(Stay at home moms?) I need some opinions please?

Question

I want to be a stay at home mom more than anything in the world. My husband wants to start our family right now. I need some honest opinions if we will be able to make it or not. He makes approx 2,600 a month. I figured we need 2,000 to pay all our necessary bills. This does not include food, gas etc. He wants this so bad, and keeps telling my we will be fine financially, but I don’t know. I trust him, but its a huge decision. What if we cant do it, and then I don’t have a job to go back to? I'm not sure how other families do it. We have never lived off of less than 3,000 a month, but we have always had extra spending money. Suggestions, thoughts, opinions please?

Answer 1

I've been blessed to be a stay-at-home mom for 14 years now. I would say try it. You'll have to make sacrifices in many areas of your life when you have a child and money is just one of them. Keep in mind what it will cost to pay a sitter, gas to and from work, work clothes, eating lunches out.... sometimes its better financially to stay at home. If money is still a problem try babysitting in your home. I would start with an older child, maybe one who needs watched if in 1/2 day kindergarten. Good luck to you.

Answer 2

I would seriously advise trying to wait on that, at least until you have some money saved up. From what you have mentioned, it seems like it will be difficult to do. With the 600 left over for food and gas, how much after that do you have for a baby. Then there's the child-rearing issues that need to be thoroughly discussed and you need to have a written plan of action, if you want to be comfortable. Do you have a house, a fenced in back yard, pets? Do you want your child or children to go to public or private school? Will you help your child go through colege? What if you have a special needs child or someone in the family has medical expenses or someone needs counseling? What if you have twins instead of one? Are you going to buy the expensive brand name clothing? What about if your child or children want to do things for fun that costs money (like camps, vacations, video games, birthday parties, etc.)? What if your husband loses his job or there is an environmental disaster? What about when each child becomes a teenager, do you want to get each one a used or new car, or have each one borrow the family car? Do you have a detailed plan B or C and a financial emergency plan and an extra expenses plan? You and your husband have a lot to take into consideration, so don't just rush into having children before making plans with your husband.
I am a stay at home with one child, he earns more than yours, and it is still difficult. Then there are others who earn way less than us with more children who still make it.
Financial strains in the marriage can make it tougher to stay together and leave both feeling frustrated and disatisfied.
But don't wait too long, though. When you have some money saved up (try to think enough to last you and your husband 6 months or more plus or times the number of children you plan to have). I would also try to have enough money to own my own house or have at least 20% down payment.
Just make sure that you and your husband continue to talk things out and make written detailed financial plans and budgets if you can before you have children.

Answer 3

hi
i have raised three well rounded human beings, having said that i would like to offer my option. i think if r smart enough to know how important I is for a parent to be home with the children then have faith you will figure out a way in which this can be done. sometimes i took in other children just 1 or 2 that pays well : )
Or if working a different shift than your husband (on a part time level u do not want to stress out. the children need your calmness) even if i means pumping gas or whatever. i had my degree and i felt there was no job i was too good for in terms that it meant that my children were with their parents instead of being warehoused and brought up by strangers. you must put things in there proper place. what matter most? i believe that once you answer that the rest will fall into place. have faith you are not alone...good luck

Answer 4

One child, $2600 income without food and gas etc? It could be a little cramped but if you do want this stay at home aspect the sacrifices won't outweigh the joy of watching your child grow.

I've worked most of my child rearing times, except for my last child which I stayed home for, for 10 months. I then returned to stay at home status about 13 years ago while my kids went from grade to high school.

I have 5 children and my husband loves his job which pays well enough that I don't have to worry about how we will make do. At times early on it was tough, learning to live differently than we had been doing. But, you weigh the pros and cons of your decision...more pros than cons decides it...you do what it is you know will be the best decision.

Besides, the right decision usually ends up showing itself anyway ...perhaps shortly after you decide to stay home your husband will earn a wage, bonus or something that was unexpected but most definitely appreciated...then you know you are doing the right thing.

Anytime a parent can be the caregiver of a child, it's a win-win situation...

Good luck and take care

Answer 5

I say.. do whatever makes you HAPPY. It isn't always about the money. Personally, I don't know where you live, so I wouldn't know the cost of living index down there, but probably if he makes enough to cover the bills, and you can sacrifice some money to do what you truly love and want to do, then go for it. A lot of stay at home moms are starting eBay businesses, to reel an an extra thousand or two every month, or doing other stay at home type jobs. Good luck

Answer 6

heh... you have a baby coming. Your expenses are about to double. He's gonna have to get a second job. His own baby wont recognize him because he'll be working all the time. He'll be constantly tired so he may have to start doing speed just to stay awake so he can keep working to pay the bills. Then he may start drinking to augment the negative side effects of the speed. Then he'll become irritable and then abusive to you and your child. You'll blame him for all the families problems, you'll ask for a divorce. You'll take half his money in court then take his child and leave the state so everything he's worked so hard for will be gone and his life will be ruined forever, but at least you wont have to go to work.

...either that or everything will be just fine.

Good Luck!

Answer 7

The best way to make it work is to do a small home day care. Take children in that are very close to your childrens age so That you have the supplies and experience needed for that age group. You can be home w/ your child and still make money. Just remember it is a buisness , so take the steps needed to make it the best situation for you and for the families you will be working with. Good luck...there is not a better reward than being w/ your child!!

Answer 8

I don't think it's realistic to live on the income you stated, especially when you want to have a kid, and tons of things come up that you have to pay for that you would never have dreamed of. I rec commend getting a part time job or maybe even starting a home day care with 1 or 2 other children. that way you can stay home, and be with your child, and work to make money and write tons of stuff off on your income taxes.

Answer 9

My wife stays at home while I work. The budget is often tight but we manage just fine. You need to carefully plan ahead for all expenses. You will not be able to shop or eat out as much but that's fine. If you monitor the budget carefully then you can easily adjust to your new spending level.

My wife takes ceramics classes part time to stay connected with friends and have something to do outside the house. You should find an activity, club, class or volunteer project that you enjoy so you have something ongoing outside the home.

Answer 10

i am a stay at home mom of 3....its all about budget...i go to 3 different grocery stores if i have to just to buy sale items(and use coupons).... clothes are always bought on saleand i shop around for the best deals...i buy lots on clearance (winter clothes for the next year in summer and summer clothes in winter-when they are cheaper). We only eat out once a month and its on Tuesdays when kids eat for free or at a reduced rate. If you budget wisely and don't spend money on frivalous things you will be just fine...its hard sometimes but my kids would rather be with me and I really enjoy getting to spend my days with them...it is trully a gift...you can always try it for a while and see how it would work...just put your pay aside and only use his to live off of. that way you can see if you can really do it and if you can't you still have your check...