i have been flirting with my boss for a few weeks now off and on. we are both married. what next?

Question

flirting
co-workers
married
unhappy

Answer 1

You cannot fix your marriage by turning away from it, e.g. by turning to someone else. Try to be a loving and caring adult about this. Talk to your wife. Tell her you want to fix your marriage. See a counselor or do whatever else it takes to see if can be fixed. If it can be fixed, you'll have something precious. If it can't, you can move on.

If you have an affair with your boss, you will make it all but impossible to fix your marriage and you will risk your job and hurt other people in the process.

If you don't want to fix your marriage, at least have the decency to tell her that you want to move on. Don't let her figure it out by having you cheat on her; it shows disrepect and disdain.

Answer 2

think carefully about the consequences.
flirting between two married people is exciting for many because of the taboo nature of the relationship (The "Married" part and the "Boss" part) , but taking it further can be disastrous, because it WILL ruin a lot of things in your life.

Especially when she is your boss. That is simply not a good idea. here are a couple of things:

1) If your marriage is unhappy, try to resolve the issues or get a divorce (not easy, but if there is no other way....)
2) Quit your job and find a new one, and then see if the feelings do exist.

Don;t let this flirtation lead to other things. It simply will not work in your current situation.

Answer 3

You have to think about what you are doing. You are being unfaithful towards your wife/husband which is wrong. How long have you been married for? It's common that after a couple has been married for a while (such as 15-20 years) they begin to get bored of eachother and they start to look at others. If you have a family with children you really need to think about it like this "How would I feel if (spouse's name) was flirting with someone?" and "How will my kids feel?" I think the best thing is to try to keep as much distance from you and your boss as possible and since she/he is your boss just stay strictly to business no fooling around.

Answer 4

Dump some ice down your pants and move on with your life. Haven't you paid ANY attention to what goes on around you??

People who screw their coworkers (and ESPECIALLY their bosses) end up getting screwed in the end - sometimes literally.

Do you really want to lose your job over an affair? How about 1/2 your marital assets? Do you honestly think that your wife - happily married or not - would be pleased with you for f*cking someone else? Give me a break.

If you can't keep it in your pants, get your butt to an attorney's office and file for a divorce.

Answer 5

You really need to control yourself despite being unhappy in your marriage. If you do something about the flirtation it's as though you've already quit your marriage. How can you and your wife fix something when you haven't made your unhappiness known.

I think you need to be honest with you wife and say, "I'm not so happy in my marriage lately, to the point where I'm tempted to look outside of the marriage, but I want to make this work and so I'd really like to turn inwards to you, and fix this from the inside out instead of destroying it from the outside in. I seriously value our union and want to honor and cherish it like we said in our vows. Let's get counseling, or talk about some of the problems".

That would be the responsible thing to do. Especially if you have children, a divorce or an affair will just devastate them. You wouldn't just be cheating on your wife, you'd be cheating on your kids, and they'd never see it ANY differently, not matter how old they got. You'd also just cause your wife so much undue psychological harm. It has DIRE consequences, and you need to know that and seriously make the right decision here. Be a man.

Answer 6

you on all fours in the office being done by your boss who the next day want even be able to look you in the eye then the quilt by you towards your husband then your husband leaving cause you told him the truth you get fired have no where to live end up on the street selling you *** for cash,1 month later found in sleazy hotel room d e a d !!!!!! alternatively you will carry on with the most exciting affair that wil define your life and make you truly happy.

Answer 7

Assuming that he is flirting back, I would say you are both heading for disaster. When you lay down with dogs, you get up with fleas. You are risking your job, your marriage, your children etc. If you feel a need to cheat pick a social circle that is not connected to any of these things. If it does not work out, you may still be able to salvage what is dear to you.

Answer 8

that is playing with fire

if your boss tires of you then you could find yourself without a job as well as having alienated your spouse even further

i think both of you need to consider your marriage and your families - while you are flirting it means that neither of you are able to put your own homes first to try and sort out what is going on there

advice?

dont do it! nip it in the bud before it goes anywhere as it could almost certainly end in tears

Answer 9

I don't think that you should act on it until both you and your boss are divorced or separated from your partners........and if either of you have kids......i really think you should avoid each other as much as possible and go get some married counseling if your so unhappy with your partner........P.S. go find a new job if your having these kind of thoughts

Answer 10

You need to stop!!! NEVER mix business with pleasure. You are headed for destruction. If your boss is cheating WITH you he/she will cheat ON you. This could also jeopordize your career, which in turn affects your income. Also if you refuse your boss, you may be fired. I would NEVER EVER date someone on my job. That is a #1 no no.