Okay, I am 18 and I have a close friend that I look up to a whole bunch. She is 27. We do lots of things together like shopping and hanging out. She is such an awesome person and is always positive and fun to be around. I like to be around her a lot b cuz she is so full of life. I always try and call her every day or so to see whats up b cuz i want to keep our friendship strong, but I sometimes wonder if she gets tired of me calling her a lot. But then if i try to back off and not call her so much I feel like she might think I dont care about her that much ne more. I dont know, it just seems weird to me b cuz i dont want her thinking that i am too busy for her b cuz im not, i just want to give her space. PLEASE HELP! LOL Oh, and if we dont hear from each other over a period of just a few days or so, she always says something like "what have u been doin?" like she missed me calling.
2006-08-02 06:09:08 · 43 answers · asked by purple_lilly_padz 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
It sounds like the friendship is good and strong but that you're just over-analyzing! It's perfectly ok not to talk to each other every day and to have other interests eyond the scope of just the two of you.
When she asks what you've been up to after a few days' absence, it's just a logical conversation starter; I don't know that it has any more meaning than what it is.
Because she is older, I think she may be a bit more confident in your friendship and not need the level of reassurance that you do. Friendships are strong because of the shared experiences, the trust you share and the comfort level you feel; not because of frequency of contact. Relax, and don't worry so much. :)
2006-08-02 06:18:28 · answer #1 · answered by Word Game Addict 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You are probably doing the right thing by giving her space. she more than likely appreciates your friendship, but when my friends call me everyday i get annoyed. There is nothing to say when you talk constantly every single day. It also bothers me when my friends say " where in the hell have you been" after like a day of not talking. If she does that though than maybe she misses you when you don't call her for a couple of days. The best way to be sure is to just let her call you. I mean, call her but let her get back to you instead of bugging her. Hope this helps, even though it probably wont since you already know all this stuff.
2006-08-02 06:19:13 · answer #2 · answered by Tamara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You seem to have a really close friendship. Don't think you're over doing anything. If you feel like calling her, call her. Nothing wrong in that. She's given the choice of whether she wants to talk to you or not and it seems like she does enjoy talking to you. You're not weird, just seems like you guys have a special bond and thats what true friendship is about. Enjoy it, the relationship and the time you can spend together. Life has a way of changing faster than you know it.
2006-08-02 06:19:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may have a little bit of a crush on this older friend. Nothing wrong with that. Try not to obsess so much about the situation; if she didn't like you calling so much one would think she would tell you. She's probably flattered by the attention; who doesn't like to be admired & looked up to! Maybe try not to call EVERY day; over time and as you grow & mature, the relationship will sort itself out.
2006-08-02 06:15:15 · answer #4 · answered by Nefertiti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no i dont do this but yeah i had to spend a month with my best friend in puerto rico and i felt that was too much time together and after we got back home i wanted to give her space. well i know u feel like ur invading her time but calling everyday is a little too much. at least i think so. if u 2 both dont think its too much then dont worry and just keep calling. if ur in real doubt then just tell her the truth and be like am i bothering u and stuff (shes ur best friend she should understand)
good luck
2006-08-02 06:16:15 · answer #5 · answered by shorty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well when I call any of my friends they ring me the next time and then me again. We do it because a) our phone bills tend to pile up if we didn't have the system and b)like you said, sometimes friends can get tired of talking to each other everyday. I say just call her and wait for her to call you back in a few days because you seem like you're the only one who puts effort in your friendship.
2006-08-02 06:33:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are obsessed with this person. Just give her some space. You are friends...she will not think you don't care about her if you don't call for a few days. She has a phone too, so if she hasn't heard from you and she really wants to talk to you...she'll call you.
2006-08-02 06:16:46 · answer #7 · answered by Lab Rat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's a suggestion that will definitely work. Next time you are in a conversation with her....when the opportunity seems natural or right, start laughing and say something like "you know, it just dawned on me that I call you all the time....you're probably thinking god this girl is a pest....(laugh more)....then say something like...honestly, If you feel like I am calling too much, or like I'm around too much, just let me know.....When I really like someone I tend to go overboard with wanting to hang out with them, because I enjoy their company so much. I totally understand if you need a little space from me being around all the time. Just let me know and it's cool.....I'm not trying to be a pest, I just have alot of fun with you and like being around you...that's all" If she doesn't protest about what you're saying but just kind of chuckles about it, then it's probably safe to say that she doesn't really want you around so much. If she says something like "oh my god no....I like hanging out with you, you're not pestering me", then it's probably safe to assume you can spend as much time with her as you want. Hope you try it and find that it works for you......one way or the other, you'll have the answer to your question.
2006-08-02 06:29:23 · answer #8 · answered by typicalguy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok try taking her out to a nice fun place wer u girls HANG OUT an like ask her politly tat if ur bothering her the ans frm her might be a no jus tell her tat "if she is free to give u a call so tat u dont think ur disturbing her an she feels good abt u... all da best may ur frnd... :-)
2006-08-02 06:19:18 · answer #9 · answered by Madhavan M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be a good friend...don't climb up her rectum, but don't play dead either. Why don't you try calling every other day or two days out of three. Give her a little space, but not too much that she thinks you're cooling off, but still be there for her as a friend.
2006-08-02 06:13:38 · answer #10 · answered by AlloAllo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋