He broke many of the promises that he made to me, and i can never trust what he tells me. I am scared that I act stand-off-ish around boys at school because I am scared that theyll be the same way? I've tried to talk to my father but it is no use.
2006-08-02 06:54:59 · 23 answers · asked by asdfjkl; 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Go to a therapist.
2006-08-02 06:58:50 · answer #1 · answered by Blunt Honesty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a dad is difficult. Being a male is not easy as well. there are things u can't hide inside urself u will end up a loner like me.
don push urself to hard fing some friends u can trust to talk to. if they are sensible enough, they should know that they need to help u to find a way or two but in case they couldn't do anything, u got something off ur chest and will be able to breath better. (Win -win situation)
As for the guys in ur school..... Take ur time u will be able to find a suitable talking partner just don be too worried. i always love this sentence...
Trust is to be earn not given.
take care now girly
2006-08-02 07:08:32 · answer #2 · answered by Headache 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your father is a lost cause, and I'm sorry for you to have to deal with a father like that. But don't assume that just because your father is unreliable it means every guy on the planet is unreliable. The reason you push boys away is because your father has hurt you in the past and you think you're better off pushing them away before they have a chance to hurt you. It's a good idea to be wary around the guys because some of them only want one thing from you (sex), however, you have to learn to trust the guys who demonstrate trustworthiness. It's going to take you a while to do it, so take your time and if you find yourself in one of those situations where you want to push a guy away even though he has never given you a reason not to trust him, step back and think it through before you kick a really good guy to the curb. Good luck!
2006-08-02 07:03:41 · answer #3 · answered by sarge927 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are some people (men and women) who can't be trusted. Unfortunately for you, your father is one of them. You have to realize that it has nothing to do with you. It is his flaw, not yours. What you need to do is just take things slow and easy with boys. Don't rush into any relationships. Since you are still in school, I assume you are still a minor. There is no rush for you to have a relationship. And the younger you get into a relationship, the more likely you will be hurt. so spend this time focusing on your friends, your school work, your interests. Develop yourself into the type of woman that would attract an honest. loyal, loving man. Once you are the type of woman that a good man would want, you will find that good man who will treat you right your whole life, being loyal and honest. And over the years, you will find your trust for him growing.
Good luck to you, and I'm sorry you had to have a father who has not treated you right. But you deserve to be treated right. So hold out for the right man. He IS out there. I promise you. I have been married for 18 years to a wonderful, loyal honest man. I had a similar background as yours. It will all work out. Just make good choices for yourself and all will turn out. Just make sure and marry a good man so that your children don't have to go through what yuo've gone through.
2006-08-02 07:03:34 · answer #4 · answered by Mistress T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun... I almost dont know what to say here. Its hard to trust people at all, but when you've already got trust issues, its even harder. Id cut my dad out. When he makes plans, DONT get all eager or anxious about it. If it happens, great, if he backs out, then there is no regret. Some of the biggest disappointments in life come from mens actions towards us as women. But you have to at least be willing to put yourself out there. the next time you feel like you are being stand offish, try doing something that you normally wouldnt do. Whenever I get nervous around people, I smile alot. People are naturally happier around happy looking people. Try it.
2006-08-02 07:00:55 · answer #5 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not so that. These other boys are not your father. Trust is a person to person thing. Trust is earned or lost by that person. You can´t say I don´t trust ___________ because he or she did something to break the bonds of trust. Trust in small things first, then increase the levels of trust with the boys. Maybe ask the girls at school or in your community who is trustworthy.
2006-08-02 07:01:08 · answer #6 · answered by thebulktiny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your father is who he is, and these boys are who they are. Not everyone is the same, and you are missing out on some prospective good friendships. It is possible to move on from the way you have been treated at home and find support and affection within other relationships. It takes time but take it slowly and rebuild your experiences with and replace them with more positive ones. I did.
2006-08-02 07:02:45 · answer #7 · answered by xbkw46 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must let go. I did. Eventually, you will learn to trust again. The wonder will always be in the back of you mind though. But you will learn to trust someone. You must give people a chance.
2006-08-02 06:59:41 · answer #8 · answered by kennydownes187 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm an adult dealing w/ the same issues girl. I have been praying about it. What I try to do is, when it comes to guys if they can't keep their word in with little things (calling you, showing up on time to pick you up), then they won't keep their word with big things either. So pay attention to a man's actions not his words thats what my natural dad's lies have taught me.
2006-08-02 07:00:56 · answer #9 · answered by Love United 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your dad might have a reasons for his actions but don't have that effected you life have fun try to trust boy but don't be stupid go a a date or to make some friends who are boy . not all boy are like your dad
2006-08-02 07:07:09 · answer #10 · answered by the spacing out queen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
instead of dating boys why not be only friends so you can slowly work on the trust thing without pushing your comfert zone to far. take it very slow
2006-08-02 06:59:51 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋