Supose you are the father. Your birthday is tomorrow. Your son gives you today a touching bday gift and the weekly school report which is very bad ( 2 tests failed and behaivour complains) Normaly you would punish him severly for it. Will the touching gift make you not do that ?
He is retaking in summer school 3 subjects he failed . The bad report is due to not trying hard enough and just messing around.
2006-08-03 06:45:52 · 7 answers · asked by L R 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Acknowledge the gift...but definately punish the poor behavior...
They don't have anything to do with each other...so there is no need to ignore one over the other...
Thank him for the gift and beat his a$$ for the poor behavior...
2006-08-03 06:55:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends on you, i mean if you think it is bad enough that he needs to be punished then that is your call. I guess i would talk to him and try to find out why exactly he isn't trying in school, there could be something going on that you don't know about or that he doesn't want to tell you. Does his attitude change when he is at home, is it worse at school? you should answer those questions, watch him for a while and see, you might find that he wants to try there is just something bothering him. i am no psychiatrist, but that is the first thing i would look at. oh and yes i would think that the gift could make up for it! any time you get a gift from one of your kids it is special, you are a lucky dad!
i hope this helps a little! good luck
2006-08-03 14:00:18 · answer #2 · answered by puppy love 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit down and talk to him and thank him for his thoughtfulness and sincerity.
But later (a separate time) sit down with him also tell him that he needs to be punished for the subjects failed and not paying attention in class....and together you are going to work on anything in the classes or his social life at school that may be bothering him and get past it.
They are two separate occasions and should be dealt with that way.
2006-08-03 13:54:55 · answer #3 · answered by mistiaya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the two are seperate. treat them as such. he can't get out of being in trouble by kissing up to you!
my friend's son (2) tries to give her kisses whenever she is yelling at him for something. (he has a tendency to hit, etc). anyway, i told her that if he is misbehaving she should not give in just b/c he is now trying to be sweet!
have you thought about whether your son may have given you a really touching present b/c he knew he was giving you a bad report???
kids can be really manipulative!
i would punish him just as you would normally.
if he bring sup the gift, then tell him this, "i love my birthday present, however, i want you to know that getting a good report would have been the best present you could have gotten me."
he needs to learn that he can't "buy" his way out...
take care.
2006-08-03 13:54:06 · answer #4 · answered by joey322 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont let the card fool you....my kids to that all the time...sometimes i get cards for no reason at all...but right after i open that sweet card a report card or school letter comes right after....he knew what he was doing by giving you the card first....as much as it may make you feel bad you still have to punish him...its the only way he is going to learn...plus if you give in he is going to expect you to do it all the time....and that one time you dont thats when he will bring this one day up.....i mean you dont have to be hard on him give him a little slack but dont just let it go....it will only hurt him in the end...hope things work out....
2006-08-03 13:56:19 · answer #5 · answered by sgtrlopez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
heck no it wont, its obvious that the kid is giving you the touching gift so that you wont punish him. HE FAILED 3 SUBJECTS!! How does one do that? i would have to try to get a D in 1 class, nope, the kid deserves to be punished if he isnt trying
2006-08-03 13:52:42 · answer #6 · answered by Bryn H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to him dont punish him. tell him that if he wants to grow up to be like you and do the things you acomplished then he has to stop fooling around and buckle down.
2006-08-03 13:55:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋