I found out yesterday that my wife is cheating on me. (I am 100% Positive and have proof.)
We just got married on June 17th 2006...
I really care for her and her two girls (Hers from a previous marriage...)
Ya, I'm DEEPLY hurt by her actions, but most of all, I feel sorry for her girls who are supposed to come back to our house in just a few weeks. My wife just must not care about those girls at all.
I am planning on calling her ex-husband later today and telling him to enrole the kids in school where he lives. I then plan on kicking her butt out to the curb.
I don't care what happens to her. All I know is that she really hurt me, her kids, and herself by making some seriously stupid decisions recently.
I am not perfect but I work hard and every penny I earn goes to bills to provide for her and her kids.
If there is a way I can hurt her as much as she has hurt everybody else (without breaking the law) please let me know. How do I get back at her for doing this to all of us???!!!
2006-08-01 06:09:08 · 32 answers · asked by sandblast_dude 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Forget the revenge it'll just eat you up. I applaud you for kicking her to the curb though. Good luck man.
2006-08-01 06:13:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The question you ask is very dangerous. I understand your suffering. I was married on June 18th of this year after 6 years of dating and a 1.5 year engagement. And I would be devastated, as would my husband if either of us were to commit such a heinous offense. If you do something painful, you will also emotionally hurt those little girls you care for...one way or another. As sad as it is, I think disolving your marriage is good enough to send the message that you're are less than a willing participant in her antics and you're not willing to go along for the ride. But, did you have any inklin of this type of behavior before and how long had you been together before you decided to "take the plunge" so to speak? Chances are there were signs to begin with that went unheeded. May I ask what your proff was and does she know you know right now? Don't let this ruin your future chances at romance. You are taking a stand and putting your self worth first and someone will appreciate that amazing quality that you have. You may also want to give her the opportunity to tell the father of her children herself and if not then you tell her you will because they deserve more than to have an irresponsible parent. The best you can do is to be an adult about it and do your best not to be spiteful, as much as you may want to poke her eyes out and bind her roaming hands. You will come out better for having the dignity to say...you know what..I am worth more than this and this is not what I want for myself or my future.
I am so sorry for your suffering, it is unfortunate that this person you married is not grown up.
best wishes for a healthy and happy future,
tharedhead
2006-08-01 06:22:08 · answer #2 · answered by tharedhead ((debajo del ombú)) 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear about your problem. You sound like really caring and nice guy. If there's no chance of the marriage being recociled whatsoever, you can get back at her through divorce. File it under "adultery". It's legal all the way around and people do it every day. I've been there before. You've been betrayed and deserve to feel angry. It's never fun but things really do get eventually better though it doesn't seem like it right now. They will. The best of luck to you! I hope that things turn out okay.
2006-08-01 06:22:01 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Success is the sweetest form of revenge. Rather than focusing any time, effort or energy hurting her, focus all of it on helping yourself. Take all that anger, frustration and hurt; channel all that negative energy into positive action.
On a very deep level, people who do what she's doing are selfish. They think the universe revolves around them. Even if you react negatively, you're still reacting to her. She's still the focus of your thoughts and actions, even in revenge. So, to her, you're actually "rewarding" her actions. By "getting back at her", you're actually letting her get to you.
The way to utterly frustrate her, the one thing she could never imagine, is that she no longer matters to you. That what she did, what she does, how she feels, what she wants... none of this even matters. That she just doesn't exist for you any more.
Instead of making her the continuing center of your world, make sure she's not even a part of it anymore. It will drive her completely insane, and you can focus your energy on your own life.
2006-08-01 06:43:41 · answer #4 · answered by antirion 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You aren't going to be able to hurt her like she hurt you and this is because your love is true and hers is not. She may care for you but she cares for herself more. I believe that cheating is for the weak and as for her hurting her girls, because they will be the ones to hurt in all this, it just proves what i said she is more worried about herself then anyone and i mean anyone else. You are making the right decision by leaving this women. I would let the ex husband know what is going on, but only if it is of the girls best interest, which in this case i believe it is
2006-08-01 06:19:21 · answer #5 · answered by angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, your wife is a slut, and she should have her butt kicked to the curb.
Second, the ***** betrayed you in a terrible way, and you have every right to want to get revenge.
But remember, 'revenge is a dish best served cold'. Right now you are furious and therefore not able to really think long-term and clearly.
It's good that you care about her kids, and don't want to see them hurt.
Before you do anything to your wife, I'd suggest getting a little bit of counseling to make sure you don't hurt the kids. After a calming down period, I am sure you will be able to come up with various schemes and plans that will cause deep, long-term, grief to the ***** that you will spend many hours enjoying without hurting yourself.
2006-08-01 06:19:13 · answer #6 · answered by profdave99 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can get back at her by getting on with her life, not taking any calls from her. (I hope you don't have any children by her) And letting her see how well you are doing. That is the best revenge, the other will only hurt you in the long run. Don't give her the satisfaction of letting her see, or know that you are trying to get even. This means you're wasting time and energy on her that will satisfy her and only makes her happy that you care enough to try to make her jealous, or get revenge.
2006-08-01 06:15:48 · answer #7 · answered by JBWPLGCSE 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to do anything to get her back. Karma will take care of that for you. Just continue being the good guy that you are and don't worry about the rest. You'll spend the rest of your life beating yourself up for this, so what you plan to do sounds wonderful! It's the best thing for her, throw her out, show her right now you're not going to put up with it, she'll either learn or move onto her next victim...It's not up to you to get revenge. She obviuosly doesn't care about you, so what makes you think if you get her back, she's gonna care? She's not, so your efforts will be tiresome and worthless. Just get her out, get your head right again, then WAIT for the right person to come to you. You can't look for love...it'll come to your front door when least expecting it. Good luck in life and love!
2006-08-01 06:19:16 · answer #8 · answered by Shining Ray of Light 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already sound like the mature one. Making arrangement for her kids. Thank God that you are thinking of her kids. Human Nature seems to be revenge. Stand above it all. Next time you know she is with him. Move all of her stuff out of the house to the front. Leave a note telling her that you know, and to get out. Tell her the plans for her kids and if she has a problem with it, she should have thought of that before she started banging someone else. I am sorry that your wife is such a cow, not all women are like that.
2006-08-01 06:17:26 · answer #9 · answered by mad_hat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give yourself a pat on the back for kicking her to the curb and facing the future with your head high. Don't look back. Delete her from your life. See if you can get an anulment and get her far away from you.
Don't seek revenge. Seek something better :-) A new love and move one. That alone will make her hurt, knowing that she screwed up.
Good luck!
2006-08-01 06:16:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I red your story dear and i wish the end of it was different BUT i don't blame u .... So yes it hurts and yes she is the looser and after all as u said she hurt her self and her kids, i think u r leaving her is enough to make a good revenge and plz don't think more than that about it coz now u r in a winner position so don't make a mistake and u will be blamed ... that's all and best wishes
2006-08-01 06:23:22 · answer #11 · answered by Clark794 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋