Or does it take more than that to make a marriage work? I am really struggling right now in my marriage, and would just like some opinions. Do you think if two people love each other that is enough to make it work, or do you need more?
2006-08-01 09:48:59 · 46 answers · asked by manda61905 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It takes more than love...respect comes first and foremost. I too struggled in my marriage, I am now divorced (and HAPPY)...please, please remember this...if you remember NOTHING else on here...
ONE PERSON CANNOT SAVE A MARRIAGE...it takes two, it takes both parties giving it their all...
I wish you the very best of luck honey..
Gentle hugs, Marilyn
2006-08-01 09:54:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, love is not all that you need in a marriage. A marriage is about so much more. Love is needed as a foundation but that is all it is. It takes trust, communication, sharing, and so much more to build a complete and lasting marriage. Look at this way, a person may love someone but is it really all you need if that same person doesn't contribute to the marriage or doesn't share their life with you, or cheats on you? No, it takes a lot of things to make up a marriage including love.
2006-08-01 09:54:59 · answer #2 · answered by rkrell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, love is the main ingredient in a marriage, but marriage isn't just love, it consists of communication, understanding, honesty, and being faithful. Marriage is hard work, with just love it isn't enough, and remember in order to make the marriage work it takes 2 people to make it work not just one. One person will never be able to make the marriage work because it takes 2 people to get married. When there are problems rise in a marriage, you have to talk it out and solve the problem you can't solve it alone. Sometimes divorce isn't the answer unless it has to be done, it's best to work out the problem first rather than getting a divorce. Remember the day you got married, it's 2 of you became 1, so 2 ppl need to work out the problems together.
Best of luck
2006-08-01 09:54:47 · answer #3 · answered by superboredom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been married and divorced, and I learned the hard way that it takes more to hold a marriage together then just love. you have to show love, speak love. you have to work as a team, talk to eachother, trust eachother. You can't fight against eachother. i don't know what is going wrong in your marriage but if you still have love that is a strong base to build off of. I say talk to eachother,and really talk. About everything, not while your eatching tv, or having the kids run around but when you are sitting in front of eachother. You need to share these feelings with your husband before it gets to late, there is always time to do something about it. Maybe seek a counsler or I have been reading a book called the 5 love languages by Gary Chapman, and it has helped the way that I communicate with my BF. It teaches you how to talk to your spouse, it breaks down who they are emtionaly. It is a very good book. Anything is worth a shot. i wish you the best of luck and hope that this works out for you both.
2006-08-01 10:01:37 · answer #4 · answered by Jolee N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage IS hard work.
Love isn't going to be the only thing holding you together. Chances are there are times that you can't even figure out how to love your spouse!
1. Read Gary Chapman's book on the Five Love Languages. Also read Dave Ramsey's book on Finicial Success.
2. Communicate. Find out where you two are falling. Is it money? Time? What?
3. If you need to, go to a marriage counselor. There's no shame in making your marriage a success, even if requires outside help.
What is MOST important is that it's a mutual committment to help this marriage. It's time to become a team and work together as two adults in a relationship.
Love is not going to solve everything. People who think the honeymoon stage lasts forever are trying to fool themselves.
2006-08-01 09:54:17 · answer #5 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are several keys to a successful marriage.
1) Be commited
to each other and to making the marriage work.
2) Don't withhold love and affection
or use it as a weapon to get your own way.
3) Listen to one another.
Keep the lines of communication open.
Few things can be more detrimental to a marriage than the refusal of one of the partners to discuss problems.
Work it out together if you can and if not, seek outside help.
4) Don't neglect your spouse.
5) Come to an agreement about finances.
(Money can cause problems too)
6) Take care of your health.
So that you can enjoy each other for many years to come.
7) Give each other room for personal and individual growth.
(For their own likes and dislikes, etc.)
8) Be willing to say "I'm sorry".
Truly mean it and try to make improvements.
9) Be willing to forgive.
For when they are wrong.
10) Hold your spouse in high esteem.
(Make positive remarks about them to friends and family)
Those are just a few of many, many, many keys to a successful marriage.
If this is not something the two of you can handle on your own, which would be perfectly acceptable and nothing to be ashamed or guilty about, discuss seeking marriage counseling.
I hope my advice helped.
Take care!
2006-08-01 10:03:21 · answer #6 · answered by flod_prfekshun 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is necessary but not sufficient to make a marriage work. A successful marriage also requires communication, cooperation, compromise, and most of all, commitment. If you love someone, you should be willing to do all four, but it's possible to love a person, but have a breakdown in one or all of them.
Also, money troubles never help a marriage, and money in excess can sometimes be bad also.
A good sex life and mutual physical attraction are indispensable as well.
2006-08-01 09:54:41 · answer #7 · answered by zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry hun, you can not just make it on love alone. You have to have communication, respect and understanding of the other person, you have to tollerate there differences there is so much besides love that goes into a marriage. Marriage is like a meatloaf,. you have to have alot of ingrediants to make right. But remember everyone likes there meatloaf with different ingrediants so you have to find the ones that work for you as a couple.
2006-08-01 10:04:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
unfortunately...no. I married at 19 and he was 23. We were madly in love and from different cultures and religions. It was 6 years of constant grief. I loved my husband but was unbearably unhappy. I ended up a divorced Mom of 3 kids. Had I known then what I know now, I'd have realized that loving someone is not the same as being "in love" with someone. Marriage is like a million piece puzzle and if one big piece is great but the others do not fit...you will never have a complete picture.
2006-08-01 09:59:08 · answer #9 · answered by roseanne v 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the great words of Tina Turner "What's Love Got To Do With It." You definitely need more. Like whether you actually like each other, whether you get along, if you don't mind looking at that person first thing in the morning and last thing at night, if you have the same core beliefs, etc. I'm on my third marriage and it all comes down to this.......Do I want to grow old with this person? Love is just icing on the cake. Good Luck!
2006-08-01 09:57:12 · answer #10 · answered by Gypsy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If love was all you needed then my marriage would still be alive today.. love takes mutual understanding, a game plan for what you want for your future... it takes hard work everyday to relearn or reinvent the spark that you saw in eachother that first day you met. Love takes work.. unfortunately these days people want a quick fix to it and this is why we have such a high divorce rate. I know how you feel hun... but love these day's takes more and I believe it's because of the priorities we've placed above relationships in our life.
2006-08-01 09:52:21 · answer #11 · answered by kitkool 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋