2006-08-01 15:54:59 · 5 answers · asked by longbean 2 in Games & Recreation ➔ Other - Games & Recreation
I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out.
A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.
Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.
I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.
2006-08-01 16:00:47 · answer #1 · answered by ilse72 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
blonde wanted to go ice fishing. She'd seen many books on the
subject, and finally getting all the necessary tools together, she
made for the ice.
After positioning her comfy footstool, she started to make a circular
cut in the ice. Suddenly, from the sky, a voice boomed, "THERE ARE
NO FISH UNDER THE ICE."
Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a thermos of
cappuccino, and began to cut yet another hole. Again from the
heavens the voice bellowed, "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE."
The blonde, now worried, moved away, clear down to the opposite end
of the ice. She set up her stool once more and tried again to cut
her hole. The voice came once more, "THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE."
She stopped, looked skyward, and said, "Is that you, Lord?"
The voice replied, "NO, THIS IS THE MANAGER OF THE HOCKEY RINK."
2006-08-01 16:03:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
A man named Sardaji saw a house on fire. He quickly ran into the house and saved some of them.
But he was caught arrested.
Do you Know whu??????????????????????????????????????
Because, the people saved by sardaji were the firemen!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-08-02 00:24:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
the doctor told the blond that she needed more fiber so she went to the mall to shop for clothes. STUPID!!!!!
2006-08-01 16:13:41 · answer #4 · answered by :) K-smiles 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa the only thing i got is nothing
2006-08-01 16:00:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋