Ok, well, my ex told me that he is talking to someone else and that he is getting to know her. I asked him if he liked her and he told me yes. He told me that he is not sure about her becoming his girlfriend. The thing is that he says that he doesn't want me to stop being his friend. he knows that I love him and he says that he still feels something for me. I don't know what to do and I would like some advice. I am really hurt by this and I don't want be in the way of him and her now that I have found out. HELP!
2006-08-02 06:02:52 · 18 answers · asked by Lessons_in_life10 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
let him go... stop depending on him and "pretending" ur friends when ur not!! ther'es feelings there, don't deny them. when u have to hide ur feelings w/ someone, there is already an unhealthy relationship there. he is using you...whether or not he realizes it or not, he is keeping u there cuz he KNOWS u have feelings!! that is not nice at all.. if u really care about him, let him go and meet other people. let him see what life is without you. don't take "friends w/ benefits" or whatever from him if you love him, cuz u need to set boundaries for what YOU want in a relationship; a man who takes care of u, respects u, loves u, makes u feel whole, makes u feel wonderful and attractive, and makes u want him to feel the same about you!! don't take any less than that, and u will filter out all the bad guys and the one who is left will be the one who is GOOD for you, not just right for you. always look for a healthy, positive relationship; love w/ pain and suffering leads to an unhappy and unsatisfied relationship... love w/ hope and happiness will lead to positive, healthy and satisfied relationship!!
2006-08-02 06:09:01 · answer #1 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that maybe you should take some time to process all that has happened. It sounds to me that he is concerned about your feelings. Unless he has done something that warrants you to dislike him then I think you should remain his friend in do time. This all depends on how much it hurts you to be around him knowing the situation. If you love him then you will want to see him happy whether it is with you or someone else. It sucks but you maybe losing a good friend if you turn him away and good friends are hard to find. Keep your head up. As bad as it seems now with time you will feel a whole lot better about things I'm sure.
2006-08-02 13:10:02 · answer #2 · answered by Right_Stuff66 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well missy, the only thing i have to say is that being friends with your "ex" NEVER works. Your situation is a great example for my theory. You still have feelings for him, but you aren't together, but you 2 are free to date. Of course you will get jealous, then if he hooks up with someone you will just end up hating him. If it is absolutely necessay to be friends, then be distant friends. Friends that say Hi and bye and ask how u and the family are doing. Don't do the whole confiding in each other thing. Sounds like you guys are a bit young, so i'd say you guys need to branch out and date other peeps. If it's meant to be then one day in the future you will find each other again. You need time to mature and experience life to the fullest.
2006-08-02 13:10:22 · answer #3 · answered by Noah's Mommy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well there is an easy solution...it just takes some getting used to...i'm going through the same thing....broke up with my b/f a month or so ago....and we have managed to stay friends so far and i asked him if and when he moves on if we will still be friends and he said yes....because his new g/f should be able to accept he has friends..and this applies to you too...you shouldn't feel like you have to go because you will get in thr way..if he has told you that he wants to be friends than i think he really means it because often guys won't keep someone around if they really don't want to...i think you will always have a special bond since you dated so you will always be close so i say that you stay friends because his new girl should be able to accept the fact that he has friends that are girls...
2006-08-02 13:09:46 · answer #4 · answered by EvEl_LiL_kArEbEaR 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats a typical male thing to do .He is tryin to eat his cake and have it . he wants you and wants her too but really dosent know what he wants and if he can have both of you , trust me he'll take it .
the fact that he told you he liked her probabaly can mean that he is already intimate with her but is trying to spare you and your feelings the details. tell him to move on and do this his thing why you move on and do yours. i know its hard especailly cuz you sound like you love him but you just have to do it because if he feels he can get away with having two honeys at his side then he'll keep doing it and you'll only get hurt and stuck in a momen that you cant get out of.
Remember, "a man will only do to a woman what she lets him to "
2006-08-02 13:15:40 · answer #5 · answered by Scorpiogirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u could be friends nothings wrong with that but eventually if he stars liming the next girl it could cause problems besiding that it seems live he is playing greedy because it seems like he want both of u an the only reason he may want u around is in case things don';t work out between him an this new girl
2006-08-02 13:11:57 · answer #6 · answered by vicsha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know that it will be hard but you need to let him know that even if he gets a new girlfriend that ya'll will still be friends even if its not close friends. if he really does care alot about you then he will end up coming back to you. so just hang in there and trust me when i say it will not be easy to do!!!!
2006-08-02 13:20:33 · answer #7 · answered by sweet heart 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Humm, I would say that you two can still be friends, but he can date the other person if he really wants to. If you both love one another, but can't be in a relationship, it is for the best.
2006-08-02 13:08:38 · answer #8 · answered by anom. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u loved him and durig that time u had lts of memories , also u cant force other peson to love you.so its better to end this love relationship and one more thing remember that the other person is not sure about his own feelings....if one day he again comes to you and says that he still loves you that means he is not loyal to anybody..........whatever happens,hapens for the best.also u cant leave him all of the suddden so try to b normal and try not to talk abt your previous days.slowly and gradualy u will definately come out of it...............may god bless you
2006-08-02 13:13:55 · answer #9 · answered by mini 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
walk away with what little pride and self esteem he has left you.... he has made it plane , very plane how he feels about you......if you feel you are in love with him, treat yourself right and go..... do not torture your heart this way....... he is using you as a back up, NOT a friend...... he has plainly put you in the *stand by* position, and if you continue to let him, you will pay a high price for his selfishness........ DON'T !!! make a clean break and run like the wind........ find a man who likes and appreciates and adores YOU for who YOU are............ God bless
2006-08-02 13:09:22 · answer #10 · answered by Annie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋