Want serious input from the ladies.....?

Question

I am a decent boy-next-door-looking 22 year old guy. I can be funny if I know you, but am low key and quiet by nature....kinda bookish. Because of this, most of my girlfriends have been out-going and talkative. Most have really picked me up, rather than me picking them. A couple months ago, a friend told me about this episode of 20/20 where some guy claimed that women--dispite the lies they say in public, and to themselves--are attracted to aggressive, confident jerks. He showed that if you are confident, women will even gravitate to men who put them down. I watched the show on my friend's DVR. Afterwards, I spent several weeks pushing myself to be super outgoing and test out the theory. At first to my delight, and then to my disgust, I found it worked. Even if all I did was brag about myself, or be mildly insulting to a female, being hyper masculine and super confident worked. But now it's really saddened me. I want to pull honeys, but respect them too. Please help me understand.

Answer 1

BE. YOUR. SELF.

Do NOT try and be someone you are not, because eventually, people will see through it, or you'll get a great girl who will dump you when you finally explain who you REALLY are.

If the girl only goes for someone who puts her down, you don't want her anyway.

Be yourself and be patient, dear. And good luck!

Answer 2

I think all humans gravitate towards confidence and most people like a challenge. The worst thing you can walk away from this doing is becoming a jerk. Be confident but also treat her well. It will all work out with the right girl.

Answer 3

Unfortunately, I don't know how to explain the confident thing! I personally LOVE confident men and will put up with more from them than any other type..Partly because you feel safe with a confident guy because you know he won't put up with someone walking all over him or you. I guess I like a challenge too! However, I don't like men who brag about anything..I think you can be masculine and confident without being a braggert. Good luck!!

Answer 4

You can be confident, but still sweet, you know. No need to put down women at all. I personally don't mind a little bragging (key word being a *little*), but a girl wants to know that you're into her at least as much as you're into yourself, otherwise it's a turn-off. My ex-boyfriend was very good-looking and conceited, but because he made me feel undesirable (mostly about how I was too skinny...I have since reached a healthy weight), I wasn't attracted to him. My husband is always telling me I'm beautiful, and that makes me want him. You just need to keep it balanced. Some women *are* attracted to "bad boys". I've been guilty of that on occasion, but I wouldn't consider being involved with one. I imagine they're a lot more fun to flirt with than to be with...

Answer 5

hi Alex, Take what surpassed off in the previous as an journey and start up finding forward. you have no longer stated why they broke off the relationship. There must be a reason of the ruin on your relationships. study that and refrain from doing the comparable. relationship is all approximately believe, each and every thing, no be counted how undesirable occurs for the main suitable. you purely gotta %. your self up and shop on going. on the age of 20, you're nonetheless too youthful to come again to a decision the style of female you go with for. Your concepts and flavor will exchange with the aid of the years as you mature into adulthood. Take it user-friendly and slow, make acquaintances with females and artwork your way from there. i could say that 25 or 26 may be the perfect age. As for self assurance, be your self... you go with for human beings to love you for who you're and not what you're. Dont post pretences and you ought to be tender on your man or woman epidermis. communication smart, communicate approximately prevalent subjects that the two one among you relish. Dont enable or no longer that's one sided or brag approximately your self. enable the communication flow. Get to appreciate concerning to the lady you're with, this will provide you a concept approximately her flavor and concepts. Then, you purely take it from there.

Answer 6

It's the type of girl you like and want should be the ones that you respect and be yourself with not put on a show. Man i which you were around at my age 20 years ago. Be yourself and you will hind the right person for you.

Answer 7

dude i know i'm not a chick but from my experiance it's not the puting them down and they want you more theory. to me it's the confidence people can tell if you are or you aren't. the way that you carry your self and beleave that you can go out there and get the girl thats what i think is ment by the little study they did. i am just like you shy by nature but once realized that if i want the girl you have to already have the girl pyscologically and no i don't mean go read up on mind control but beleave in your self.

Answer 8

i think you sound like a nice guy and I'm sure i would talk to you if i knew you but you also need to speak up !! i like a guy who steps up and you seem like a person who pines very romantic in the movies not in life , i did not so the 20/20 show but just because a guy gets a girl does not mean he keeps her! and any girl who liked you insulting them has low self esteem and was looking for some one to voice what they feel inside which is what they are comfortable with.i think it would be a good idea for you to join a book club or try to go to a book store if you see a nice woman linger near her for a moment and stare til she looks up and smile if she smiles back go and introduce yourself ask for her # then call and ask about her day tell her you liked meeting her and ask her out for coffee and remember to keep trying also note please don't change good guys are hard to find

Answer 9

you should keep being outgoing and confident but forget about being insulting. the truth is there are a lot of women who gravitate to men who put them down but thats not the kind of guy you are. don't change that. there are women who appreciate guys like you as well.

Answer 10

well i think that show is full of crap. i would rather have a guy that treated me right showed me good time. I don't fall for the jerks, but maybe that's just me. I think u should be yourself and not change for anyone. God made u the way u are for a reason. Go with and enjoy life.