my sex life is boring w/ my husband, what can we do to jazz it up?

Question

I am 27,(F) I have been with him since I was 16, he has been my only sexual partner, now we hardly ever have sex any more. PLEASE HELP!!!

Answer 1

Well this is a complex question. Since you've been together for so long, it may be a factor of boredom in the bedroom. If your sex so far has been pretty routine, it could be that. Is he your age? Even if he is, he could be suffering from a libido problem which can be embarrassing. Also a shift in attention to other sexual media, like porn, can cause a change.

As for ideas for jazzing it up, see a few of my earlier posts:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Al1TlSMkUbXSwezZ.w8.4rbsy6IX?qid=20060729175957AAwHZMV

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Al1TlSMkUbXSwezZ.w8.4rbsy6IX?qid=20060725195245AAy2Wvh

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=ApzJcCiPwb_n3ZkkWgIvIrbsy6IX?qid=20060725195605AA9hpA9

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=ArJh_I8cvn7fHp6Fx93SPdfsy6IX?qid=20060724185715AAXSYzW

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AiUoyeV6gJ96g7GIAEYIlMjsy6IX?qid=20060712192550AAiAatQ


Not all of them are directly similar to your question, but I post some ideas for spicing things up a bit.

Feedback is welcome. Give me a shout on Yahoo if you have any questions. Good Luck!!

Answer 2

Everyday stress of life can get in the way of long relationships. Sometimes a change of scenery, or doing "it" somewhere in your house other than the bedroom can make a temporary difference. When was the last time you met him naked at the door? OK, in a loosely tied satin bathrobe! Has he ever asked about kinky sex? What did you say? Have you asked about kinky sex? What did he say? (Between husband and wife, nothing is "too kinky.") When you are married or in a long-term relationship, you can fall into a rut without noticing.

But I'll tell you that sex is often a symptom, not the cause, of a problem. How do you REALLY feel about each other? Any unresolved issues (read as anger) on either side? Guys are not so good at "feelings," so you two might need counseling to draw this out in a non-threatening way.

Answer 3

I am in the same situation and I know how you feel. I have been married for nine years now and I am bored....*yawn* I recently have decided to employ the use of a sex toy to see if that helps spice things up a bit. I have heard that role playing is also fun but I am not really the kind of person to do that. My husband is not very imaginative so that doesn't help. I think sexy lingerie and kinky little things like body butters and handcuffs could also make things fun. Maybe even watching an erotic movie together could get you both aroused?? Just a thought...there are some good online stores out there with some very cool things for just our kind of problem and I have only recently started looking into it myself because I am sick of sex being quicker than a commercial break on tv on those rare occasions I am blessed to get it at all.

Answer 4

Oh...well that's rather awkward. Branch out. Try a little s/m. You could also explore fetishes. I find foot worship repugnant, but some people enjoy it. You could dress him up and order him around. Or if you're the more submissive type, dress yourself as a schoolgirl and have him in a suit and tie, and have him "discipline" you. Introduce a few toys into the act. Get kinky, film yourselves. Go for a little voyeurism. Just use your imagination! See what he goes for. I would not recommend a 3way. That can make things really awkward, but I suppose if you're both open to the idea, make sure you pick someone you can trust and use protection (condoms and dental damns). If you like that, look for swingers clubs too (again, something I'd rather not do, but this is about you not me). There's lots to do, you're only limited by your imagination and openness.

Answer 5

Spice it up by doing different things, show up at the door wearing nothing, get some toys, get some tapes, talk to him like you never would have normally, tell him how you feel calmly, be willing to do wild and crazy things, and tell him so. Add some ice, add some heat, eat some food stuffs, get some feathers, massaging oils, oysters. Feels good about yourself, and make sure he feels comfortable with himself. Swap positions, play some adult games. There are several things you can do to spice it up, but I mainly think you should tell him, talk to him about how you feel, and do not be scared to disclose any information to him, he is your husband, talk, tell, and have some fun.

Answer 6

Be spontaneous....do something different. Bring it back out of the bedroom. I got tired of making the passed at her, so I suggested she do what I'm suggesting to you. We used to do it everywhere, then it turned into a bedroom thing and I got tired of that. Just do things out of the blue like the early days and if he's still interested, he'll respond. If he doesn't respond, you probably need to talk, and that may not be bad....there may be stress at work or something.....just talk it out.
Good luck....

Answer 7

go to the adult store and find a few toys and games to spruce up your bedroom life.

Answer 8

i don't want to offend u, but u should try getting another partner. just to get thru this dry patch.

Answer 9

Role playing, sexy lingerie, or drive to a secluded place and come on to him.

Answer 10

Role play...use some toys...... play with yourself in front of him....make it kinky .... open the door for him stark naked !!