My son is 15 and he says we are too strict on him with dating his girlfriend, what are reasonale rules?

Answer 1

You are the parents, and you do of course have control. But, to stay within reason... A curfew is not unreasonable; pick a time for him to come home that will allow him to get enough sleep to function well the next day. Prohibiting him from drinking or doing drugs is certainly not unreasonable. Meeting his date and asking where they will be going, perhaps providing a contact number, is not unreasonable (although perhaps outdated in the cell-phone age). If your son is keeping up his schoolwork and his dating is not causing other problems in his life, perhaps more leniency is warranted.

Answer 2

At 15? ..His mind is focused on two things: immediate pleasure, and becomming a respected individual.

Rules can be used, but not in any way that makes him feel oppressed or looked down upon. If you're the dad, talk to him less as a child and barter with him. "You can stay out till 12, but you have to work the garden tomorrow."

Also, keep him aware of STDs/pregnancy. "Always pull out." isn't the BEST advice, but it's better than telling him not to do it. Telling him not to do something that involves home-life in no way will just make him mad.

I have to say you need to meet his gf to know what's gonna happen. Good girls you don't need to worry about, because a few pictures can scare the hell out of them. But there are some REALLY easy (and manipulative) 15 year old girls these days. And i'm sure your son would wise-up after getting used for a year and get cheated on.

Keep him informed that when he messes up, it costs you money. He can understand money more than parenting.

Answer 3

I think at the age of 15 kids should be able to date with in reason, such as having the girlfriend over his house and for your son to be able to hang out at her parents house too. I think at the age of 15 you have to be somewhat strict......... No 15 year old needs to have a child and that is the main concern you need to have. Just try to be strict in a way where your child don't see that you are being strict. Let the 15 year old have some freedom but ALWAYS no where he is, and who he's doing it with. Have a curfew in reason too. Sincerely ...........Mom from Oklahoma

Answer 4

I do not think a fair answer can be made without knowing more. We don't, for example, know what country you live in or what culture (including religion, if that is relevant) you are affiliated with. Or the age of the girlfriend. Nor what you mean by "strict".

Often children are seeking limits even as they complain that their parents are too strict. Many children don't want to get ahead of themselves, but are under peer pressure. You can do your own research on that via Google, or in greater depth via OCLC and other scholarly bibliographic data bases at your library.

The most important rule concerns knowing where your son is (thanks to cell phones that isn't the problem it was years ago) and what time he should be home. And getting him to keep his commitments.

Unsurprisingly, most of the online resources concern parents worried about the dating habits of their [15-year-old] daughters.

Answer 5

I am a female but I was not allowed to date until I was 16. I would have his father or some other male in his life have the talk with him about making babies and diseases. I have answered many questions where the teenage father wanted the girl to have an abortion or he would leave her. It is not fair to the child. I would if he were my son, go on dates in public places were the chances of being alone with the girl were slim and set him a strict curfew until he is old enough to make his own decisions and support a child if something were to happen.

Answer 6

Like the old saying goes, "You give him your finger he's going to take your arm." Look at it like this your a mother in the 21st century and worring about your son i the number thing your going to do. So i say give him the bone but not all of it half now and half later....for example your son wants to go and be with his friends till 10 or 11 tell him him and his friends should go to the move or over the parents house you dont want him out on the streets....And if he wants to go you would drop him off and pick him up...if he has a cell phone call once or twice but not more than three...your giving him space and you lookin out for him and being a mother...

Answer 7

I let my 16 daughter have her boyfriend sleep over. They are allowed to stay up late and cuddle. When it comes time for bed he sleeps on the couch and she is up stairs. They have been dating for about 1 or more. We have known him for a very long time. I know that my daughter is sexually active so I have her on the pill. Some parents think that I'm too easy going.But, I know where my kids are at all times and know what they are really up to.No sneaky stuff,I say it's better to have an open honest relationship with your son, ask him what he thinks would be good limitations. Make sure you are very open to hearing what he has to say about drugs and sex. Don't lecture just listen, As a family you should be able to come up with some rules that you all agree on. I agree with Antonio.

Answer 8

First off, I would tell him that reasonable rules existed back when the chasity belts existed, rules today must be strict and enforced because of the 'in today' problems and peer preasures. Reasonable????? No dates without a shaperone until he is 16, and then no dates without it being a double date with a TRUSTED friend (that you trust him with) or a family member of his age. Dates end a half hour before he comes home........ at age 15... on weekends only (friday and saturday nights only) after homework is done and shown to you, and home by 10pm. At age 17, he can date single (just him and date) home by 11:30pm on weekends only......... during the week she can come by or he can go over there, after homework is finished and home by 8:00pm. Rules still apply at 18 if they are still home and living under your roof, only curfew lifted to 1am instead of 11:30pm. And they are to have there cell phone on at all times and you are to know where they are going and where there at all times in case of need to reach them for emergency cases. Is that harsh? Because that is how it is in my house hold.

Answer 9

TALK!!! Talk to him! I'm pretty sure that he knows how sex works at his age, but, just be sure he knows about STD's and some of the false statements about getting pregnant. If he is fully informed, then, the best thing to do is to trust him. I wouldn't leave them in a room all by themselves with the door shut, they are teenagers after all, but, I would let them go on dates. The worst feeling at that age is to think that your parent's don't trust that you know what you are doing (even though you don't) so, just talk to him and explain why the rules are the way they are--hope this helps.

Answer 10

my parents didn't let me date until I was sixteen.

here are some guidlines that I think should help
1. make sure if they are going somewhere together that it is a group date and not just the two of them
2. do not let him shut the door to his room if she is in it or better yet don't let the two of them in the room alone together
3.get to know her parents a little bit so you can see where they stand also. (it might also help if you knew their work scheds. so you have an idea of when it is not a good idea to let him go over there
4. make sure you lecture him on safe sex or better yet abstinence

You are his parents so you make the rules. He is only fifteen and his hormones are raging so he is not bound to make rational decisions. If you talk to him about your concerns and make sure he understand why you have the rules that you have, and maybe make a few compromises then that should help smooth things over