Question for you married folks.?

Question

Just wondering out it feels to know that you have a 60% chance of getting a divorce?

If it's your second marriage the chance is 71%

If it's your third marriage it is 83%

If its your fourth or beyond don't plan on your marriage lasting.

Good luck.

Answer 1

In this case no one wants to get married.

Answer 2

My husband and I don't want to be statistics in that sort of negative way. We want to beat the odds and be part of that 40% that does make it. We have been through ALOT of stuff...things that would make a marriage break...but we stick by one another and hold each other up and get through those tough times. We always come out stronger in the end. That is what I hold onto...not what the rest of society does. We WANT our marriage to work and we are going to fight for it to stay in tact when we need too. We have too much history and have had too many good times to let some difficult times be the end. Like you said the stats don't improve with anyone else so why go there. If more people had that kind of mind set and got help for their marriage when needed and really wanted to work on things and stopped being so selfish then maybe the divorce rate would not be so high.

Answer 3

Married with two kids for 9 years and I'm still in love with my husband and quite happy.

I never bother with those stats. We dated for 6 years before we got married and we were friends for a year before we dated.

I think folks who get married and then get divorced probably went into the marriage with the thought that if it doesn't work out there's an easy way out. To me it's that mindset that aids in the demise of the institution of marriage. Hey, I know this thought process doesn't apply to all divorce situations (there are always exceptions).

Our country makes it too easy to get married and too easy to get divorced. The sanctity of marriage has become a joke. Marriage is not "advanced dating".

When you take a vow: for better or worse, til death do us part, you should mean that! But you should know what you are getting into in the first place. Dating for a short period of time does not allow you to know enough about a person to make such a major decision. If you can't see yourself with this person for the rest of your life, then why marry them?

I have too many friends who get married because they think it's the next logical step and they are miserable. But they don't ask each other the major questions: "how do you handle money, how do you want to raise children, do you want children and how many, do you like to live in the country, suburbs, the boondocks..whatever. The point is talk about something meaniful and not just "where do you want to eat" and" what movie to do want to see".

Then those stats won't matter!

Answer 4

Well clearly you have some need to justify your own disdain for marriage, and equally clearly this was not a question at all, but an editorial.

Still, following your line of reasoning, should we not attempt to do anything at which there is a risk of failure? Should we never strive for happiness? Should Lindberg have not attempted to fly the Atlantic non-stop? Should the Boston Redsox have just surrendered to fate and not even tried to beat the Yankees after so many losses in the World Series? Mr. Everest I suppose could remain unclimbed as well.

Accomplishments are what they are because they involve some risk of failure--sometimes even a significant risk of failure. I've been married for 31 years now, and not every moment of it was necessarily a walk in the rose garden, but my wife and I have worked hard to build a relationship that can endure challenges. As you have asked, it feels very good indeed to know that whatever comes my way, I have a loyal ally to help me deal with it. So while I thank you for your wishes of good fortune, I also return the same to you. Being alone as you are, you may find luck to be the only thing you can cling to next time you are in a tight spot. But something I find even sadder I think, with whom will you share your accomplishments, your sunsets, the ever renewing cycle of life that is your children? Yes, good luck my friend, I think you will need it.

Answer 5

although the numbers and statistics are there, it is all what you make of it and how hard both individuals work to keep and maintain a working and compatible relationship.

Many divorces occur early in the marriage - within the first five years. It takes much effort in those first years to balance life, a marriage, career, children, etc. It can be a difficult period of adjustment as well. Best to keep communication open and honest.

Answer 6

I don't believe in divorce, I know I love my husband very much and I will love him for the rest of my life, we believe a marriage should last for a life time and only marry once in this life time so it'd be stupid to get a divorce. There are no perfect marriages, there are arguements problems, but when you're in a marriage when problems occur you need to solve it immediately, divorce isn't the answer for everything. Plus the day you got married is the day you vowed to god that you'd be together for an eternity, so therefore people who got divorced are the ones who lied to god for those of you who believes in god.

Answer 7

I've been divorced twice......I'm on my third marriage and I think statistics are what you make them. We have had our ups and downs but I want to be with this one forever and he feels the same. Also it's all part of life and it really doesn't bother me, it's all in God's hands anyway and if I let him lead the way why would I be disappointed.

Answer 8

Our chance is better than that. We come from same backrounds, religions, beliefs. Both our parents have been married for almost 30 years and nobody in our families have been divorced. We also did premarital counseling which ups your chances of staying together. The odds of staying married are in our favor now.

Answer 9

The problem with marraige is people dont understand what marraige is. You make a promise to stay with someone through rich and poor the good and bad. THen when the bad happens your run. Thats the problem people lie on there wedding day. Not me im staying married

Answer 10

The percentages don't scare me. We were also told that since we married while I was still in college it wouldn't last. well, that was 10 years ago and we are still growing strong. We rarely argue, never raise our voice to each other and spend every free moment together. We made a lifelong commitment and would rather lose our lives than lose each other.

Answer 11

Feels great being married for over 22 years! Nothing like beating the odds!