I have been maried for 14 years and have one 12 year old. But we had been fighting all through and have been very close to divorce many times. Now I hav ethis young lady. She is 18 year younger but seems to love me and wants to live with me. I am wondering will it work.
2006-08-02 01:50:05 · 24 answers · asked by The curious 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I believe that if your willing to make it work and the young lady is mature enough and you both really care ALOT about one another then you should give it a try as you will never know until you do. I just got married in April and my husband is actually 18 years older then me and we have a great relationship and friendship. We have been together for 5 years and I think that I will always be in love with him as he has changed my heart forever. I don't want to miss lead you either our relationship has not always been a walk in the park either, weve had our ups and downs as any couple. I think that with alot of couples who have an age difference they start to find that they do not have things in common (as far as music, hobbies, certain interests, were there at in there life and what there really looking for) but were lucky enough that we do not have those issues, which some people at first try to over look (or try to lie to themselves) those issues. Just be honest with yourself and her, maybe just date for awhile if your not 100% sure, as there is no need to rush into things especially after a divorce. Your heart and soul needs time to heal after that whether we realize it or not, some people (not saying you cause I obviously do not know you) tend to lose themselves when they get married. Find out who you really are and what you really want and if this young lady really wants to be with you she will understand and take the pace that you need. I can say that one thing that we did was let things come naturally and didn't try to push each other. Well, Good luck to you and if in your heart you love or really care about this young lady then go for it, why not life is to short. One tip - Just don't dad her, that can feel a little creepy! :o)
2006-08-02 02:40:25 · answer #1 · answered by Susie Q 1 · 6⤊ 1⤋
Excuse Me!!!
You are married at this moment and have a 12 year old and your asking us about marrying at person 18 years younger than you.
I think she might be to old for you. You might be older in years but your more like a 12 year old. You and your wife have been fighting? I wonder why.
Before you marry the 18 year old make sure you tell her you will be looking for a younger model in 14 years or so.
2006-08-02 02:01:29 · answer #2 · answered by Mit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have seen both plays acted out.
One girl was 21, the man was 42. She was beautiful, gorgeous, and motherly. He was handsome, hardworking, and very well kept (physically). They've been together for about 3 years. Everything seems to be going great.
And I've met a man who is 47 dating a girl who is 25. Things didn't go as smoothly.
So if you're 18 years older than her, you pretty much lived your life. You're a father/lover/mentor figure to her, all three in one. Be careful to not misuse this "power." She's learning stuff, you know?
Plus, when she turns 35, the age at which women reach their sexual peak, you'll be 53.
Think about that.
Or better yet: When she's 45, when she's a full-grown woman with a better understanding of who she is, you'll be 63.
Average male life expectancy in this country is 62.
Just think about that.
And when you're done thinking about it, decide to...
1. Go ahead and create a great relationship.
or...
2. Don't.
2006-08-02 01:59:43 · answer #3 · answered by Mario E 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be frank, i guess only a few percentage of couples like your case can work out.
Whether to try it out or not, its up to you. But do you still love your current wife and child? If not why you both keep quarrelling yet still together, only close to divorce only?
Sometimes love is the feeling of just a snap of finger...18 years apart. Will you feel unbalance many years down the road? when your wife still young and you are weakly sick, staying at home? Will you give her pressure, if a young man is going after her and you know you are on the losing side on your age differences?If maybe you will, then give up on her..for her and for your own good.
2006-08-02 02:03:56 · answer #4 · answered by barelyahrie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there is a very good possibility of marriage seeing as how I am 13 years younger than my fiance (husband after Feb 2007)! Just make sure you never make her feel incapable of making wise decisions or knocking her for her youth! Oh, and keep in mind it's new for her so you have to go through all the special details and moments all over again and never get so comfortable you take her for granted!
2006-08-02 03:13:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So, in other words, you're an old man playing around on his wife with a young girl? Why don't you put your energy into your marriage and stop playing on the side? This girl will get tired of you and your kid sooner or later and move on. You're living in a fantasy land as well as being a significant CHEATER! You will certainly get what you are giving out in life....and for you...if you marry this girl, she'll replace you and take your butt to the cleaners, like you deserve!
2006-08-02 02:04:02 · answer #6 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only time will tell if her maturity can stand up to dating a older man. It will only work if the maturity level is on a even playing field.
Being 18 years apart is a big gap which means when you would have been entering your first year of college, she would have still been in the sperm count.
2006-08-02 01:57:33 · answer #7 · answered by words from the heart 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I have a coworker who is 47 and his fiance is 20, they've known each other for like 10 years and have been together for 2. They seem to be really happy, but you have to be prepared for the criticism. But yes, I believe its possible.
2006-08-02 01:54:04 · answer #8 · answered by Domi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're married, deal with with that relationship first! Otherwise age shouldn't be an issue unless you make it one. My boss has been married for twenty years to a man twenty years older that she is. By all appearances they are a loving, happy couple, so it can work. Good luck with your problem.
2006-08-02 01:56:25 · answer #9 · answered by ore2nc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If my guess is correct, you seem to have quite a lot of money! why else would a young girl stick around an old married man?
No, she doesn't love you!
No, it won't work!
And if you care about her, you won't let her reputation be ruined by the fact that she is involved with a married man and helped take his family apart. And think about your kid! How will you answer to him/her?
2006-08-02 01:55:30 · answer #10 · answered by Foxy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋