I've always enjoyed helping people with their problems... And for the most part, I have been quite successful (at least I like to think so), but recently it seems that people use me for this help say they want to be friends (which is fine by me), then suddenly they treat me like a leper, and disappear...
And I am starting to feel more and more empty, like they are taking a piece of me with them when they go...
Do you ever get like that???
2006-08-02 21:24:52 · 35 answers · asked by Forlorn Hope 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Helping is about giving without expecting anything in return!
The moment you don't have any expectations from the ones you help, you will start feeling better!!
2006-08-02 21:34:02 · answer #1 · answered by Cool Guy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I help my friends and family, and sometimes feel the same way. But then your true friends are the ones you maybe don't see all the time, but they'd be there in a second for you should you ever need them. Family too; and mine usually are.
I think its life though that you don't have to live in each other's pockets all the time.
Just make sure they're not taking advantage of your good nature, cause it does hurt if you look at the situation and realise that.
Don't feel too empty though. At least you're a good person with your heart in the right place. You sound decent and kind.
Find friends who will recognise that, rather than as you say, treat you like a leper when they don't need you.
You seem alright to me. Don't be so hard on yourself.
2006-08-02 21:37:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's worthwile to help someone when you know they appreciate it, nobody likes ingratitude. The hard truth is, though, the world is full of users and takers. If you open yourself to being hurt or used by people, many will do just that. I'm not trying to sound all negative or like a people hater but I do think you should maybe reconsider who you are hanging around and who you choose to help. I would never hesitate to help a close friend or family member. I would be suspicious of any new acquaintances immediately asking for help.
2006-08-02 21:39:01 · answer #3 · answered by going_batty 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Helping others is good in a way that you'll feel good about yourself, for helping someone in need. I think that you should continue helping others as long as you help the right people for the right reasons. Sometimes, people tend to be abusive, so it's best if you choose your friends well. If you think that you cant say no to a friend (even if he/she is already abusing your kindness), then just think of it as a good deed. Anyway, there is what we call " Good Karma " wherein, what you do to others will be like a mirror effect, and good things will also reflect back to you!
2006-08-02 23:03:52 · answer #4 · answered by shelly_cute 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you go out your way for someone and then you get shat on from a great height. You can count your true friends on one hand. The rest are just an acquaintance maybe just someone to have a laugh with. If you get a buzz from helping people then carryon but theres only so much trampoling on you should take.
2006-08-02 21:44:43 · answer #5 · answered by pinktart2003 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. I find it quite often happens. Some people infect you with their negativity. I used to have a friend who'd come round and unburden themselves about their non-existant relationship with a married person and by the time they had gone, I'd have to go to bed - completely exhausted!
You need to start being with positive people who can make you feel good about yourself. Stop being everyone's repository for problems - I know saying 'no' is the hardest thing to do, but for the sake of your mental health, you must do it!
2006-08-02 21:30:43 · answer #6 · answered by Roxy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Helping others is always worthwhile but never at the expense of yourself. Because when you're drained like that how can you still help others? Take some time off, recharge and then head on.
2006-08-02 21:33:01 · answer #7 · answered by groovusy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I know what you mean. I'm a college student and had "friends" in previous classes, but it seems that they just wanted my help in homework, tests, study guides, etc.
I don't know... right now I'm helping you by answering this question. I could have simply chosen not to answer it. So, why did I answer it? There's not really a reward except for 2 small points. I guess we just help others just to be nice because we feel it's the right thing to do.
2006-08-02 21:28:50 · answer #8 · answered by Sleepless Bookworm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's always worthwhile to help others. Some like to take advantage of this, but there are always people out there that won't . I say keep helping others. That's my opinion.
2006-08-02 23:06:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES, but alas that's the society that we live in today... good people get hurt and the bad ones thrive and revel in their hatred ridden success....
Hey at least on our judgement day we will go to a happier peace full place...
2006-08-02 22:28:22 · answer #10 · answered by Cat ( " , ) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes
2006-08-02 21:28:24 · answer #11 · answered by basscatcher 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋