i'm still really hurt over my divorce what can I do?

Question

I was married 11 yrs divorced for 4 I've known him 17 yrs all together. But still every day I feel sad

Answer 1

You may need therapy. I’m not bashing you, it’s just somewhat unusual to carry this so long. I know that it is different for everyone, but my gut instinct is that you have some unresolved issues that may have little obvious pertinence to the divorce. Only a few good therapy sessions can bring this to light and help you get back to your normal life.
Not to get metaphysical, but I would also pay attention to your dreams. A lot of times, dreams circumvent morality as well as reality and they can clue you into things that you want and/or fear but are unwilling to confront consciously.
No feeling is absolutely Wright or wrong, but this seems to be unhealthy. Find the courage to confront things that are difficult and the wisdom to see them for what they truly are. The strength is inside you. you just have to find it.

Answer 2

You feel sad everyday because you choose to be sad. Each day is a new day and is full of new opportunities. Tomorrow, the first thing you need to do is wake up and say "I'm going to have a great day". Then get up, get out and do something. Your marriage ended honey, not your life. Do this everyday for about two weeks. Eventually it'll become a habit and you'll start enjoying life again. It's hard to move forward when you keep looking back. I know it's easier said than done, but when you consider the fact that four years of sadness has only brought your more sadness, why not try something else?

Answer 3

It takes time, I realize it has been 4 yrs, but after being married for 11yrs it's going to take time. Avoid situations where you and he were together as a couple, make new friends that have nothing to do with you two as a couple. Get out, and get away. Look up friends you haven't seen in awhile. Most of all talk to someone, your minister, someone who isn't directly involved. Most of all forgive yourself and him for the marriage not working. Take care and Good luck

Answer 4

i have been married for 42 yrs. and now my husband wants a divorce. its never easy and you will never forget. you will always love them but you might resent and dislike them for the decisions they have made. i am on lexapro which i could not do it without it. try that as it really helps you get thru the hurt. i still hurt daily and i am not even divorced yet. i look at what he has done to me and is still doing to me with other women. that helps me dislike him all the more. go to church, get involved and meet someone nice like i did. that will really help you. you need a special friend to help you thru this. i met mine on the internet and he is a joy to know. give that a try and see if it helps. good luck!!

Answer 5

I highly suggest finding a good therapist. It is natural to grieve a loss, but there has to come a time when you move forward. Feeling sad for four years is a long time and it really would be beneficial to you to talk to someone. It will be worth it. There are still good things ahead for you.

Answer 6

Yes , it is very painful experience , but life has to go on , better start taking some sort of job to get occupy your self , and same time try to get to know another soul mate , do some meditation regularly , you will get peace of mind .

Answer 7

you cant live in the past no matter how bad you feel i would tell you to go out and make new friends.4. years is a long time. my opion?

Answer 8

You feel sad because you want to. Your punishment and your excuse not to be happy.
Eat some ice cream and get over it.

Answer 9

The best way to get over someone is to get under someone.

Answer 10

4 years?? oh my. move on. find someone new. 4 years, too long.