this is a question which was in my mind for a loong time..
it's like this. i have a nice, charming and quite goodlooking boyfriend. there are women, who just try to win him over, EVEN IF they saw me and realized i'm his girl.
just to show you what i mean: once there was a girl, staring at my boyfriend for the whole night out. a distant friend of a friend. when we said goodbye, she clung to my boyfriend, got real close to his face and whispered something in his ear. it turned out to be (he told me) "i would do many wild things with you, if we were alone..." such a thing. i was so angry but couldn't act, since we had already left the place.
another time, i remarked a girl who obviously looked at him with lust and great interest - she gave me a jealous and disrespectful look too...
another time, there is this friend of his sister oviously flirting with him, trying to catch his attention, even though i'm sitting next to my boyfriend! i was boiling. but showing my anger seemed
2006-08-02 22:27:54 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
like showing weakness. so i didn't but had a word with my boyfriend and said she makes me angry and that it is obvious.
IT'S SITUATIONS LIKE THIS that leave me clueless. i do not know what to do. showing the slighest reaction to such girls seems like losing control & letting them disturb the peace of our relationship. no reaction & staying calm always seemed the best. but i'm boiling inside. fee-ling helpless. seems like i have no experience (i'm 29) of how to win competition ;)
it makes me feel disrespected. hate it. i don't know how to deal with it!!!!! HOW can i fight back and show my teeths? i am nice and respectuful. i'm always the nice girl with other girls. i'm friendly but NEVER KNOW how to fend myself. please give he good advice ;-) i hate feeling so helpless...
2006-08-02 22:28:21 · update #1
You are always gonna have that type of problem, Increase the trust you have with him, to help curve your jealousy.
Me and my girl made a pack.
Never let someone walk between us when in public, if i step to the right , you step to the right. If a "guy" ask her for a match, hand it to me and I will give it to him and vise-verse with women. We had several, including when someone makes a pass at you "stop them in their tracks and introduce "us" to them. These little tactics say more (without saying a word) than you can ever say to another women.
Start by talking with your guy, if he blows it off like you are over reacting, then your problem is with him.
It's your boyfriends job to keep you feeling secure, and your job to keep him feeling secure.
2006-08-02 22:48:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The two lady avatars summed up pretty much my story line here.
Truth: any man, married, engaged, or whatever, would be somewhat flattered if a girl whispered that in his ear. I'm married, and I know I would get a rise out of it.
Truth: any man, married, engaged, or whatever, will respect his s/o and say no to temptation. If your bf is a decent chap, he won't even be tempted, so what is the worry?
Fact: men don't like jealous girlfriends. You come across as insecure, and we love our women to be totally secure in themselves.
Fact: men like to feel like they are in control. If your bf detects that you are trying to steer him around these other women, he will become less attached to you emotionally, because of the reason given above.
Of course, these are generalizations, but in my experience (I'm 34 and married), they are more truth than fiction.
Get over it. Take a pill or something. If your boyfriend does leave you over some floozy whispering garbage in his ear, then that is best anyways...you want a man who loves YOU!!
2006-08-03 05:44:14 · answer #2 · answered by powhound 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you should learn to trust your boyfriend. You'll have the chance to see whether his eyes are only focused on you. It's hard to find men who aren't easily affected by seduction of other prettier women. And if it goes a little too far, you have the right to butt in or take action.
I advice you shouldn't over react in public places when those kind of things happen since you might embarass your boyfriend or yourself in that matter. And don't try to act b*tchy to scare them away, other people might secretly hate you and you might accidentally hurt someone who didn't really have any intentions for your bf. Anyways just don't assume too much that every girl that comes in contact with your bf is trying to steal him away from you unless your definitely sure, like those you mentioned above.
I think you should try talking it out with your bf, tell him your concerened about the other girls trying to snatch him away from you. Oh and I suggest you keep him busy, like having a fun conversation with him so he won't even notice those "bf stealers"
Remember your HIS gf, he enjoys your companionship more than any other girl around.
2006-08-03 05:49:17 · answer #3 · answered by Snowflake 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hm well i am ususally not a jealous person so i cannot really understand the problem there.. why are you so angry? are you afraid to lose him? but if you are sure of his love then all is fine, i mean if he does not flirt back there is no need to worry.. just be proud of having such a goodlooking boyfriend, you're the one who has him, the others just want him.. so you already did win the competition, if that is what it's all about...
2006-08-03 05:34:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you did shows a different kind of class. I really admire it. showing them your claws will only show them how insecure you are. JUst dont do anything. Your guy seems to be into you and not them So i dont think theres a problem at all. When an incident such as that occurs just smile and give your guy a kiss. That will show them:)
2006-08-03 05:35:35 · answer #5 · answered by wittlewabbit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There wil always be wolves out there trying to win your man over, except that first. You have him all to yourself and you should laugh at them when they try something, say something like " Don't you just love the fact that I'm on his arm and not you". Always be polite but cruel in the same way. Just let them see that you're no walk-over. Smile when you're out with him and show the bitches what a gr8 catch you have on your arm.
2006-08-03 05:36:49 · answer #6 · answered by yarisgp 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it souds like you have a problem but i need to ask you are you mad at them or him.if the answers them then have guys extras for when that happens you can call them over to pick up the bar flys.not doing it ask him in front of them next time do you want me or do you want left overs? so if you answers him just get 3 guy to come over and make out with you when your out next time
2006-08-03 05:39:17 · answer #7 · answered by game boy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have faith in your bf if he really loves you then no one can take him away from you.
2006-08-03 05:34:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋