I want to be in a serious relationship that will hopefully lead to marriage. I'm not sure he wants the same with me. I've brought up the question of marriage before, and yes he someday wants to get married and have kids, but he's quite paranoid, coz marriages are 'boring'. I'm 25. He's 32. We're different races and his parents wouldn't approve of me. Should I walk?
2006-08-02 03:05:24 · 17 answers · asked by lori 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't walk, RUN LIKE HELL!
After 2.5 years if he doesn't know he loves you , he's not the one.
2006-08-02 03:10:59 · answer #1 · answered by HappyTom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you bothered that he doesnt tell you, he loves you? I know i would and for me that would be a major problem. Forget the marriage issue and lets talk about that pesky love issue. Have you ever heard of the book...he's just not that into you....i suggest you invest some time and read that book. Hunny, sometimes the answer you are seeking is right infront of your face and the signs are there. People are afraid of giving up.. and i like to say, you arent giving up, your making sure you get what you want. You want something he most likely will never give you.......and sadly enough you know that. It doesnt hurt to sit him down and tell him how you feel and ask him to do the same.Who knows, he might tell you the answer you been looking for. No one can tell you what to do, walk or dont walk...ultimately its your happiness on the line, not ours.
2006-08-02 10:30:47 · answer #2 · answered by dlite1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know know what it going to be like for 2 1/2 years being with him and knowing that he has no idea what the expression means. He has learned from his family. And he said it clearly that quite paranoid and coz marriages are boring. even his family didn't approved you.
You are so darn free to walk a way. If your boyfriend said no no I will marry you I will.. Don't becasue 2 1/2 years haven't been change since then. so Ifyou want to be married to a man who tell you how much he loves you everday, making love to you showing how good you feel in bed, and kiss you wake in the morning and kiss off to work come home kiss. A man that Loves you don't care about his Family Approve of you. Still want to married you and be with you, A man who stand up and protect you and family (you and futrue baby) and A man who work so hard on the job and come home and still work hard to clean house take care of you and you to the same as team work, A man who loves to be married to you knowing that only both of you forever and work this marriage last lifetime. A man say "Honey, you look beautiful, your smile, ohh I love your heart, and I greatful to have you in my life and how special you are to me, Did you know I love you more than any world any people on this earth love you? I would buy you world for you, I do anything make this life together to share to do anything to make it happen" Yes there will be ups and downs but learning to commucate and express how you both feel if there something to say is good or bad didn't matter long as both learn to commucate. When baby is born you know that husband is a great father to the child and really give and tell kids I love you so much and play with them and take them fun places what mom and dad do.
If you agree all above, then you will find someone better than him. Why and how I know I am the guy who Married my wife for 9 years and have 2 small children and baby would not be due to March 2007. I am the guy All Above feels the way about my own family. I end my real family no longer talking since9 years becasue I have my own family and it will be with me forever. don't care what happen to my other family. My wife is 1/2 Mexican and 1/2 white. and I am full white and I don't care what race she is I love her in and outside smiling.
so hope this helps. and This a man true feelings about his wife. and if you agree then there a man out there like me who want to do the same thing to you. Not to this bore paranoid guy and not good health and thank good you didn'tmarried him. so you are free to leave you didn't sign no contract to must stay with him for 10 years or something. so I am deaf and My wife is hearing and my 2 kids are hearing. big different but didn't stop us loving so much eachother.
2006-08-02 10:20:37 · answer #3 · answered by greenbaypackers1920 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he has commitment issues. I would set a time for him to decide what he wants to do, then stick to it. If after that time, he's still noncommittal then walk. Ask him if he will go to counseling with you, to try to get to the root of why he won't commit. So his parents won't approve--at first, but after a while, when they see how happy you are, they'll come around.
2006-08-02 10:14:17 · answer #4 · answered by adbosch1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's been 2.5 years and he can't even say "I love you"... it's time to walk. All you're doing right now is warming the sheets.
His avoidance of marriage aside, not being able to express emotions to you is a major problem.
2006-08-02 10:13:05 · answer #5 · answered by Kiari 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he hasn't told you that he intends on marrying YOU then do not stay. He said he wants to get married and have kids, but he's paranoid, if he's in love with you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you (regardless of his parents approval) he would not have any fear and you would be married by now.
2006-08-02 10:11:37 · answer #6 · answered by Lovinlife 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself this: "Am I willing to marry someone who is so emotionally out of touch that he cannot express love for me?"
If the answer is "yes," then stick with him, but you give up the right to whine about him being emotionally distant.
If the answer is "no," then you know what to do: Find someone who has developed the emotional maturity and self-confidence to be OK expressing his love for you appropriately.
2006-08-02 10:11:56 · answer #7 · answered by Dr. Doom 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, believe me it is not worth having a relationship with someone who has different beliefs and customs, to tell you the truth it is a real pain in the ***! It is best to have and be with someone that you can truly relate to. Don't get yourself into a situation that is not worth being in if you don't have too!
2006-08-02 11:24:00 · answer #8 · answered by bigred 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is still not commited to you after 2.5 years than let him go! If his parents approval is so important to him and he doesn't have it now who says that will change down the road!
2006-08-02 10:11:30 · answer #9 · answered by Sonja B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes walk... Your relationship is stuck... If you don't like how things are going in your life then you need to change them.. no one else will do this for you.. only you control your happiness... Find someone who is willing to commit and not be ashamed to have you for a wife..
2006-08-02 10:14:26 · answer #10 · answered by cinsaint1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its time too sit downe with this due of your deams ans set things straight here with im, do it as calmly as you can dont choke or, let him do thje lovey dovey thing take his hand look in to his eyes and tell him what you have tod us if he dosent say he loves you then, tell him too hiot the highwayy, etc, againn, do it when you aare ready take the phone off thhe hook warn friends not too barge in, and lay it straight on the line etc, this may be your most important pice of converstion ever remember you are buliding a foundatioon here posibly for rst of lves etc.
2006-08-02 10:12:09 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋