Ladies so you had this huge argument with your husband and....?

Question

we are not on talking terms and its his fault and i have proved it but he does not want to apologise, too proud, so i'm giving him the cold shoulder for the last couple of days until he does, but he is just ignoring me. What do u think carry on and he will give in. And any tips on how to get his attention at home, he is playing ignorant and turns his back to me when we get in bed. I dont want to give in and apologise cos its not my fault and he always expects me to take the first step when i am not wrong, how do i teach him a lesson.

Answer 1

I used a lot of this info before, but I think it will help you as well:

Don’t teach him a lesson, teach him and yourself how to argue productively.
Resolve the issue that is causing your fight when things are normal. Be logical and open minded. Don’t expect the fight to resolve anything, they rarely do. After the fight, don’t make a production of ‘making up,’ simply return to life as normal.
Too many people bottle things up and then let loose when it’s time for a fight. This is insane. How is your partner to change offending behaviors if you hold your feelings about it in? Is your partner really going to be listening to your feelings in the middle of an argument? Down time is the best time to express yourself, you both should be in a more receptive frame of mind. If this causes a fight then there is some other issue that needs to be addressed, look for this.
Communicate with your partner constantly and consistently. Make your views known in the moment. The best way to make up is to use strong communication skills and mutual respect to avoid the fight.
Most importantly, realize that fights are not about right and wrong. It is totally possible, and even common, for two people who are completely correct under their own paradigm to end up in an argument with one another. if you are arguing to prove the other wrong, you are simply beaten before you begin. By the other person’s POV you are wrong, thus, any point you try to make is perceived as you trying to justify your wrong opinion. Instead argue to share ideas and feelings. The other person can easily concede that you feel a given way because you know yourself better than they do. This creates common ground and that is what successfully ends an argument.
Don’t apologize or expect an apology. Live in love. Don’t hold a grudge. Start over with my advice in mind and see if things get better.

Answer 2

You don't always teach him a lesson. You didn't say what its about so its hard to say but sometimes you have to decide whether your prefer being right or being happy. Sometimes the graciousness to forgive (or at least drop) something that you don't technically think you are wrong about does your relationship much more good than winning an argument does. It can make you feel like a much better person to. My guess is that once you cut him a break you will get the apology you are looking for. As long as you are both having this silly stand off nobody is winning anything are they, it is just being dragged out and wasting days that someday you will wish you had back. Think about it, what do you REALLY get if he relents and admits you win? Is there a million dollar jackpot? An extra 5 years of good health added to your life? Surely there must at least be a brand new car involved to go through all this misery? No there are none of those things so what really is the point? Weigh the benefit of winning the fight against losing your marriage because too much of this behavior (from either of you) will cause just that.

Think of it this way, letting go of this doesn't make you less whereas being a better person about it certainly makes your more!

Answer 3

They way I see it. You married each other for better or worse. I am sure whatever you two went through, does not mean you two should be mean and rude to each other.

That won't fix the problem.

If he or you died tomorrow or injured, how would you feel about this issue? Would you feel bad and regret? if so, that is proof this isn't worth the whole "I am not apologizing cuz I am right and you are wrong".

How do you teach him a lesson?

Set the example and apologize for the way you are acting. You are not saying sorry for what he did. But saying what you are doing now and you want this to be fixed.

I don't know the terms of the situation but I think you two need to seek a third person: marriage counselor for some guidance on how to properly and healthy install ways of solving issues.

Answer 4

You are not his parent and your relationship with him is not about teaching him any lessons whether he is right or wrong. Bring the matter to his attention and forget about your resentment. If he is a good man to begin with, he will acknowledge anything he did wrong. If he doesn't, then it's your fault for marrying a man that does not do what is right. Own up to your choices. you chose to marry him so that's your fault

Answer 5

I think you need to continue the cold shoulder. He needs to realize that you did nothing wrong and have no reason to apologize. Strut around in stuff that you know he likes to see you in whether it is sexy clothing or something. You need to get his attention and when he tries to start talking to you or something brush him off. He will get the point...it might take him a while but he will catch on.

Good luck!

Answer 6

two wrongs don't make it right!!! We as women sometimes have to step out of our comfort zone and be the first to apologize Even if we didn't do anything wrong!!!! My grandma use to say don't let the sun go down without apologizing and telling a person how important they are to you and how much you love them !!! Because as sure as the sun sets it will rise again and that other person may not awake to the rising of the son!!!! Its not worth holding grudges just love him and let it go!!!!

Answer 7

Carry on the cold shoulder until something big comes up to break the ice.

Answer 8

Dont treat him like he is a child or a dog

Even though he is wrong, you be the bigger one and intiate the conversation. Dont let time go by when you are mad. Time is too precious. It is not healthy and it affects all other areas in your life.

Be patient. Be kind and move on. (even if he doesnt apologize)

Answer 9

Good Morning, Me and my husband what I like about our marriage is we have been together for 8 years and it keeps on getting stronger.I am not saying we dont get upset with other we do we just dont argue if we feel that way we go out for a walk or for a drive and we come back with a positive attitude like nothing was wrong my best friend said I have never seen you and your husband argue and I respect that. I said it doesnt matter who is wrong me or him We go vent on the outside and we dont want negative in the Home. And never never as a married couple should you go to bed angry because if he is turning his back on you in bed he may turn his back on your relationship.. Look honey if you love your husband unconditionally you have proved you were right now move on. And you know how you beat his behavior and still be on top... Treat him with kindness.. You know you are right just leave it at that.It is not, oh I am going to teach him a lesson.But we as woman always have to be a step header than our men.. So apologize, Say something like Honey I love you too much to let this go on so I am going to be the bigger person and apologize. It doesnt matter wether who is wrong or right I want us to last forever. And my love is forever with you.. Trust me he is going to hug you and kiss you But the big kicker is while you are not around it is going to eat him up that you were the bigger person and came to him as a woman and apologized. Knowing that he was wrong. So dont put any strain on your marriage if you want it to last. My grandmother stayed with my grandfather for over 50 years and it was plenty of times my grandpa was wrong but I seen how strong she was and learned from her example.. So Be strong honey and move on life is too short. And beleive me you both dont want to be upset with each other and something wrong happens that will hurt either one of you knowing you were upset and didnt have the chance to say Goodbye alot of that happens to. So be the bigger one and move on because it is not worth it. And before I married my husband I have dated him for 2 years and we been married for 6 And things couldnt get any better not saying my hubby doesnt get me upset but I take a walk or a drive and when I return truly forgot what I was upset about.. I dont eat breakfast lunch or dinner without my hubby dont go to bed without my hubby and if we go on seperate trips we are constantly on the phone with each other like we are teenagers. I wouldnt change it for the world. We even have different religions but we both respect each other religions because I do say he beleives and I beleive. And we take it one day at a time.. GOOd LUCK and GOD BLess And let me know how it turned out

Answer 10

stand your ground!!!!!!!!!!! if you have proof than you are at no fault. just make sure that before you go to sleep that you tell him that you love him always, that way if something happens to him HOPE NOT you know in your heart that you told him how you feel .....