I am pregnant and very well confused on what to do, i just had an abortion in april of this year ,?

Question

ijust had an abortion back in april ,of this year and i have kids already which are and 12 and 5, i do somewhat want to keep this baby because i feel like it was meant for me to have the baby, but there is this other feeling that makes me confused on what to do because i am moving on my own the first of september, and i want to be able to provide for my kids the same as i am now, but with another little one, i am not certain that i will be able to provide for my children at all as well as take care of bills in my new home, i know this is a very personal question, but i really need some input or opinions from others to ease my mind a little, please only tell me exactly what you feel, no matter what i understand that i am the only one to make this decision.

Answer 1

Adoption!!! I have a cousin who is unable to have children. She and her husband have only had one out of three (that I know of) adoption attempts be successful. Newborns are very easy to place with adoptive parents. You can even have an open adoption so that you can stay in contact with your child and his/her new family.

Answer 2

I have never been pregnant so I can't imagine what this is like for you. Typically I am against abortion, because some people use it for the wrong reasons, as a sort of birth control, but it is at times like this I waver in my opinion. Of course you want to give the best life you can to the two children you already have and another baby would definitely put the strain on your finances. Is the father in the picture? Is he willing to provide for his child?? If not, you have to ask yourself whether you can really take care of another baby without costing your other kids. I have a friend in a similar situation...she has three kids and she just found out she is pregnant with twins. Not only that, but she is in a loveless relationship with the father of those twins and now she feels she can't walk away. This is the hardest decision you may ever make, but you have to do what is right for you. No matter what choice you make, I would suggest taking better measures to make sure you never end up in this situation again. Sex isn't the most important thing in the world. Concentrate on your kids and your new life.

Answer 3

I am going to come off sounding harsh, but someone needs to speak for this baby you decided you were going to create by having sex. Everybaby that is created (besides by rape) is planned, if you think so or not. When you are on birth control of any kind (condoms, pill, patch, shot ect ect) it states that it is not 100%. So you know when you lay down to do the deed, that there is a chance. Small chance, but a chance. So then, a baby is created becase you decide to take that chance. Why should this baby be killed because you decided you were going to do it anyways? It seems to me, (and I am only making this comment because of your own post) that you just could give a damn about anything else besides getting your kicks in. You have now with in a year got pregnant TWICE when it was unwanted. Which will now make 2 babies that you will have murdered. Abortion isnt a form of birth control. It is a form of murder. I dont know when, in our society, it became alright to kill something with a heart beating and it be just fine and dandy.. EXPECIALLY A HUMAN. If you cant take care of your children, dont have sex. It is that simple. Your two children has a brother or sister that they will never know because you killed it, and if you do it again, they will have another brother or sister that they will not meet. Have you ever seen an aborted baby? Maybe you should go look it up online and see some pictures of babies that have been taken by selfish people like you. And after you see these pictures and if it dont effect you, then you will know that you are a heartless person. Sure, you want what is best for your children. BUT that should mean ALL of your children including the one you have in your belly right now. If that means you have to go with out, by all means, go with out. There is so many things out there now to help you. Adoption, assistance... Anything is better then killing a child that does not deserve it..... Like i said, I may sound harsh, but I am pregnant right now. And I could not imagin killing this child that I was given to protect.....

Answer 4

I kinda wonder if you had two children already, what made you get an abortion last time?

From the way you spoke, you sound like a single mom. Hats off for being able to do that in the first place. It all comes down to how much you value these children. If you truly want to be a good mother, I would suggest keeping the child. Certainly it might prove to be a struggle, but God doesn't give us anything we can't handle, and if we trust, He will always provide us with what we need. Besides, imagine how much more joy another baby will bring to your life- another person who is unlike any other in the whole world.

I wish you luck and blessings on your endeavor.

Answer 5

You may not like my answer but this is what I think. You just had an abortion and here you are pregnant again already, maybe God is trying to tell you something. Maybe you having this child is part of a plan. You could give birth to the child who will go on to find the cure for AIDS or cancer. I am strongly against abortion. I think it is selfish. If you don't want to have more kids then you should either not have sex, or use birth control. You should take responsibility for your actions. Your baby doesn't deserve to die because you made a mistake.

Answer 6

The choice is yours no matter what decision you make. I'm sorry that you are faced with this decision, but you are obviously an adult, so you are fully aware of all the birth control methods that are available to you. Either stop having sex or be safe about it. I am 25 yrs old, married with two children, and I also have my tubes tied. Maybe you should do the same. I also totally support a woman's right to choose, except when they take advantage of it and have selective abortions just because they don't want a child. I hope you teach your children to make better decisions when they are older.

Answer 7

Hey you sound like you are in a really hard place in your life!! I will definitely be praying for you and this new little one. I know that a few other people have mentioned adoption, but remember that this unique baby is an individual just like yourself. If you don't have the time or money right now that is just fine! But don't take the joy that he/she will be away from someone else..... you never know who that baby is going to become... maybe the next Einstein... This is a super hard position to be in and I'm very sorry you have to make this decision but PLEASE spend some serious thought about using some sort of birth control so you won't ever have to be in a position of this sort again.

Answer 8

You are right, it will be your final decision but I think that all children are gifts. It may be hard but if you want the baby, keep it. I don't think that you should abortion but that is my feeling. If you don't want the baby, not that you don't want it but that you feel that you could not provide as good of a life as you feel the baby deserves, adoption is a great option. There are plenty of people out there who can't have children and have the means to support them and give them a chance at life that you may not be able to. Whatever you chose to do, don't have regrets, think about it carefully, this is not an easy subject, it is a life we are talking about. Do what is right for you and right for the child. Keep your head up and stay strong! Good luck and congrats

Answer 9

Because you are the only one making this decision, I would give myself time and space to determine which decision would be best for me. You need to figure out if financially you can manage to give your children a happy home, and if you are capable of taking care of all of the children. There is always the possibility of giving the child up for adoption if you decide not to keep him or her. It could be that you were meant to give a child to a loving couple that can't have their own children. That way, you aren't having another abortion to feel guilty about. And you are giving yourself the time to make the right decision.

Answer 10

I would have the baby even though it is going to be tough. You can put the baby up for adoption and make some special couple very happy, also providing a life that perhaps you won't be able to give. I adopted a girl 20 years ago and she has had a good life with parents that love like their own. She also gave me a grandson last year.

Answer 11

I am so sorry to hear of your dilemma. I'm afraid anyone who tells you exactly what they think you should do is looking out for his or her own agenda rather than yours.

It sounds as though you are trying to figure out which decision is the lesser of two evils. Should you carry your pregnancy to term and risk not having the resources to support all three children later, or should you abort this pregnancy and wrestle with the emotional difficulties of not having a child that you wanted (at least on some level).

There are free centers that can provide you will counseling to help you determine which is the right course for you. You might want to see if there is a Planned Parenthood in your area. They can tell you about all your options -- including the third option of adoption.

You might want to consider what support you can get from your family. Unfortunately, you can't count on having reliable social services (e.g., food stamps and financial aid) these days. Ironically, the supposedly pro-life Bush administration doesn't care much about the lives of poor children once they're out of the womb. So I wouldn't count on always having access to the kinds of social services you and your children deserve. Our politicians are busy giving estate tax cuts to multi-millionaires.

I am sorry to hear of this difficult decision you are facing. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Peace,
MP