Can men and women really be friends, after the age of 21?

Question

Recent studies show that men and women who claim to be friends after the age of 21 either have had sexual relations in the period of friendship, or the friendship ended after discovering nothing was ever going to happen.

I thought I would test that theory and ask all of you….. Can men and women really be life long friends ?

I will ask this question again in the near future for other responses as well. If your also interested in the replies, check back.

Thank you very much, I appreciate the responses.

Answer 1

The Answer is NO! Men and Women can NOT be just friends, and only friends. Other relationships will come between the friendship, as well as other things.

I read the same study (I think) and it clearly points out that men and women become friends to fill a void, once the void is filled the friendship will begin to disparate.

The ONLY way men and women could be friends and only friends is if it is a Internet or telephone friendship, or if it is a friendship developed from a pen pal in prison or any other wall dividing the two, making it well known that any thing romantic or sexual can and will never happen.

I do appreciate your question, and find it rather intelligent, I also find the fact that you keep your self updated on fact and statistic rather appealing.

Answer 2

If there is open communication between men and women that is the first step in building trust.

In this world, we seem to have so many friendships with people but far few genuine friendships.

When you have a trust with another person, that will eventually lead to a friendship and then a genuine friendship too. Genuine friendships are better because your not used for what you have or don't have and the other person only wants you to be happy and have the very best no matter what. With a genuine friendship both people can grow both as individuals in their intellect and as a couple too. Growth in a relationship is great, especially when you are friends first.

Think about it. Whenever a couple gets married and stays married for a long time, they have to work things out on many different occasions. Each has a point of view of a topic and each listens to the other without judgement. They talk it out. They communicate. They respect each other's opinion and they see the other's point of view too, when it is needed. It isn't always easy, but yes, they do that in a big way. Their genuine friendship helps keep it together too, because they can only see the growth in the other person and that is a positive, definitely.

After you have a friendship, you also want to share your life and your values with that person too. Honesty, Trust, Respect, Caring, Sharing, Appreciation, A Sense of Humor, and Unconditional Love are where it's at. Most will agree and also have many values of their own as well.

So, Yes, men and women can be friends. It is not limited to age either. No matter how young or older you are. 21 or not. We definitely need them if we want a relationship with another member of the opposite sex and that only adds to the spice of life.

Answer 3

The answer to that question is fully dependent upon the two people involved. Yes, there are men and women who can be life long friends and nothing else. These people are usually simply not attracted to each other for some reason but still connect on a certain level. As for the majority of cases I would say no, unless they are just the hi and bye, see you around type. Most men and women will at some point in any close friendship find themselves questioning if this other person could be more than just a friend. Once that happens it is very hard to ever think of that person as just a friend. At that point something has to either eventually happen and they explore the possibility of more than just friends or they gradually go their separate ways.

Answer 4

Actually every one is right and wrong. Being a police officer we see and hear many, many things.

first, men and women can be the best of friends, but it is always altered in the end. Rather it be a jealous ex, Sex, or a dispute, the friendship will end, or become an acquaintance more then a friendship.

Second, their is always a misunderstanding, one likes the other but the other has absolutely no idea, and does not share the same feelings.

third, It is more likely that a friendship develop from a young age and last in to adult hood rather then trying to be friends after reaching adulthood. This plays a huge factor. The guy that says he desires nothing from his female friends is a prime example. What he don’t know, and what she will never say, cant hurt the friendship.

Truth be known, and never admitted….. Any one that likes to play with people, or enjoys them a lot will certainly tell you that it is possible and ok, and those who have tried it, will tell you, no it’s not possible.
I want to assure you that it is only possible in very small cases and I do mean small cases.

FYI: it is a good legit question, and perhaps we will see more questions like this. Now if we can only get bad guys to ask if it is ok to commit burglary.

Answer 5

A true friend is one with whom you can share all. A true friendship is undoubtedly the closest relationship outside of marriage. A male-female friendship by the very nature of true friendship, will therefore, always evolve into a sexual situation. Whether or not the act is consumated is totally dependent on the emotions of the moment. The challenge is to then learn if the friendship can tolerate the intimacy, and continue as only friends! Doubtful!!, I can honestly say, been there, done that, and I really miss her friendship!

Answer 6

It is very difficult for a "friendly" relationship to occur past the age of 21 with members of the opposite sex. That is why as it is stated that "proximity breeds attention and/or infidelity". This is a basic pysch course teaching. It's like when you first meet someone of the opposite sex and you do not find them attractive but after being in their company for a while you start to look at them differently. This is one reason why so many affairs occur at the workplace as some people spend more time with their co-workers then with their mates.

II do have some female acquaintances; however, I do not believe that any of them would be placed into the "friend" category.

Interesting question however and I look forward to reading other responses.

Answer 7

i think that it is very possible for men and women to be just friends i got a lot of friends that i have never had sexual relations with that are male and over 21 and i am female and damned near 27 so yes it is very possible as long as the rules are laid out before the friendship begins.

Answer 8

Yes, for a short time. Then as many others have already said, one or both begin to have sexual thoughts & / or feelings. Unfortunately, if unanswered, they tend to grow apart, as they find other "mates".

The friendship grew strong to fill a void to begin with & eventually that void or need fades or goes away all together.

I am female & I have had many male friends, but it always seems to fall by the wayside, as they either hit on me & we have to have the "we can only be friends" talk or they hook up with someone & she doesn't want them hanging out with another female anymore.

Gay men make the best friends, there is no jealousy, competition & they help you with things & never ask for sexual favors. Right-On gay men !!!!!

Answer 9

It is not too difficult to do it.
Your body is a channel for energies like wanting to be with the females your around because of the sense's beauty of the smell of a women that turns a males hormones on.

You need to stop being a channel for those energies that you do not want to be toward a friend... and this would be a big challenge...in a males life maybe the hardest thing he would ever challenge.

The chance of sitting with a female companion late at night time after time in a lightly lite room.

With no one to disturb you both there a great chance them energy emotions will "not" be held back.

For we have this chill that comes over our bodies... this heart throb... this feeling... that comes all over us and we love to release them feelings.

Sexually...hugging ...kisses ...to or deepest desire is unleashed to be closer then friends.

I do believe that any male would not be telling the... truth if he said different.

{ # 10 points for this answer... the only way I would won't it is being truthfully not hiding behind the truth to be someone I'm not }.

ICHOOSETOTELLTHETRUTH

Answer 10

I have many male friends and I am 34. The men I am friends with started out as us hanging in a group of females and males. After some time, the friendship turned to a family-like relationship where respect grew. Last year I did get hit on by a gentlemen who I was not attracted to. I explained my feelings (or lack of them) and he still remained friends with me even to this day.