I find that my husband and I have our best important conversations on the phone. Like bills, our son, his family problems. It is not that we do not see each other but when I get home from work or vise vera we do nt talk about the thing we were talking about on the phone. Then the next say we pick up where we left off. We are home the majority of the night together but they topic never get brought up or if they do the conversations are not a free flowing as they were on the phone. Does anyone else find there relationship is like this. Also, why do you think this might be?
2006-08-02 15:45:07 · 30 answers · asked by Mrs. Mac 4 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I hate talking on the phone so it doesn't happen for us.
Maybe you are just so busy when you are together you can't focus on the conversation. On the phone you can pay attention better.
Either that or your breath just stinks all the time.
2006-08-02 15:49:02 · answer #1 · answered by Andrew 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'll try this 1, you have heard of having your days & nights mixed up, right? well it's almost the same. Try 2 save some of the topics that u always discuss on the phone 4 your time alone at home. I'm sure u dont want 2 spend all your time alone talking about these topics but try 2 split it up a little bit. Try 2 find a excuse 2 hang up a little sooner, then u will have 2 talk about them at home. Face 2 face is always the best form of conversation. Wish u lots of luck
2006-08-02 22:54:47 · answer #2 · answered by juslookin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know the feeling
If I call home from work I get the same thing from my husband. Discussing anything of importance the to do list for the next day bills all that stuff. When I am home we do talk but its joking around or discussing something we saw on TV or the gardens stuff like that.
To us we have realized that its a strength thing. We know that when we hang up the phone and say our I love yous that even though we aren't next to each other right then that we aren't losing touch. Its kind of hard to explain.
Just think about the feeling you have inside once you have one of those calls and hang up the phone. You know your man is still there with you and he loves you.
2006-08-02 22:51:21 · answer #3 · answered by jennbabe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to find the same thing too. Funny isn't it? It's also funny when you say, 'we have to talk'. That's another cue for a man to not say a word. You can practise by starting out casual conversation. I have tried this and my husband will respond as if I was asking something out of the ordinary and I will say, I'm just making conversation. I like to hear what you think. Then later on, or the next day, he has thought about how I felt and he will try in his manly way to communicate...soon he goes back to his self centered little stock market world and life goes on as usual.
2006-08-02 22:52:45 · answer #4 · answered by peppermint_paddy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This might be an issue with confrontation... either you or your husband has a hard time confronting the issue head on while together so the phone plays as sort of a third party... first i think its important that you bring up THIS issue with your husband.... it could be something that needs to be taken to counseling...start out and just ask him casually "why cant we talk about the important things face to face?" or something like that... good luck!
2006-08-02 22:49:37 · answer #5 · answered by tustudent 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The phone may provide you with some objective distance you need to discuss a situation without getting all emotional and into a fight.
If this works for you, great! Don't worry about it. Just keep calling each other with the lines of communication open.
2006-08-02 22:48:34 · answer #6 · answered by DD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I chat online with my hubby when he is at the office and I think that we have most of our important talks this way too. I don't think it's unusual... I just think it takes the pressure off all the "talks". When he gets home, he gets to play with our 2 yr old and I don't have to hang around waiting for her to go to sleep in order to talk to him... I think it works great for us, so if it works great for you.. don't change it, plus I'm sure, when you take trips or long drives or whatever you can talk just fine... sometimes daily routines mess up a couples communication, know what I mean? Thank God you at least have conversations, there are couples who simply don't talk at all, those, I believe need serious counseling.
2006-08-02 23:09:28 · answer #7 · answered by C a R L i T a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm.....maybe he feels like he has more privacy this way. Maybe it is his way bonding with you by using the phone to talk about more intimite issues rather than bringing them home and discussing them in front of the family. What ever the issue, I wouldn't worry too much about it. As long as you two are still communicating then this is a good thing. It is your way of bonding and making things stick together.
2006-08-02 22:50:01 · answer #8 · answered by Melissa M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you busy at home?, Maybe you're both used to dealing with customers/clients via phone for work reasons?
Could it be that one or both of you are distratced at home, And on the phone you have no other option but to listen/talk?
either way i'd get it settled ASAP communication is everything, Maybe bring this up with your husband and see if he notices too.
2006-08-02 22:51:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Strange that you should ask this question. I have been married for 36 years and find that I can talk more openly with my wife on the phone than in person. Can't explain why but rest assured that you are not alone in doing this.
2006-08-02 23:07:36 · answer #10 · answered by acmeraven 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you both can deal with the actual issue better when you are concentrating on the issue and have no distractions in the home.... dinner, perhaps kids, TV, sports, etc. I think to change this set up a time after 10pm for "together time"..... maybe quiet, a bottle of wine.....
2006-08-02 22:50:41 · answer #11 · answered by Kerry Z 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋