Me and my fiance have been together for 1 1/2 years. We lived together. He doesnt show me any compassion or love. He never talks to me and the thing is its not only me. He never talks to anyone. Hes stuck in his shell in his own world. He seems like he has no personality, if we go out he just sits there and does nothing while im trying to have a good time. For the past 3 months this has been an even bigger issue. He says 5 words to me all day. He never kisses me or touches me. Its been 4 months since weve made love. Ive tried for the past 3 months to let him know what hes doing wrong and tried to let him know i need love in my life but instead of taking my information and doing something about it he took it and pittyed himself. Now im kicking him out hes crying and begging me that he loves me so much. And I love him so much too it hurts so bad because I wanted it to work. My gut is telling me this is wrong but I dont want to be unhappy anymore! Can it be right if it hurts this bad?
2006-08-01 06:07:15 · 11 answers · asked by steelers1roeth7 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
you should probably take a break or something. he needs to get himself together before he can treat you the way you deserve.
2006-08-01 06:11:24 · answer #1 · answered by ♥love2havefun♥ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Always trust a gut feeling. Maybe he is addicted to pain killers or another type of drug or something. Look in to it. Sneak around in his stuff. Some people may not agree that doing that is the right thing to do, but he's not going to tell you. It's hard to tell what's going on with him, but you are doing the right thing by kicking him out for now. Think about how bad it would be if he acted like this after you guys got married? Then you'd have to be thinking about a divorce. I would call off the engagement, until he decides he wants a relationship again.
2006-08-01 06:14:37 · answer #2 · answered by Littlemissy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he been always like this? Perhaps he's just a quiet and shut person. I've dated guys like that, and I felt special because they are so antisocial with everyone that the fact that he talks or hangs out with me is like getting all the attention of a extroverted guy.
You should talk to him and do and effort to make him open up a little more and make you feel special. If not, break up with him. I know it's hard, but you can't be with someone who doesn't show ANY kind of emotion towards you. Good luck!
2006-08-01 06:16:11 · answer #3 · answered by Babadoo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ALWAYS LISTEN TO THAT GUT FEELING! B/c we always know what's best for us, but for some reason we tend to do otherwise-- we go against that gut feeling. Plus, you're lucky that you figured this out before it was too late! Imagine if you would've married this guy. Can you imagine being married to, spending the rest of your life with a guy that treated you that way? Oprah did a show on this before... you're saving yourself from a lot of heartache & money by ending it now.
2006-08-01 06:16:33 · answer #4 · answered by sam 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's right. That was how my ex was in my previous relationship. I had to be for "I love you's." He would never be social when we went out. I would constantly have to ask if he's having a good time. All I'd have to do was look at this face and my fun was shot. I HATED sex with him because it was routine and boring! Ugh! He would never hold my hand in public and hugging...I had to beg for that too!
In that relationship, I hated myself, failed 2 classes in college, and gained 60 lbs. It was pure torture.
If your fiance wants back in your life bad enough, he'll have to earn his way. He needs to proove to you that he really wants to be with you, even after the repeated conversations you've had with him regarding his lack of affection.
2006-08-01 06:13:37 · answer #5 · answered by littlerandiheather 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your gut is really your heart speaking and when we fail to listen to it we´re doomed to make mistakes. It´s like a sixth sense that speaks to you without the problems of logic which our heads can cause.
It poses the real questions that need an answer.
Do you still get butterflies in your stomach when you´re with your partner? Do you still count the minutes til he´s home ?
Thats what your gut feeling is all about.
Listen to it !!!!
2006-08-01 06:14:56 · answer #6 · answered by Peter R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Counseling for him of course.. obviously something is wrong w/him.. Now if he won't go and he still won't talk to u and tell u what the real deal is then u should leave him because ur happiness comes 1st no matter what issues he's having....
2006-08-01 06:13:16 · answer #7 · answered by Queen D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not marry him, if you have any second thoughts at all, its not woth the pain and agony! Let him know how you are feeling, talk about it, postpone the wedding and make sure you feel its right, cause even when it is right it can be very trying.
2006-08-01 06:12:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is depressed, make him agree to seek treatment a condition of your reconciliation.
If it's just the way he is ... then you are doing the right thing by breaking it off with him.
2006-08-01 06:12:41 · answer #9 · answered by BoomChikkaBoom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if your instincts are telling you that this guy and/or this situation isn't right for you, then go with that. there are billions of men out there and your instincts are usually pretty good [esecially for women].
2006-08-01 06:12:45 · answer #10 · answered by sweeternity2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋