2006-08-01 02:27:34 · 12 answers · asked by mango 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
This is a powerful question.
For me, personally, I think it is harder to be loved by somebody who I don't love than to love somebody who does not love me. At least if I love somebody I know how I feel. I agree with Kipling. It is better to love and lose than never to love at all. The pain of the loss is terrible. But the experience of love, of loving, is the greatest thing. It makes you feel completely alive. What is hell is discovering that you cannot love or that you do not love. It is quite painful to learn that you cannot reciprocate somebody else's love.
At least if you love another you have the experience of what love does.
Both situations are unsatisfactory. But I would rather feel the ability to love than not. If the other person cannot reciprocate I just have to get off my high horse. But when I hop on another horse, at least I know what love is. So I feel spirited in the hunt. I can be responsible with this power called love.
I also feel that mutual love is relatively rare and tends to go in cycles. So it is quite important to know that you are able to love. The capacity to love is one of the great gifts built into a human being.
B. Lyons
2006-08-01 03:36:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Loving someone who doesn't love you is definitly harder. When you want to give them everything you have and they don't want it, its hard to think there is something not wrong with you, but it really isn't anything personal. They just don't feel the same way. When someone loves you but you don't love them its easier just to tell them the truth and move on with your own life.
2006-08-01 02:35:42 · answer #2 · answered by JR 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is much more harder to be in love with someone who doesnt love you.There comes a time when everything in your life seems to be meaningless.You start craving for that someone and in the process end up hurying yourself.The pain that one goes through becomes quite unbearables
2006-08-01 02:34:56 · answer #3 · answered by stuti g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love someone who does not love me.
If someone loves me and I do not love them, I would be understanding and kind to them. I would make it clear that i do not feel that way, but offer them my friendship and time, and know that I'm doing all I can to stop them from feeling bad.
If someone I love does not love me, they cannot be guaranteed to do me the same courtesy. They may not give me the time of day and that is devastating when you adore someone.
I guess the issue is control. You can better control the situation if it is the other person who loves you, whereas you have little control over your feelings for someone who does not love you and cannot force them to offer you friendship. You can drive yourself crazy over it.
Of course, most people will more likely prefer someone to love you who you do not love, as it is always preferable to be loved by someone, than no one.
In a relationship, it may be hard to tell someone you no longer love them, but it wouldn't be half as awful as loving them and them saying the same to you.
2006-08-01 02:37:24 · answer #4 · answered by old_but_still_a_child 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I find it harder to be loved by someone that you don't love. (I have been on both ends of your question) When you love someone that doesn't love you, it can hurt, but you deal with it in your own way, and hopefully, move on. When you don't love someone that loves you, you have to find the words to tell them so, which is difficult. You don't know how they would react. Would they get violent? suicidal? vindictive (you know, slash your car tires or something) It is much easier to deal with your own emotions.
2006-08-01 02:35:58 · answer #5 · answered by tweetymay 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It has been harder to love somebody that does not have the same feelings that they have about you as you have about them.
Often you find this with your girlfriends that you just hang out with, then you start doing more things with them, and suddenly you find that you have deeper feelings for them and for your own sanity you expose your heart to them.
Usually in my case they say that they have fun being with me, but they do not feel that there is anything more than that and they would like to continue being friends....if I can handle it.
Well, it is hard to go on from there, but I do...with the hope that their feelings for me change. But for the most part we end up drifting away....two have gotten married to others and life goes on.
2006-08-01 02:37:01 · answer #6 · answered by Dave 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Neither would be harder, cos I would not love one who does not love me and would release the one I cannot love. To go on with either would be to do a serious disservice to them respectively.
2006-08-01 02:42:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say both because when you love someone who doesn't love you back you crave that person more but then when someone loves you and you don't love them you freak because it's hard not to love someone who you can't.
2006-08-01 02:34:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think its hard to love someone who doesnt love you back because they could hurt you a lot and yet here you are still being stupid hoping they would love you back!
at least if someone loves you then its an ego boost... hehe i just hope they learn to love them back one day...
2006-08-01 02:36:01 · answer #9 · answered by yen12rs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
love someone who does not love me. i would think it is harder to understand rejection. although, i would hate having a person in love with me...chasing me..calling me..writing me or bugging me in any other way. that would drive me nuts.
2006-08-01 02:33:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋