Why do Indian men seem to have such a fascination with women that come off as strong or assertive?

Question

I have noticed that in my experience with first generation Indian men, the one common denominator I have found is a fascination with women, especially American women, who come off as particularly strong, especially those that have taken on stereotypically masculine roles. From my community college economics professor that had a noticable crush on a female soldier in our class to the Indian men I've dated who have told me that they were turned on by the portrayals in American films of "strong women types" (such as Ashley Judd in Double Jeopordy) this is something I have observed time and again and have never heard anyone else speak of. Nor have I read anyone ever remark on it. This is not something I was necessarily expecting and would like to know if anyone has a take on this or has observed ithis phenomenon as well. Please refrain from answering if you don't possess some legitimate insight into or experience with Indian culture. Thank you.

Answer 1

It's quite simple. In India, strong women are a rarity. They must walk 10 feet behind their husbands, cook the meals, etc. A strong woman, to them, is something exotic and new. Also, I would imagine that more than a few people would like to spend time with someone they consider to be an equal, and who considers herself an equal. There is also the possibility that taming the wild one holds some appeal, as well. My friends' sister is 2nd generation indian, who married a 1st gen indian.

There were all kinds of issues as he expected her (fiercely independent american woman) to suddenly adopt a traditional indian female role upon marriage. They are getting along better now, but it was quite a mess for a while.

Answer 2

My current boyfriend (Indian) who I have just moved in with has only been in this country for about six years. I am the type that is more domineering, just as described in the question. I wondered the same thing myself. Just last week though, we went to his cousins and I got a sobering grip of their reality. I know that cultures are different, but I guess I couldn't handle it as well as I thought. The women served the men, and in fact, were in a different rooms for the majority of the evening. Everyone was so kind to me, but I know that I just could not ever be like them. It isn't in my personality. Then I asked him why he was with me. I am too demanding (and know it) and definitely to "forward" shall we say. He said "oh, come one" and made light of it. But now, I don't know what to do....
So, as to my point, yes, I too have made the same observations, but I am sorry I have little to answer to the question, why.
I do have something to add though, was there any common denominator of the way these same women looked? Similarities like size, height, shape, etc.? I have a few theories pertaining to that as well. Good Luck! :)

Answer 3

Agree with you. My younger brother(Indian) lived in US for 3 decades and quite well-placed. He however had great regard for his wife, treated her with kid gloves and pandered to every one of her desires.He was otherwise quite domineering as I had observed him earlier. Does this happen only in US. Here in India it is entirely the other way round. More than 70% couples I observe the husband is calling the shots. I am personally one such specimen. Can not explain this in any rational way!