My husband admitted to me that he dreamed of having sex with another woman last night. He says that he did not see a face only the body. We looked it up on dreammoods.com to see what it may mean, and it stated that he may be dissatisfied with our physical relationship. At the point I turned around and asked him if that was so, and he immediately said, "yes, our sex is baadd", with emphasis on the word bad. Now, he immediately saw the hurt look on my face, and backtracked saying, "I didn't mean it like that, I meant that we have been having sex at least every other day, and now we've gone two days without having sex". I'm like, 2 days? Are you for real? That is what makes our sex life bad? For some reason, I don't believe him...What do you think? Does he really think that having sex with me is bad?
2006-08-02 00:56:05 · 21 answers · asked by candy0813 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ok, ok, I was being dramatic. I know that our marriage is not DOOMED, lol. I'm just worried that he is not happy with our sex life, even though I have proved over and over again, that I am willing to do ANYTHING THAT HE WANTS ME TO DO! And I do mean Anything!
2006-08-02 01:10:33 · update #1
It certainly is not doomed; he's just a little frustrated. To dream about a faceless woman that way is just an indication that he wants more sex than he's getting. Even if it were someone he could identify, it would just mean that was kicking around his subconscious. You can't be upset with him for having uncontrolled thoughts in his sleep--he didn't dream it ON PURPOSE.
As far as saying that things are bad, I think he just isn't getting enough of it. To a person who wants more, not getting enough DOES seem bad. I understand what he means, and so would you if you thought about it calmly. Let's take it to the extreme--if you only did it once a month, but it was really good when you did it, would that mean your sex life was good? How about once every six months? How often can matter as much as what is that you're doing. Both quality and quantity matter.
Think of it as food. You wouldn't be happy to have every meal be a five course gourmet dinner, if you could only eat once a week, would you? On the other hand, if could eat any time, but only stale bread and water, that would also be no fun.
He's fine, and so are you. Just let him know you are ready whenever he is. Sometimes you can be a gourmet chef, and other times a short order cook. Just don't leave the boy hungry.
2006-08-02 02:24:17 · answer #1 · answered by homebuyer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
men are horn dogs they think about it constantly and want it constantly.So when they dont get it for a few days they think its the end of the world.But with your case when you asked him if what the dream moods said was true and he said yes it was bad then seen how hurt you were and back tracked he was probaly telling the truth and spoke before he thought about what he said and then it dawned on him after words that the comment hurt you and tryed to cover it up.I dont think your marriage is doomed.Sex is just a part of the marriage as long as you are doing ok in other aspects you will be fine.You and your husband need to sit down and talk about how you can fix your sex life.Whether its trying new positions,being more spontaneous or getting some toys.You guys may be stuck in a rut and hubby is just getting tired of the same old sae old and just wants to spice it up.But you will never fix it if you dont talk with him and try and fix it.I wish you guys the best of luck
2006-08-02 01:14:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did your husband admit to a dream of having sex with another woman? How in the heck did that conversation every come up? Lots of questions here with many possibilities.
Sounds like a conversation has started about your married sex life. Good start. You need to keep talking about it. It sounds like you opened it up and then you reacted a way he didn't expect.
Keep talking. You might find out that he wants more of you in different more fulfilling ways for you both.
Don't shut him or yourself out. Talk. And Don't get shocked so he back tracks again.
Talk Talk and Talk some more
2006-08-02 01:11:45 · answer #3 · answered by Mit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think your marriage is doomed. I also don't think it's the frequency or 'quality' of the sex that is the problem. Most likely it's the pattern that he's having an issue with. People who are married (especially for a long time), can get into the 'same old, same old' rut.
Try something different. If you're not sure what he would like or what he would consider too far left field, ask him what his one-on-one fantasies are.
2006-08-02 01:16:08 · answer #4 · answered by Avid 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about your marriage being doomed, but you really have to sit down with your husband and talk about in depth. Ask him what's wrong with your sex life etc. Then try work out a solution that solves the problem and keeps you both happy.
2006-08-02 01:02:49 · answer #5 · answered by revoltix 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
marriage is not a federal difficulty. a few states have legalized homosexual marriage. such a lot republicans think, as do i, that the difficulty will have to be settled inside each and every state. conservatives think within the first modification, so your moment factor is undoubtedly ludicrous. for those who care such a lot approximately man or woman freedom, why could you aid the democratic get together? we are gong to have a wellbeing care procedure now in which the IRS may have entry in your personal clinical documents, and they'll be those who approve or reject any clinical systems you may also or won't get for the relaxation of your lifestyles. Not one republican voted for that. obama care will create extra employees with out wellbeing coverage. employers who've lower than 50 staff will now not be obligated to hide their staff. Guess what they are going to do?
2016-08-28 14:02:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
discuss about his likes and dislikes of sex.
step by step u question him,while forplaying the bodies and when in the extreme mood of his,ask him his fantasisis,and from then try for those steps carefully, if ur physical strength is no good,try for herbal or ayurvedic medicines, if u r in stress of other works and do not concenterate in be,try to remove that with the help of yoga, an indian excercises philosophy,which the world follows,get details of YOGA and AYURVEDAthru net,get details and analyse the weakness and follow the steps to do, and also take care of
ur general mood at the time of making sex
2006-08-02 01:06:04 · answer #7 · answered by mukesh a 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he made up the dream just to get the conversation started. At least he's still talking to you and now you know what his needs are. Now you need to tell him what your needs are. Just be glad he didn't cheat with a real girl like my hubby did.
BTW. Sex is like pizza. It's never bad.
2006-08-02 01:02:20 · answer #8 · answered by vitamin D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds more like you are making a bigger deal out of this than is necessary ! It was a dream after all. I think his answer was due to being "put on the spot" with your question ! What if YOU were to have a dream like his? Would you still question your relationship? Remember..... IT WAS JUST A DREAM......they aren't controllable !
2006-08-02 01:05:10 · answer #9 · answered by Beaumeader 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rememer he is a man and they say things that they dont mean or dont mean to sound as bad as they have said them.
Dont thnk your marriage is doomed talk about it what you want from him and ask what he wants from you. he might just have a high sex drive dont worry about it try and up yours if you can. But talk that is important good luck
2006-08-02 01:01:17 · answer #10 · answered by dizzymooo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋