 · answer #8 · answered by jason m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you cant go out and enjoy urself your son is your life now.. if you wanted a life you should have though b4 you had a child
2006-08-03 11:46:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋